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MONEY!!!!

Jen HaywardJen Hayward member
First Comment
in Rhode Island
WHat happends when your wedding is in 41 days an other things in your life come up an you run out of money for your wedding do you call it off what do you do.... then one of my grooms men said he cant do it my mom was paying for the flowers an now she cant ughhh sooo stress full any one have any ideas what i can do
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Re: MONEY!!!!

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    lwolf2001lwolf2001 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    can you take the rest of what you owe and pay with a credit card. And hopefully you will get money as gifts and be able to pay it off. how much do you have left to pay. Im running into the same situation with putting down deposits. My dad has not given me any money and i had to pay the vendors with checks. I took a cash advandce on one of my CC. i wouldnt cancel your day! what does your FI think?
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    Em&Jeff2009Em&Jeff2009 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That is terrible advice. Don't put anything on your credit card unless you know for SURE you can pay it off immediately. CC companies are jacking up interest rates before the new Obama plan goes into effect. Also never count on the money you might get as a gift. Have you already sent out invites? Can you scale back the number of people invited? Scale back the food, the flowers, do your own hair and makeup, have your RD at someone's house. There's a lot you can do. Next time you post, please re-read what you put up. You'll get better feedback that way.
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    Jen HaywardJen Hayward member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    ohh we did they with credit cards already :( he doesnt think we should call it off its the lil thigs we need to pay for like my hair ..the MH BM gifts his tux wedding favors ext.. an on top of all this he is leaving for the miltry soon so my stress level has gone UP
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    Jen HaywardJen Hayward member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    sorry i didnt re-read lol a good friend is doing make up i got my $100.00 wedding shoes for $16.00 dollers so i am trying to do cheep but still cute an to my likeings
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Well...  Emily is right.  A lot of little things can be skipped.  Hair is one of those things.  Get a friend to help.   It's time to make  cut backs and see what can be changed.  Don't give in to small details that you feel like you "have" to have when in reality, the wedding will go on just fine without them.   Prioritize - you'll figure out what to cut.
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    Em&Jeff2009Em&Jeff2009 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Something tells me you should skip the DIY programs...
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    RITobiRITobi member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Could you just get married at city hall, or a church (whatever your fancy) and put the reception on hold until he's back.
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    lwolf2001lwolf2001 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    sorry i didn't re-read my post. She asked for advise and thats what i did. I don't think its bad advise.
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    cherish105cherish105 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with Em, putting money on your CC is terrible advice, and NEVER EVER assume that you are going to get a certain amount(or anything) for gifts!Try to skip what you can manage to and what's not contracted.  The ONLY part that matters is that you have the marriage license and someone to perform the ceremony so you legally get married!!  The rest is just the wedding!!!
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    RITobiRITobi member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Lwolf - in this economy, with people losing there homes every single day because they over extended their credit and are losing jobs at historical rates, you think its good advise to tell someone who says they have no money for the wedding to put it down on credit?! Really?! REALLY?!
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Every girl dreams of her perfect wedding from the first time they see a bride. If by the time one reaches adulthood, they cannot see that the "wedding" is only a day.. That it is the vow you take that matters, we have lots of issues in the world. Seriously, if you can't do it to your liking, is that really a reason not to get married? Because you have to skip on the flowers and fancy favors and programs, little things that are great, but not needed to a MARRIAGE, you want to cancel your wedding?Really? Ditto previous posters. Don't put a wedding on credit.
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    Jen HaywardJen Hayward member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    ok first offf i am already married we got engaged in feb were planing on getting married may 22, 2010 but then he decided to join so we bumbed up the date to this october we met with our JP an set the date mailed invites out had family helping out with wedding then miltry told us to get married  before the real wedding so we did an that was the most amazing thing saying I DO  to my fi but .... no one knows in our family so we still have to have the reall wedding....   some family members  would be very up set... i like nice things but a wedding reception to me is a waste of money i rather be on a nice honeymoon with my hubby then some bolwn out wedding day so its not like i am spending all this crazy kind of money on my BIG Dayy its ever girls dream to have a nice day to remember for the rest of her life so thanks for all the advice girls !!!!!
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    aliciaandbrianaliciaandbrian member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Its MILITARY. 
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    MrsDtoBe2009MrsDtoBe2009 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    There's no way this chick is for real LOL.
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    Jen HaywardJen Hayward member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    wow didnt realize how bitchy you girls could be. Isnt this web site for help not criticize others ......
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We're trying to help you a. learn how to spell, b. understand grammar, and c. not get into debt over a wedding when YOU ARE ALREADY MARRIED!!
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    melinda478melinda478 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yes but did you ever learn how to spell? Tough to answer you when my eyes are going crazy with your spelling mistakes and run on sentances.
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    RITobiRITobi member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You will learn that people are more than willing to help; however, when they spend most of their time trying to figure out what your problem is, they spend far less thinking about solutions. Consider using punctuation and a dictionary for spelling. 
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    scubascaffscubascaff member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Honestly, I initially passed over the post because I couldnt get through the first sentence...
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    Dannie138Dannie138 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Wow... I have to agree, a lot of you are making really rude remarks. Maybe because I'm a reading specialist, I really have no problems understanding it if I TRY. Seriously, instead of bashing this girls writing ability, if you can't say anything nice why even respond? The girl comes on here, asking for advice and this is what happens? I work with kids that always have people criticizing their abilities, when it is the BEST they can do...
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Dannie, we're all adults here, right? We're all reading specialists? If you can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen. We all posted our suggestions and advice and it wasn't good enough for her, or evidently you. You're a reading specialist so analyze this: we're not dumb. Where is your good advice?
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    Dannie138Dannie138 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Wow, you must be under a lot of stress to react like that. I'm simply saying that not everyone can read or write as well as others. If some people on here are going to be as ignorant as some of you all seem to be...well, then I feel bad. What if that was YOUR child who was going through life having people make rude comments?
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hahahaha... Unborn children getting into this? They have learning issues, I get them a tutor. This is the knot, not the UN. We're aloud to be biotches if we want to. And I am not stressed. The true insult is "maybe that's the best she could do." What an underhanded, uppity comment on your part.
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    danamarie421danamarie421
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Maybe you should postpone the wedding & reception until after your FI (or secret husband...lol) gets back from serving.  This will give you some time to save money and to decide if you really want to do a big event.  It sounds like the wedding would be more for your friends and family at this point.  I'm sure that they would completely understand if you had to push things back a bit.   I absolutely agree with the others that you should never put yourself into debt for a wedding.  That's just not the best way to start off your lives together.  As far as posting, it can get a bit frustrating to read a post that has a ton of mis-spellings, etc.  I can tell you that I'm not the best speller... I've gotten into the habit of spell checking everything in MS Word or Outlook.  You'll find that everyone on here really does want to help when it comes down to it.  Good Luck!
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    Dannie138Dannie138 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Just like you were entitled to say what you think, so am I. And actually, I have children. If someone made a comment like that directed towards my own children, or my students, I would have something to say right back. My comment isn't uppity...it's the sheer fact that you will encounter people in your life that reading and writing isn't a strong suit. If you want to sit there and tell people that have literacy issues to get a dictionary...then you are indeed being a biotch.
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    How mean of you to be calling me a biotch. I am a biotch specialist and I take SERIOUS offense to that, in the name of all biotches.
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    Jen HaywardJen Hayward member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    THank you Dannie138 Yes i am a very bad speller i am sorry for ones who cant understand my spelling. I try to do my best i come on here for help an alot of you gave me some very good advise ... puttin of the wedding wont help after BT me an him will be moving .... also lot of family members have got there plane tikets just need to find things cheep lol i guess
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Some good ways to cut costs: Get a family member, or friend to do your hair or makeup. The little touches? Buy a pack of cardstock at staples and get to DIYing. Cutting costs low won't make it any less special. And yes, we are always here for helping. Just trying to help you get the best answers possible.
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    lwolf2001lwolf2001 member
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    edited December 2011
    People on this board are rude! I would never recommend anyone to the knot. Does anyone have anything better to do then sit at work and go on the knot? Jen where is your wedding?
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    shanlubeyshanlubey
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I've been away from the knot for a while, but I find it important to better the future of RI brides with my sometimes advice/snarkiness.
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