Wedding Woes

Ugh, Monday

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
edited August 2020 in Wedding Woes
On the upside, we had a very productive weekend.  We busted our asses in the yard.  We weeded and mulched.  DH and DefConn cleaned out our sandbox. Things look so much better now.  

On the downside, my little sister called me crying yesterday morning because she'd been up all night sick, and urgent care sent her to the ER after checking her out.  She and BIL needed us to watch foster nephew.  It is her gallbladder, and it's angry.  I needs to come out ASAP.   She's back to work until she can get the surgery scheduled, but if she has another attack it's straight to emergency surgery. 

My poor dad was so freaked out.  Thankfully he was with my oldest nephew and other BIL, golfing, who kept him calm.  I cannot imagine how much stress this caused for him.  I won't be surprised if he goes to check on her in the next day or two.

He blamed his bad golf game on her (jokingly). I told her this was NOT on the 2020 bingo card.  Hee.  

So yeah, definitely a mixed bag of a weekend. 

Re: Ugh, Monday

  • @mrsconn23 tell your sister having just lived through it, she will feel soooo much better once the angry gallbladder is out.  It's almost an immediate improvement in everything and no more scary food issues.  I was told basically the same thing.  I went into a vegan diet until surgery b/c my last attack was so bad and I just couldn't live through another one.  I lost 10 pounds b/c I was so strict with my food; it's easy when the other option is "worst pain of your life".

    The weekend was boring and that's okay.  I got myself back on the cooking train. I just need to have a game plan for when I'm like, Eff, cooking!! that isn't eating out and I'd be a lot better off.  My allergies are just bad right now.  My allergy medication just isn't doing the job.

    Otherwise, SSDD.
  • I remember you talking about that @VarunaTT.  My mom had similar gallbladder issues before she had hers taken out.  Her husband had his out a few years ago.  She's looking forward to getting it removed.  
  • ugh Monday is right! I think I’m taking next Monday off so I don’t have to deal with it! Sorry about your sister @mrsconn23, I’m hoping she can get in real quick.

    I’m waiting for my banker to tell me my refi is ready to go and then I’m waiting on the damn contractor to show me some samples and give me a start date.  I really want my kitchen done. This waiting game is agony.  My kitchen is really non functional. 


  • Ugh @charlotte989875, I had issues with my leave back in May.  It's such a headache and I wasn't taking care of a newborn on top of it.  I hope you don't have to make too many calls or deal with too much fuckery. 

    Also, I'm sorry you're having PPD/A/baby blues.  We're here for you.  ((virtual hugs)) 
  • We made it through the weekend and my sister finally got to meet the baby, from a distance. It was good to finally see her and she was so reassuring about all the anxiety and feelings. The baby blues are no joke. 

    My work also screwed up my leave pay so I’m trying to sort that out as well on very little sleep. 
    Blues are NOT a joke.   I cried SO MUCH when Chiquita was born.   I wanted to know why I got pregnant, why people do it on purpose, when I'd get sleep and fantasized about needing an appendectomy because it was minor enough that I'd probably be just fine but would get more sleep in the hospital.  NYE was when Chiquita was 4 weeks old and DH kissed her first.   I cried serious tears that night and freaked out on him.   He didn't do a bad thing - I was just super emotional.

    I say all of this to tell you that if you think there are NO signs of change and you aren't able to see a light at the end of the tunnel call your doctor.   My fog lifted by about week 4.5/5.   If it lasted longer I would have needed something to assist me chemically. 
  • Ugh Monday pretty much sums up how I feel today. Feeling tired and my period started today just feel blah. Had a good weekend, Saturday we took the kids to the lake and let them play in the sand and splash around. My 4.5 year old is in such a sweet phase and she loved it so much! The next morning she emphatically thanked me and H for taking her!

    Sunday I did laundry and some cleaning and then took the kids to my parents for the day and figured I would let H have some  "me time" He wanted to clean up the garage a little but otherwise said he just wanted to have a lazy day. I get it he works hard and rarely gets time to just lounge. I am annoyed with him today though and not sure if it's completely justified or not. I got home late last night, put the kids to bed and then when to bed myself. Normally I pick up and make sure things are pretty much in order on Sunday nights to help make the work week go smoother. Well this morning I came down to the kitchen to find it left in disarray with Husbands dinner dishes, pot on the pan that he made popcorn in, bowl with kernels, dirty tray he must have made soft pretzels on with salt. Now he is normally pretty good about pitching in and cleaning-up after himself so I am trying to bite my tongue because it very well might be his intention to clean the kitchen tonight, but WTH? Lol. I just hate knowing I am coming home to a mess on top of all the other things we need to accomplish on a normal weeknight with 2 kids.


  • Weekend was good. FSIL and FI were supposed to come over for dinner and drinks but last week was rough and we were all feeling really drained so we canceled. It was really nice to just relax and hang out with FI. I still didn’t get enough sleep, but apparently I’m allergic to it. I had a facial on Saturday that was nice and relaxing, although whatever product she used on my chest apparently was not the business because it is breaking out like crazy now. My face is fine though. I’m just hoping this week is a little smoother. I’m sure approaching it with slightly more energy will help. 

    In other news, SSDD. It’s hot as hell here, and I’m planning on a hike with FSIL tonight. Hopefully my hip behaves. 


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  • @Jstump2 I would 100% be annoyed but I am also trying to tame that instant annoyance because it builds up if I let it. FX he cleans it tonight.

    SSDD here. I have been feeling so tired and kindof like I have had a headache so long I can't remember life without one. But idk what to do about it. I have taken my vitamins 3 days in a row, eaten things besides candy, drank water.... Can't I just feel and look amazing while doing the bare minimum of maintenance! Is that too much to ask?

    DH and I are throwing around our next holiday ideas. The list of places we can go is limited now (who foresaw the days when having an American passport would be detrimental?) but there are several I would love to go to, namely Croatia. It is where I wanted to honeymoon but it was 1) shot down and 2) we skipped our honeymoon to move. 🙄
  • @missJeanLouise I have already decided I am ordering takeout because I detest cooking in a dirty kitchen and I will be home first and would normally cook. We have had disagreements in the past that I get annoyed at him for not doing things on my timeline even though he gets them done. For example, He will wait to the last minute to pack or load up up the car. If I do nothing and leave him alone it does get done and normally doesn't make too much of a difference but it drives me crazy waiting to the last minute!
  • I'm feeling pretty blech myself.  Nothing major.  Just feeling overwhelmed and over-worried.  Unfortunately, it seems like that has become my new way of life!

    I did get a lot of relaxation in over the weekend.  I've had Hulu for awhile now, but never really looked into it much.  However, I finally dove in and found tons of stuff to watch.  My big "win" is that I now have access to a lot of the shows on IDHD (true crime).  I binge-watched four episodes on the latest season of "Deadly Women".  That used to be one of my favorite channels, but the SCUM that is my cable company had a handful of non-sports channels that were only available with the "sports package".  I dropped the sports package when I realized it was costing me an extra $50/month.  But IDHD was one of the random channels included in it, so I lost it.

    I also binge-watched the first season of Dollface.  I thought it was a nice mix of comedy with drama/self-reflection.  I am the WORST for being able to place actors.  I watched all those shows with it driving me nuts that I couldn't place the main actress.  I finally Googled it just now.  Kat Dennings from "Two Broke Girls".  Thank you for the relief, Google!  It was bugging me so much, lol. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • wait @short+sassy is IDHD just investigation discovery in HD? I lost that channel about a year ago when I changed up packages too!  I loved some of the shows on there and really miss them.  I will also have to catch Dollface.  Kat Dennings is my girl.  Well, at least she is as Max. 

  • wait @short+sassy is IDHD just investigation discovery in HD? I lost that channel about a year ago when I changed up packages too!  I loved some of the shows on there and really miss them.  I will also have to catch Dollface.  Kat Dennings is my girl.  Well, at least she is as Max. 
    Yes, that's the same channel.  If you have Hulu or get it, lots of their shows are on there!

    Dollface is about a woman named Jules (Kat Dennings) whose fiancé broke up with her.  So now she is realizing the importance of female friendships and discovering herself.  She is trying to rebuild friendships she let go to the wayside when she was too busy with her b/f and also start new ones.  But one of the "catches" of the show is, occasionally the thoughts that are playing out in her mind are also played out as a scene in the show.  It happens just often enough to be funny.  But not so often that it gets boring, routine, and confusing.

    For example, she decides she wants to go have lunch with the "cool" women at her workplace.  She starts to walk over to their table and the table backs away a couple feet.  She comes closer and it backs away again.  She starts to run after it and it starts moving faster away from her, until she finally catches up to it and sits down.

    If you like the character Max, I think you'll like her character in this show also.  There is similar "sarcasm/jokes said with a straight face".
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • mrsconn23 said:
    Ugh @charlotte989875, I had issues with my leave back in May.  It's such a headache and I wasn't taking care of a newborn on top of it.  I hope you don't have to make too many calls or deal with too much fuckery. 

    Also, I'm sorry you're having PPD/A/baby blues.  We're here for you.  ((virtual hugs)) 
    Thank you!! I’m logging on in between feeds and hopefully they’ll have it straightened out. It’s frustrating as our leave is handled by a third party so it’s going between multiple offices. They assured me it was all fine before I left so we’ll see. 
  • banana468 said:
    We made it through the weekend and my sister finally got to meet the baby, from a distance. It was good to finally see her and she was so reassuring about all the anxiety and feelings. The baby blues are no joke. 

    My work also screwed up my leave pay so I’m trying to sort that out as well on very little sleep. 
    Blues are NOT a joke.   I cried SO MUCH when Chiquita was born.   I wanted to know why I got pregnant, why people do it on purpose, when I'd get sleep and fantasized about needing an appendectomy because it was minor enough that I'd probably be just fine but would get more sleep in the hospital.  NYE was when Chiquita was 4 weeks old and DH kissed her first.   I cried serious tears that night and freaked out on him.   He didn't do a bad thing - I was just super emotional.

    I say all of this to tell you that if you think there are NO signs of change and you aren't able to see a light at the end of the tunnel call your doctor.   My fog lifted by about week 4.5/5.   If it lasted longer I would have needed something to assist me chemically. 
    Thank you so much for sharing this; I’m only 9 days in and from what I’ve read tings should lift soon I hope. I have my follow up next Monday with my doctor to check my incision so if it’s not any better I’ll talk with her then. 

    There’s so much crying and I just worry something will happen to him or he’ll stop breathing and I won’t know. It’s a lot. 
  • Jstump2 said:
    @missJeanLouise I have already decided I am ordering takeout because I detest cooking in a dirty kitchen and I will be home first and would normally cook. We have had disagreements in the past that I get annoyed at him for not doing things on my timeline even though he gets them done. For example, He will wait to the last minute to pack or load up up the car. If I do nothing and leave him alone it does get done and normally doesn't make too much of a difference but it drives me crazy waiting to the last minute!
    Ugh! I am the same way. I have to walk away or find something else to do so often because he takes forever. But it is like you said, just because it's not on my timeline doesn't make it wrong. *Eye twitch*
  • @Jstump2 I would 100% be annoyed but I am also trying to tame that instant annoyance because it builds up if I let it. FX he cleans it tonight.

    SSDD here. I have been feeling so tired and kindof like I have had a headache so long I can't remember life without one. But idk what to do about it. I have taken my vitamins 3 days in a row, eaten things besides candy, drank water.... Can't I just feel and look amazing while doing the bare minimum of maintenance! Is that too much to ask?

    DH and I are throwing around our next holiday ideas. The list of places we can go is limited now (who foresaw the days when having an American passport would be detrimental?) but there are several I would love to go to, namely Croatia. It is where I wanted to honeymoon but it was 1) shot down and 2) we skipped our honeymoon to move. 🙄
    I feel you on Croatia. Some boat captain had 1k of my money as a non refundable deposit for the boat trip i was supposed to be on right now. Fingers crossed for next year!
  • banana468 said:
    We made it through the weekend and my sister finally got to meet the baby, from a distance. It was good to finally see her and she was so reassuring about all the anxiety and feelings. The baby blues are no joke. 

    My work also screwed up my leave pay so I’m trying to sort that out as well on very little sleep. 
    Blues are NOT a joke.   I cried SO MUCH when Chiquita was born.   I wanted to know why I got pregnant, why people do it on purpose, when I'd get sleep and fantasized about needing an appendectomy because it was minor enough that I'd probably be just fine but would get more sleep in the hospital.  NYE was when Chiquita was 4 weeks old and DH kissed her first.   I cried serious tears that night and freaked out on him.   He didn't do a bad thing - I was just super emotional.

    I say all of this to tell you that if you think there are NO signs of change and you aren't able to see a light at the end of the tunnel call your doctor.   My fog lifted by about week 4.5/5.   If it lasted longer I would have needed something to assist me chemically. 
    Also I had the thought of “why didn’t we stay the third night in the hospital when we had them chance?!!” They took care of me and the baby the entire time! 
  • banana468 said:
    We made it through the weekend and my sister finally got to meet the baby, from a distance. It was good to finally see her and she was so reassuring about all the anxiety and feelings. The baby blues are no joke. 

    My work also screwed up my leave pay so I’m trying to sort that out as well on very little sleep. 
    Blues are NOT a joke.   I cried SO MUCH when Chiquita was born.   I wanted to know why I got pregnant, why people do it on purpose, when I'd get sleep and fantasized about needing an appendectomy because it was minor enough that I'd probably be just fine but would get more sleep in the hospital.  NYE was when Chiquita was 4 weeks old and DH kissed her first.   I cried serious tears that night and freaked out on him.   He didn't do a bad thing - I was just super emotional.

    I say all of this to tell you that if you think there are NO signs of change and you aren't able to see a light at the end of the tunnel call your doctor.   My fog lifted by about week 4.5/5.   If it lasted longer I would have needed something to assist me chemically. 
    Also I had the thought of “why didn’t we stay the third night in the hospital when we had them chance?!!” They took care of me and the baby the entire time! 
    This is also when you get to say to your H:
    1) I NEED you to do this.   For DH and me when he took paternity leave it meant he'd stay up with Chiquita until 3 AM and I'd get a solid 3 hours of sleep.   It seems like not a lot but it was what I needed to re-charge.
    2) If he's not doing what were your chores he needs to.
    3) He can get on the phone with your mom, tell her to quarantine and get her shit together, stop seeing other family members and then show up at your house because THIS is how you help your kids. 
  • We made it through the weekend and my sister finally got to meet the baby, from a distance. It was good to finally see her and she was so reassuring about all the anxiety and feelings. The baby blues are no joke. 

    My work also screwed up my leave pay so I’m trying to sort that out as well on very little sleep. 
    I'm glad you made it through the weekend and that you got to see your sister. And I hope the baby blues come to an end for you soon and that you get your pay straightened out. Those things suck.
  • Today has been quiet. I finished all my work assignments so I'm waiting to find out if there's anything I can actually do to earn my pay. It's weird not having anything to work on.

    Then again, in a few weeks I'll be very much appreciating this period of calm when the extended tax deadlines approach.

    Last week I had to take my computer to a shop because it wouldn't power up. It'll be a week and a half before anyone can even look at it...and that's after driving to three "certified repair" shops that were all closed (one turned out to be at a nonexistent address) and having a technician visit my office. He couldn't get it to work and told me to take it to the store where it now is.

    The birthday Zooms are going ahead. My parents wanted for there to be two of them: one as a family/family friend reunion (really for them) and one for immediate family and my personal friends. I gave this some thought and decided that the dynamics of all the people involved made this the best solution. Lots of people on that first Zoom, including a few I wasn't expecting! But I'm okay with it.
  • banana468 said:
    We made it through the weekend and my sister finally got to meet the baby, from a distance. It was good to finally see her and she was so reassuring about all the anxiety and feelings. The baby blues are no joke. 

    My work also screwed up my leave pay so I’m trying to sort that out as well on very little sleep. 
    Blues are NOT a joke.   I cried SO MUCH when Chiquita was born.   I wanted to know why I got pregnant, why people do it on purpose, when I'd get sleep and fantasized about needing an appendectomy because it was minor enough that I'd probably be just fine but would get more sleep in the hospital.  NYE was when Chiquita was 4 weeks old and DH kissed her first.   I cried serious tears that night and freaked out on him.   He didn't do a bad thing - I was just super emotional.

    I say all of this to tell you that if you think there are NO signs of change and you aren't able to see a light at the end of the tunnel call your doctor.   My fog lifted by about week 4.5/5.   If it lasted longer I would have needed something to assist me chemically. 
    True story.......SIL gave birth to identical twin boys on December 14.....25 years ago.  A day or two after being home, she called the OB because she was sure the pain she was experiencing was beyond post partum.  She got a "pat on the hand/there, there" assurance and was told to increase Ibuprofen.  Nope.  Emergency appendectomy less than 24 hours later.  I suddenly found myself caring for newborn twins 10 days prior to Christmas......and the ONE year I did a bit of procrastinating!  No one got any sleep because she was pumping at the hospital and I was at home with my brother, the first time dad, and babies LOL
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