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You should talk to your friend, but this sounds illegal and dangerous.

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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edited December 2020 in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,

My best friend has been dating someone new after ending a long-term relationship. A large factor in their relationship seems to be their shared love of drugs: ketamine, molly, opium, mescaline, poppers, and the like. Though I have my own concerns with my best friend using drugs frequently, my real issue is that her new partner is an ER doctor. This doctor routinely works several shifts in a row and then goes on drug benders with my friend for multiple days. Though I don’t think the doctor goes to work high, I feel a nagging concern that they should not be treating patients. Can someone provide excellent health care and also be a heavy drug user? I mean, I wouldn’t voluntarily choose a doctor who did drugs on the side. Should I write HR a confidential letter to drug-test the doctor (most hospitals don’t routinely drug-test physicians)? Should I mind my business?

—Doctored Doctor

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Re: You should talk to your friend, but this sounds illegal and dangerous.

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    banana468banana468 member
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    I have heard of plenty of docs that drink or smoke weed but anything that has long residual effects especially that are not regulated AT ALL seems risky to the user at best and at worst - extremely risky to patients. 

    I don't think you should mind your business.  Find out what ways you can anonymously report someone to a medical board.  This stops being just about him when he could be treating others.  If he's an ER doc what stops him from being called in when he wasn't planning to be there while high?  We're in the middle of a pandemic and hospital staffing isn't exactly a low need at this point. 
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    charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    You can make an anonymous complaint to a medical board or the hospital but before you do you should make sure you’re certain you know what’s going on. The “seems to be” gives me pause- have you seen him take drugs? Do you know for sure he’s using? If so then yes you could be saving someone’s life by reporting this. But if you’re not you could be ruining someone’s life based off of an assumption. Make sure you’re correct before moving forward. 
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    downtondivadowntondiva member
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    edited December 2020
    I agree that anyone who's going on drug benders like that shouldn't be practicing medicine. We're not talking about someone smoking weed on their day off after a long and stressful shift and they'll be fine and ready to work their next one. This does sound dangerous.

    That said, when you say "seems to be," is that just a turn of phrase or does it mean you are speculating about this person's drug use? Even if you are right, this is a VERY serious allegation to be making, and you need to be able to back it up with more than just a hunch if you're going to report them.
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    banana468banana468 member
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    Does the OP really need to back it up?   At the OP's  worst assumption she has a friend who embellishes and he defends himself with a hair test.   If she does nothing then there's someone who is treating patients under the influence.  @levioosa can chime in here but my guess is that he would have the opportunity to defend himself by submitting to testing and would not be canned based on the reporting alone right? 
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    levioosalevioosa member
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    @banana468 reporting alone won’t get you fired. But a positive test would. Usually what happens is they offer the “offender” the opportunity to go to rehab. It gets reported to the Board of Medicine and pending successful rehabilitation license will be put on probation or be reinstated. There’s no guarantee your job will still be there, but usually places work with you unless your errors and behavior have been beyond the pale. I know that’s how it usually works in CA. I’m sure other states are much less forgiving. At my clinic even testing positive for marijuana is an immediate fireable offense due to the type of funding we receive. 


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    banana468banana468 member
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    levioosa said:
    @banana468 reporting alone won’t get you fired. But a positive test would. Usually what happens is they offer the “offender” the opportunity to go to rehab. It gets reported to the Board of Medicine and pending successful rehabilitation license will be put on probation or be reinstated. There’s no guarantee your job will still be there, but usually places work with you unless your errors and behavior have been beyond the pale. I know that’s how it usually works in CA. I’m sure other states are much less forgiving. At my clinic even testing positive for marijuana is an immediate fireable offense due to the type of funding we receive. 
    That's what I figured.  If the OP reported this guy he would then be forced to submit to a test to prove innocence or that the OP is correct.    The reporting itself would not be its own reason to be terminated. 

    I'm a big believer that sometimes for the greater good you don't just stay quiet and this is one of those times. 
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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    I'd be curious as to how well acquainted OP even is with the best friend's partner to make these assumptions. How does she know they both go on drug benders for days? I don't know. It just feels maybe not OK to report something like this unless she really has proof? 

    Also, I had to google what "poppers" are. And then I realized that I knew what it was, but under a different name ("rush") because my friends and I did it in HS...haha. But honestly, I remember it being a liquid you sniffed, and the effects of it wore off extremely quickly. And you could buy it legally, I think. 
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    STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
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    Stop being friends with this dramatic person and mind your business. 
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    MNNEBrideMNNEBride member
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    If the bf and partner is indeed using ketamine (among other things), I'd have to wonder if partner is getting it from work.  They would certainly have access to it being in the E.D.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    MNNEBride said:
    If the bf and partner is indeed using ketamine (among other things), I'd have to wonder if partner is getting it from work.  They would certainly have access to it being in the E.D.
    For. Sure. 
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    MNNEBride said:
    If the bf and partner is indeed using ketamine (among other things), I'd have to wonder if partner is getting it from work.  They would certainly have access to it being in the E.D.
    One of my former tenants is a veterinarian who worked at an animal hospital.  Because it was a hospital, they were open 24/7.  But there was usually only 1-2 people there for the overnight shift.

    There was an incident where the morning shift came in and the vet tech who'd been working the overnight shift was passed out from a ketamine OD.

    The vet tech recovered and was physically fine, but lost her job.  Though it was an upsetting experience for everyone.
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