Can someone explain to me

Knottie79829663

Hello. What is a dollar dance and why is this being brought up to me? lol I have never heard of this before! All I can think of is people throwing dollars at me and me hurrying to pick them up like I am a stripper lol.

climbingsingle

Just say no to the dollar dance!!! 

I've only heard about the dollar dance here on TK, but from what I understand, people pay to dance with the bride at the wedding. I don't know. 

daria24

I come from Central PA, and an Eastern European family. The way it's done in my area is guests form two lines, one for the bride, one for the groom. The MOH and BM each have a bag, jar, box, etc for guests to place their money in. Some people only give a $1, some more. Then each person takes a turn dancing with the bride or groom, usually about 30 seconds. In Polish tradition, the money dance was meant to generate cash to give the newlyweds enough money to start out their lives (no other wedding gifts were typically given). In Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle" there is a chapter with a wedding and a money dance. 

Other cultures pin money to the brides dress or throw money at the couple. But I've never been to a wedding that did that.

AddieCake

People pay the bride and groom to dance with them.

CMGragain

This is only done in a few cultures, mostly Polish.  It is dying out.  Unless you are from a culture that does this, forget about it!

dcaviston

This dance is popular in my area. It goes back to a tradition of wedding guests paying money to dance with the bride. The MOH wears a bonnet and a special apron during the dance to collect the money in the apron, guests line up and have to pay to dance with the bride. The idea is that the money goes towards helping the new couple start their nest egg. It was done at my cousin's wedding and by the time I got to her she was begging me to hide her because her feet were killing her and she felt like she was going to vomit since everyone felt the need to spin her. She had like 150 guests at the wedding and at the end they had about $300 dollars since some people put more than a dollar in, but she did not enjoy the next hour of her reception because she was dizzy and tired.

Pepsi20

This is actually a frequently done thing in my area IL/IA. Typically what happens is People pay a dollar or more if they choose to dance with the bride and groom. Nowadays most couples use the money for their honeymoon. I have been to several wedding receptions where this is done. It your reception do what you want to do. Good Luck and congrats!

QueerFemme

Just because it's common in certain circles, doesn't mean it's not tacky. Skip it.

Jen4948

Pepsi20 said:

This is actually a frequently done thing in my area IL/IA. Typically what happens is People pay a dollar or more if they choose to dance with the bride and groom. Nowadays most couples use the money for their honeymoon. I have been to several wedding receptions where this is done. It your reception do what you want to do. Good Luck and congrats!

This is not an excuse for being rude and tacky.

climbingsingle

Pepsi20 said:

This is actually a frequently done thing in my area IL/IA. Typically what happens is People pay a dollar or more if they choose to dance with the bride and groom. Nowadays most couples use the money for their honeymoon. I have been to several wedding receptions where this is done. It your reception do what you want to do. Good Luck and congrats!

No. It's still rude. 

Knottie79829663

Thank you for explaining everything to me. I think my fiancé really wants to do it so i'll be a team player lol

beachyone15

I'd like to point out something else about Dollar Dances. We all know it's rude to have your guests "pay" to dance with you. In addition, think about their feelings during these dances. I went to a close friend's wedding who did a Dollar Dance and "chipped in" to dance with her (not knowing at the time how rude it was). I only got about 5 seconds to dance with her (seriously) and when I got pushed out by the next person, I remember thinking "Wow, that was really short and not worth it. We didn't even get to talk". Not fun.

Knottie79829663

I don't think that anyone would or should think that it is "rude" seeing as how we are inviting around 200 people to our wedding and there has to be an understanding that you must share and everyone who wants a turn shall get a turn.

chibiyui

Knottie79829663 said:

Thank you for explaining everything to me. I think my fiancé really wants to do it so i'll be a team player lol

If he wants to do it, his ass can be up there shaking for singles. This is one of those times you shouldn't take on for the team.

If you want a time to dance with everyone, you can ask for advice instead of dollars, or hold a receiving line after your ceremony to get one on one time with each guest.

beachyone15

Knottie79829663 said:

I don't think that anyone would or should think that it is "rude" seeing as how we are inviting around 200 people to our wedding and there has to be an understanding that you must share and everyone who wants a turn shall get a turn.

A 5-second turn....
Why not do a receiving line or table visits instead?

Knottie79829663

That's a thought. nothing is set in stone lol. I just need more ideas on wedding stuff

sarah1551 said:

Knottie79829663 said:

I don't think that anyone would or should think that it is "rude" seeing as how we are inviting around 200 people to our wedding and there has to be an understanding that you must share and everyone who wants a turn shall get a turn.

A 5-second turn....
Why not do a receiving line or table visits instead?

beachyone15

Knottie79829663 said:

That's a thought. nothing is set in stone lol. I just need more ideas on wedding stuff

sarah1551 said:

Knottie79829663 said:

I don't think that anyone would or should think that it is "rude" seeing as how we are inviting around 200 people to our wedding and there has to be an understanding that you must share and everyone who wants a turn shall get a turn.

A 5-second turn....
Why not do a receiving line or table visits instead?

SITB
No worries. I just wanted to share my own experience with Dollar Dances. I am a big fan of table visits and that's what I plan on doing for our wedding. It's nice to be able to have a few minutes to talk to the bride and groom without being rushed and I think your guests would appreciate it.

lilacck28

If you have never heard of the dollar dance, then that means that there will probably be many guests of yours who have also never heard of the dollar dance. I had never heard of it before going on the knot, and I would be APPALLED to witness it in person. Well, more like very embarrassed for the couple. I agree with your earlier confusion-- it sounds like being a stripper. Which, if that is anyone's profession, that is fine, but not something I want to be thinking about at a wedding. 

Anyway, when I was trying on wedding dresses, the consultant mentioned the dollar dance to me and I said "nope, not going to do that." Her response was"oh good! I just went to a wedding and learned about the dollar dance and watched it happen for the first time. It and the whole wedding was so tacky!"

I would think about that before doing it. It is likely that there will be guests at your wedding who will think the same thing, even if they never tell you to your face. And if your fiance desperately wants something like the dollar dance, do what PP suggested and instead of money use little notes with advice, or monopoly money, or recipes. 

QueerFemme

You can give people a turn to dance with you without making them pay for it.    Why not just get pole and stick it in the center of the dance floor?

People shouldn't have to pay to dance with the bride and groom.

NYCBruin

lilacck28 said:

If you have never heard of the dollar dance, then that means that there will probably be many guests of yours who have also never heard of the dollar dance. I had never heard of it before going on the knot, and I would be APPALLED to witness it in person. Well, more like very embarrassed for the couple. I agree with your earlier confusion-- it sounds like being a stripper. Which, if that is anyone's profession, that is fine, but not something I want to be thinking about at a wedding. 

Anyway, when I was trying on wedding dresses, the consultant mentioned the dollar dance to me and I said "nope, not going to do that." Her response was"oh good! I just went to a wedding and learned about the dollar dance and watched it happen for the first time. It and the whole wedding was so tacky!"

I would think about that before doing it. It is likely that there will be guests at your wedding who will think the same thing, even if they never tell you to your face. And if your fiance desperately wants something like the dollar dance, do what PP suggested and instead of money use little notes with advice, or monopoly money, or recipes. 

So much of the bolded.  If not for TK if I ever went to a wedding with a dollar dance, it would have been a major WTF/how tacky/is this a wedding or a fundraiser moment for me.

Although, if you really want to come up with an excuse to dance with your guests, I think an advice dance would be adorable.  Having no idea what a dollar dance is, I would think an advice dance was sweet. A dollar dance for monopoly money would equally confuse me (but would be less offensive).

csuave

Dollar dances are very common in my area and I am of Polish descent. We chose not to do one partly because we didn't want to "close down" the dance floor for as long as getting through a dollar dance would take. Instead we did a polka medley of our 4 favorite polka songs (the medley kept the total time shorter than playing 4 entire songs) to honor Polish tradition. When "Roll Out the Barrel" was played the dance floor was packed! We also spend a lot of time on the dance floor dancing with everyone and mingling in between.

Marzipan13

I'm from a Polish / Slovak family, and I remember going to ONE wedding YEARRRRSSS ago (seriously, 20 years ago) of my dad's goddaughter - they did the Dollar Dance, and even as a 4 year old, I thought it was super weird. 

As previously stated, it's a dying Polish tradition - not one worth keeping.  It's awkward and tacky nowadays.  

McCMal

My FI's cousin did this, and they did it kind of right in the middle of the dancing/party part, so we wanted to go dance, but they were doing the dollar dance for almost an hour. Constant prodding and calling for people to get in line from the DJ was a little extensive. We left shortly after, because we got tired of waiting to dance. 

I'm terrified that his other cousins are going to do this ball and chain thing they all do. They tackle the groom, padlock on a literal ball and chain, and ask people to bid to release him. I saw it once, and it was 20 minutes of the groom standing there awkwardly as people finally stood up and started offering hundreds of dollars. They got the groom with two balls and chains, on on each foot, to double the profits 

lilacck28

McCMal said:

My FI's cousin did this, and they did it kind of right in the middle of the dancing/party part, so we wanted to go dance, but they were doing the dollar dance for almost an hour. Constant prodding and calling for people to get in line from the DJ was a little extensive. We left shortly after, because we got tired of waiting to dance. 

I'm terrified that his other cousins are going to do this ball and chain thing they all do. They tackle the groom, padlock on a literal ball and chain, and ask people to bid to release him. I saw it once, and it was 20 minutes of the groom standing there awkwardly as people finally stood up and started offering hundreds of dollars. They got the groom with two balls and chains, on on each foot, to double the profits 

WTF. That's both tacky and offensive. 

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

McCMal said:

My FI's cousin did this, and they did it kind of right in the middle of the dancing/party part, so we wanted to go dance, but they were doing the dollar dance for almost an hour. Constant prodding and calling for people to get in line from the DJ was a little extensive. We left shortly after, because we got tired of waiting to dance. 

I'm terrified that his other cousins are going to do this ball and chain thing they all do. They tackle the groom, padlock on a literal ball and chain, and ask people to bid to release him. I saw it once, and it was 20 minutes of the groom standing there awkwardly as people finally stood up and started offering hundreds of dollars. They got the groom with two balls and chains, on on each foot, to double the profits 

Okay that's a new one.  And that's crazy!

Angusaur

I am polish and refuse to do the dollar dance! It's rude, and tacky. I don't care how many of my aunts, uncles, cousins who tell me I just HAVE to have one. Nope nope nope.

jenijoyk

I've been to several weddings in California where this is a thing. It's called the Money Dance as opposed to the Dollar Dance, and we both we were supposed to just stuff money into the brides' dress or the grooms' tux. Preeetttty weird. Needless to say, this will not happen at my wedding. And if anyone tries to stuff a bill down the front of my dress, they will probably end up with a shiner. 

Jen4948

McCMal said:

My FI's cousin did this, and they did it kind of right in the middle of the dancing/party part, so we wanted to go dance, but they were doing the dollar dance for almost an hour. Constant prodding and calling for people to get in line from the DJ was a little extensive. We left shortly after, because we got tired of waiting to dance. 

I'm terrified that his other cousins are going to do this ball and chain thing they all do. They tackle the groom, padlock on a literal ball and chain, and ask people to bid to release him. I saw it once, and it was 20 minutes of the groom standing there awkwardly as people finally stood up and started offering hundreds of dollars. They got the groom with two balls and chains, on on each foot, to double the profits 

That's disgusting.  I'd have security people or venue staff on hand to prevent them getting near the groom with a ball and chain.

Knottie04135568

Im gonna be another one to say I have been to several wedding with dollar dances as a guest and never found them rude or tacky. I thought they were cute and fun. Just my opinion, I never knew they were polish in origin, that's interesting to learn. If you and your fiancée agree to it, have fun!

holyguacamole79

Okay, don't hate on me; I wasn't around here when I planned our wedding. We did a dollar dance, and if I had to do it again, I absolutely would NOT. It just felt creepy the whole time, and each person got just a minute or so. I had to dance with some of my husband's creepy cousins as well as a douchey boyfriend of a guest. My husband & I had already made the rounds to greet our guests, and we were on the dance floor the whole night, so plenty of people got to dance with us. It really isn't worth it.

Michael2365

Well, this is a ritual in many cuthures.