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Who's should go?
Customs and Traditions
Who's should go?
Ask questions or share your ideas about incorporating cultures and heritage into your wedding.
My Fience and I are wanting to go look at the reception hall this weekend we are fairly sure its the one were going to use. As both of our parents are fairly close to the hall I was going to invite b
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Customs and Traditions
Who's should go?
Ask questions or share your ideas about incorporating cultures and heritage into your wedding.
My Fience and I are wanting to go look at the reception hall this weekend we are fairly sure its the one were going to use. As both of our parents are fairly close to the hall I was going to invite b
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Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36
Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:b807cc99-140d-44ed-b143-017e98adbf72
Forums  >  Wedding Boards  >  Customs and Traditions  >  Who's should go?
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Who's should go?

posted at 2/8/2012 2:18 PM EST on theknot.com
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My Fience and I are wanting to go look at the reception hall this weekend we are fairly sure its the one were going to use. As both of our parents are fairly close to the hall I was going to invite both parents so they could both see where it is and see inside other than the one picture online. His parents don't know where its at and its out of the way for them to just drive by like 40 minutes out of the way. My mom thinks it should just be my parents and us. If you were in this situation who should be going?

Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/8/2012 2:29 PM EST on theknot.com
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In Response to Who's should go?:
My Fience and I are wanting to go look at the reception hall this weekend we are fairly sure its the one were going to use. As both of our parents are fairly close to the hall I was going to invite both parents so they could both see where it is and see inside other than the one picture online. His parents don't know where its at and its out of the way for them to just drive by like 40 minutes out of the way. My mom thinks it should just be my parents and us. If you were in this situation who should be going?
Posted by MeganJasonDerby


Invite everybody. Let them decide if they want to make the drive or not.

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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/8/2012 2:46 PM EST on theknot.com
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Why does your mom think it should just be them and you two? Why doesn't she want your future in-laws to go?


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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/8/2012 3:25 PM EST on theknot.com
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I think it woud be nice to invite your in-laws and let them decide if they want to come, but it's not a requirement, especially if they are contributing money.

However, keep in mind that more opinions isn't always better.  It could get too stressful to have everyone there.  Maybe you could wait and bring the FILs to see if after you've already signed a contract?

Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/8/2012 4:03 PM EST on theknot.com
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I brought my mom and my FI's mom, they both appriciated being able to see the places after we had narrowed it down.

Also as a PP has mentioned if that is your full name, I would recommend deleating this account and opening a new one with a nick name for your safety.
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/8/2012 7:53 PM EST on theknot.com
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We invited my parents and FMIL.  My dad thought it was odd and actually asked me: Why is FI coming with us to look at the reception halls?  I thought he was asking me a trick question and answered, because its his wedding too.  When my parents married, my dad and his family basically stayed out of the reception hall stuff, since that is tradionally what the bride's family pays for.  And he thought it was kinda the same now. 

So invite everyone and let them decide for themselves to attend or not. 

And as PP said, if your screenname is your real name, please change it for internet safety reasons.
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/9/2012 12:11 AM EST on theknot.com
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I don't see the big deal. Nobody saw what the reception hall looked like until the wedding. That being said, I don't believe your future ILs would be offended if you just asked.
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/9/2012 2:22 PM EST on theknot.com
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That's weird that your mom wants to exclude your FILs.
We took our parents to the venue after we signed the contract.
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/9/2012 3:09 PM EST on theknot.com
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I'm no help here, my H and I were the only ones who saw the venue prior to the wedding. 
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/9/2012 3:45 PM EST on theknot.com
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My husband and I went to check out places ourselfs first. When we found one we wanted to use we invited my parents and his to go look at it. And it is true more options is not always better. Make sure you tell the family that is coming that you and your fiance really like this venue and you are inviting them to help with decorating tip or something so they know not to be to negative about it.

Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/10/2012 4:26 AM EST on theknot.com
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Who is paying for the wedding/reception hall?  If FI's parents are not contributing financially and your parents are, I can see why your mother would not want them helping make decisions (especially when it's on your parent's dime).
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/10/2012 9:12 AM EST on theknot.com
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FI's mom came with FI, my mom, & me to look at one place & then a couple weekends later FI's parents came down & we made a day of looking at venues with them & my mom. FI's mom was extremely helpful, asking questions that I didn't think to ask. I'm glad we were able to share the experience with them.
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/10/2012 4:46 PM EST on theknot.com
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I went with just my parents but mainly because it is out of state. We brought a video camera and documented the walk through so the in-laws could see it and they loved that.

Just a thoguht in case your mom is really against them coming.. but that is a little odd.
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Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/14/2012 11:30 AM EST on theknot.com
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IMO, those who pay should be the ones going.  It would be nice to invite the in-laws, but let them know they don't have to come if it's inconvenient.  Everybody just nod & smile, & you'll get through it!

Re: Who's should go?

posted at 2/29/2012 1:28 AM EST on theknot.com
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Maybe her mom is being sentimental about her baby getting married and wants to have that moment with her?  Might not be anything against the future in laws.

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