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Classic: Just ask if they want to join you for your bday.

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
in Wedding Woes
I moved to a new city about nine months ago, and while I’ve started building a group of wonderful friends, at this point it primarily comprises roommates and co-workers because my demanding work schedule doesn’t allow time for much socializing. I will be turning 30 in a few weeks. I have never been incredibly invested in birthday parties, and generally hate being the center of attention, but it would feel a little sad to let this milestone pass without celebration. None of my friendships are at the point where they would organize something for my birthday, but I think many of them would be glad to help me celebrate. But planning my own birthday party seems gauche and a little desperate, since I am newly forming these friendships. What’s the etiquette here?
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Re: Classic: Just ask if they want to join you for your bday.

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    CasadenaCasadena member
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    I think banana is exactly right. Just casually throw out and invite including the bill split expectation and see what happens. 
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    The only thing that would be gauche is someone throwing themselves a party/event and then expecting presents and/or for other people to pay for them.

    But I think it's very normal for adults to meet up casually and celebrate someone's birthday and there's nothing wrong with her suggesting it, especially with a phrase like @banana468 suggested.  Just to make it clear that she is not hosting it nor expects for people to pay for her. 
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    VarunaTTVarunaTT member
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    There are some things about etiquette that I think just doesn't mesh with 2023. 

    Throw your own damn party.  I do it all the time, but I host the party.  I don't expect gifts or people to bring things, I do it so that I can have fun with my friends.
    �
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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    VarunaTT said:
    There are some things about etiquette that I think just doesn't mesh with 2023. 

    Throw your own damn party.  I do it all the time, but I host the party.  I don't expect gifts or people to bring things, I do it so that I can have fun with my friends.
    Yup, ditto this. 
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