What would your preference be?

ftrmrsw

Trying to decide 

A - How much of each item I need and

B - Which is better cupcakes or cake and further to that, Cupcakes or Minis. (Minis are usually more coveted at the office, would a wedding be the same?)

zantster

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:1388ebda-5d01-4714-a3e2-2dfbb1725a47">Re:What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]I am not a fan of cupcakes at formal events. I feel ridiculous eating a finger food with a fork but also hate eating something covered in icing with my hands while being dressed up. Also, the cake to icing ratio is all off in a cupcake, so, I have to cut it in half horizontally and then either sandwich it or redistribute the icing to both pieces. Cupcakes at weddings is a trend I cannot wait to see fall by the wayside. My vote is cake all the way. ETA: as far as how much, I would go with 2 slices of cake per guest because what the bakery counts as a slice is tiny, 1 reg cupcake per guest plus 20 percent extra in case someone wants a second, or 3 to 4 mini cupcakes per guest.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

This!  Maybe it's a holdover from my childhood or I've got a touch of special snowflake-itis but I can't help but associate cupcakes with birthday parties, school bake sales and the like.  It just doesn't seem to fit at a formal wedding to me no matter how they stack them and frost them.  I looove seeing and eating a real wedding cake and watching the couple cut it together for the first time, and not just the honorary small piece of cake at the top of a cupcake tower.

cwaggoner07

I agree, I hate cupcakes for weddings, even though I LOVE them in real life. I am a purist about a few things with weddings, and a frosted white cake is one of them.

But as a guest, I'm not going to outwardly complain about having a cupcake, and I would probably enjoy it. It just seems so out of place. Plus, cupcakes don't have the flavored filling that a lot of wedding cakes have.

HobokensFury

What Stage said.

I feel like cupcakes are for birthday parties, not weddings.

entropicbeauty

I loved having cupcakes for my wedding - but my wedding wasn't exactly formal, so there's that.

I like that I was able to have 6 distinct flavors of cupcakes and they were visually different enough that guests could tell the difference and make a selection based on their personal taste preferences.

J&K10910

I don't like cake, but I do like cupcakes.  I think because cupcakes in general are easier to get rid of some of the frosting (and the entire thing isn't covered like a lot of cakes) and cupcakes tend to be far less dry. 

I like the idea of mini cupcakes so that guests can have more than flavor if you do multiples.  I also like it because I can't usually eat a whole cupcake, so minis are more portion friendly.

Out of your options, I'd prefer pie the most, but I don't think most people would.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:dedeabab-d040-4c57-b6ff-e2ba2f9bb909">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : I completely agree.  I can take or leave cake but put a cupcake in front of me and it will look like this within seconds I don't have a preference between cupcakes and mini cupcakes.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

Right there with you.  There is just something about having a small little cake all to myself, just makes it that much better.

Sassenach1743

I'm definitely in the cake camp! For me, weddings are formal events and a traditional cake with gourmet fillings and luxurious frosting is what I love to see... and eat! 

Also, even though I don't mind a good cupcake on a normal day or for birthdays and such... I absolutely can't stand the sight of a cupcake tower at a wedding. Ick! Not formal enough for me, sorry. 

znd13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:1388ebda-5d01-4714-a3e2-2dfbb1725a47">Re:What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE] Cupcakes at weddings is a trend I cannot wait to see fall by the wayside. My vote is cake all the way.
<div>
</div><div>Yes. That is me. I hate cup cakes at weddings!</div>

ftrmrsw

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:8f559995-1297-4d9a-8648-44ffe6076c1b">Re:What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:What would your preference be? : [QUOTE] Cupcakes at weddings is a trend I cannot wait to see fall by the wayside. My vote is cake all the way. Yes. That is me. I hate cup cakes at weddings!
Posted by znd13[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Its so interesting to read everyones comments and how people's opinions vary so much. </div><div>
</div><div>I'm in the cupcake boat, because I seriously just love cupcakes. I dont know. They make me happy!</div><div>
</div><div>Its funny thought, 11 years ago when I was organizing my highschool prom, we decided it would be "so different and fun" to do cupcakes instead of cake. It was before cupcakes became trendy and it was such a big deal, everyone loved them. 11 years later they are trendy, cupcake shops opening on every corner.</div><div>
</div><div>But.... Trendy or not.... I love me a good cupcake!</div>

Peledreamsofrain

I'm not a fan of cupcakes at weddings for several reasons. 

The first is how difficult they are to eat without getting coated in frosting.  Even if you try to eat it with a fork, you first have to peel the paper off with your hands.  Then you must choose between wiping the icing off on a napkin that will go back into your lap and wait there like a frosting landmine to smear on your dress, or choose to lick your fingers like a barbarian at a formal event. (or at least that's how I feel).

The second reason is that I feel cake is a socially special item.  Cupcakes are kind of an every day thing, like sneakers.  But cake is for special occasions and life events.  It feels more formal and more 'special' to me.  And most people have been socially conditioned that way (remember how special and wonderful birthday cake was when you were little?).

But, all that being said, I don't poo poo at people who do decide to have cupcakes at their wedding.  It's just not my thing.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:b7781658-ae56-4a30-8bd1-ada0e4571dac">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : If you have cupcakes every day I want your life. <strong>Am I the only one that doesn't get messy when I eat cupcakes?</strong>  I find they are much easier to eat without making a mess than cake.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

No you aren't.  In fact I just ate a cupcake (got to love work provided lunches) and besides a tiny spec of icing on my pointer finger when peeling off the wrapper I was completely mess free.

I just think it is weird that people are ok with BBQ at weddings but not ok with cupcakes because they are messy.  I would think eating ribs and chicken wings would be a heck of a lot messier then a cupcake.

Peledreamsofrain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:29e80f16-8b2a-4027-9893-3132cd74cdba">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : No you aren't.  In fact I just ate a cupcake (got to love work provided lunches) and besides a tiny spec of icing on my pointer finger when peeling off the wrapper I was completely mess free. I just think it is weird that people are ok with BBQ at weddings but not ok with cupcakes because they are messy.  I would think eating ribs and chicken wings would be a heck of a lot messier then a cupcake.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

<div align="left">In my defense, I hate BBQ and chicken wings for the same reason.  I have been known to try to eat them with a fork :P.  Our caterer wasn't even halfway through suggesting it when I was like 'nooooo!".

And I'm like Stage, cupcake frosting is magnetically attracted to my clothing and hands.  I think it's a conspiracy, personally.  Like they come up with a gameplan first:

"Red sprinkles, you suicide dive down her shirt!  Blue sprinkles, you dive the other way so she jerks her hand to catch you.  Frosting.. dive dive DIVE!"</div>

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:8e81caf6-962d-4f12-8265-e2c43ccc40c6">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : In my defense, I hate BBQ and chicken wings for the same reason.  I have been known to try to eat them with a fork :P.  Our caterer wasn't even halfway through suggesting it when I was like 'nooooo!". And I'm like Stage, cupcake frosting is magnetically attracted to my clothing and hands.  I think it's a conspiracy, personally.  Like they come up with a gameplan first:<strong> "Red sprinkles, you suicide dive down her shirt!  Blue sprinkles, you dive the other way so she jerks her hand to catch you.  Frosting.. dive dive DIVE!"
</strong>Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

LOL!  I guess since I have eaten so many cupcakes in my lifetime (God I love those little suckers!) that I have become a professional cupcake eater.  The only time I may have a slight slip up is if there is filling in the cupcake that I am unaware of but I quickly regain my composure and chomp on :)

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:9c5c5c1d-1625-44d6-b58a-40ee7c615718">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : I'd like to know who these people are because they deserve a good flaming.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

Many times, not just on this board but others, brides say they are having BBQ for their wedding food.  You don't really hear too much complaining about mess, but rather the choice of food sounds delish, at least the one's I have read.

Any type of food can be messy.  So we found out that some people can't eat a cupcake without getting it all over themselves.  Others may not be able to eat pasta without splattering sauce down their front.  Some may not be able to eat a BBQ sanwhich without half of it dropping into their laps.  Heck sometimes I can't eat a piece of chicken with a fork without it falling into my lap.  Just becasue something is eaten with a fork doesn't mean that it can't be just as messy as something eaten with your hands.

If people start concerning themselves so much over mess then guests will have to start drinking out of sippy cups and not be allowed to eat anything because someone might get it on their face, hands or clothes.

HobokensFury

All I have to say is you ladies are making me crave cupcakes right now.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:3c7dd45c-a604-46df-b1a3-56e3646357b0">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : We were asked OUR PREFERENCE.  We expressed it and gave reasons.  I often would prefer something other than what is served at local weddings.  It doesn't mean I pitch a fit or refuse to eat or think the bride and groom are awful hosts.  It's just my preference.  You can call me a hypocrite all you want, but stop acting like I'm demanding sippy cups and bibs for everyone. And as for BBQ, you do realize that BBQ is more than ribs, right?  Yes, I think chicken over the coals, brisket, or even pulled pork sound tasty for a wedding.  All three are typically eaten with a fork, none automatically include sauce.  Wings on the other hand, are almost never classified as actual BBQ and I dislike them at formal events for the same reasons as a cupcake. Edited to remove the first line which made no sense.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

I just felt like some of the previous posts were all about how messy cupcakes were.  I just pointed out that all food could be messy in their own way.  I never said that you were asking for bibs and sippy cups, I was merely saying that if people (in general, not just you) get themselves overly worked up or concerned over messiness then that is eventually where it will lead.

And yes I know that BBQ contains more then just ribs.  Excuse me for not naming all the types of BBQ there is out in the world.  I figured doing so would take up a lot of space.  And again, all the other BBQ you named could be messy because even eaten with a fork gravity could take over and a piece of brisket could fall in your lap.


I also gave my preference and expressed that I don't agree with your thinking that cupcakes are all that messy.  Sorry I don't agree with you on this one.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:dbd8fb71-981c-4d43-8d43-561b9c91ca0c">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : Your logic is flawed for a number of reasons 1. <strong> I have in fact seen more than one person on this board tell a bride that wants BBQ it's messy and as a guest they would prefer not to eat it at a formal wedding due to the messiness. </strong>2.  You said "I just think it is weird that people are ok with BBQ at weddings but not ok with cupcakes because they are messy." which means that the same people who are complaining about cupcakes being messy are okay with BBQ at a wedding.  <strong>Are you keeping a spreadsheet of which posters do not like BBQ at weddings due to the mess (and which are okay with it)  and also of those who don't like cupcakes at weddings due to the mess (and which are okay with it)?  Which user names appear on both the okay with messy BBQ weddings spreadsheet as well as the Not okay with messy cupcake weddings spreadsheet?  THOSE are the people I will search for and flame because that's asinine.  Can you please provide me with a Venn diagram?</strong> 3.  OP asked which people would prefer cupcakes or cake.  People were responding to that question when they said they prefer cake because cupcakes are messy.  That doesn't mean they don't think cupcakes are "delish".  <strong>If OP had said "I'm ordering cupcakes for my wedding is that okay?" most of these responses would likely be "sure, do what you want.  Cupcakes are 'delish.'"</strong>  When offered a choice people will make a choice and provide an explanation for why.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

1) Well I guess I just haven't read the same one's as you.  This does not mean my logic is flawed because I am basing my logic off what I have read only.

2) I keep separate excel spreadsheets for each day that I am on TK.  At the end of the month I generate a report so that I can easily refer back to what was said.  But a venn diagram, that is asking a bit much.

3) I believe (my opinion of course) that if the OP said I am ordering cupcakes is that ok, she would have gotten the same responses as in this thread.  Posters generally express their own preferences when answering questions.  I am sure somewhere a long the way someone would have said "Sure that is fine but I prefer regular cake over cupcakes because they are too messy."  You have been on these boards long enough to know that she would not have gotten a simple "Sure" as an answer without further opinion being expressed in regards to her choice.

Peledreamsofrain

I'm fond of sippy cups.....

cwaggoner07

God, I want some BBQ right now.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:c33fa29a-5c04-48ba-83b1-f42b2ebd7aa2">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : It's not that you don't agree with me, Maggie, it's that you're making asinine statements and talking down to me, then accusing me of getting "worked up" because I pointed out the flaw in your argument.   We get it, you are just as likely to dump a salad in your lap as you are to get icing on your face while eating a cupcake.  Okay.  But saying I or we are getting "so worked up" when YOU are the one going off on how every food you eat COULD be messy is just silly. Eating with your hands is categorically messier than eating with utensils.  I'm not talking about fear of accidentally dropping stuff on my dress, I'm talking about trying to carry on a conversation with my dinner companions at a formal function while I wipe or lick icing or sauce off of my face and hands kind of messy.  
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

I never said or accused you of getting "worked up".  I was making a general statement of people, meaning everyone in the whole entire world, not specifically you.  There are some brides out there that may take the issue of messiness to a whole other level and I was merely pointing out that overthinking things could lead to some craziness.  I agree that when picking foods and desserts you should consider the messiness factor, but there are some people (again, meaning in general not anyone specifically) that could take that thinking and run with it.  All I was trying to say is that all foods could be messy thus when picking foods that shouldn't be the main concern.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:ce58fbeb-8320-44e7-961c-d1cc13ac1691">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : I would like a copy of your report please.  I will create my own Venn Diagram and send it back to you so you can have it ready at a moment's notice in case this comes up again. And now everyone go answer my poll.  I MUST KNOW WHO YOU ARE!
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

I will post it on my cube wall so it is in plain view.  But one request, could you make it in the shape of a cupcake?

mcda04

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:7bc4c0ec-9b9c-463e-9700-2366077974bc">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]Me eating a cupcake.  Every.  Time.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]
This made me LOL. kinda snorted a little

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:d76aceb1-cd72-4de6-a2d7-5dec16e8ab68">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : I will use a cupcake on the cupcake side and a chicken leg on the BBQ side. Stupid knot!  Cupcake IS a word!
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

Ooh I like that.  The only downside, this diagram will now make me hungry all of the time!

And TK said cupcake wasn't a word?  Really?  Got to love TK, always exciting!

ftrmrsw

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:6c55f02c-a3b2-41a4-b85f-48a564421dca">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : LOL!  I guess since I have eaten so many cupcakes in my lifetime (God I love those little suckers!) that I have become a professional cupcake eater.  The only time I may have a slight slip up is if there is filling in the cupcake that I am unaware of but I quickly regain my composure and chomp on :)
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

<div>hahah  I feel like we could be friends... </div>

rajahmd

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:d76aceb1-cd72-4de6-a2d7-5dec16e8ab68">Re: What would your preference be?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: What would your preference be? : I will use a cupcake on the cupcake side and a chicken leg on the BBQ side. <strong>Stupid knot!  Cupcake IS a word</strong>!
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

<div>This has been a fascinating conversation to follow.  But I have to say the bolded line just killed me. So much laughter.  I loved it.  Thank you for sharing that.</div>

zantster

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_what-would-your-preference-be?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1c3e59ca-5b9b-48a0-bd9b-1b5fe76a6523Post:6eb78350-1dd9-49dd-aa91-6fd5ab04191e"><u><font color="#0000ff">Re: What would your preference be?</font></u></a>:
[QUOTE]I'm definitely in the cake camp! For me, weddings are formal events and a traditional cake with gourmet fillings and luxurious frosting is what I love to see... and eat!  Also, even though I don't mind a good cupcake on a normal day or for birthdays and such... I absolutely can't stand the sight of a cupcake tower at a wedding. Ick! Not formal enough for me, sorry. 
Posted by brita722[/QUOTE]

FI likes pie.  But I like this way of explaining things as well. There is something I've always liked about the anticipation of entering the reception and seeing the wedding cake in the center of the room that has been layered, filled, frosted, painstakingly decorated like a work of art and put on display.  There's usually at least three layers, which is not an everyday creation for the average person. On the other hand, people bring cupcakes to my job and church functions and other places frequently.  The only difference at weddings has been the way that they're put on top of a tower instead of the usual side by side on a table.  So when I see cupcakes at a wedding I'm not as excited.  They have always been a much more common sighting and indulgence for me than a wedding cake so that's why they don't strike me as very formal or interesting.  But many brides are not prioritizing a formal wedding nowadays.  So I am only speaking of formal weddings. 

ftrmrsw

Wow, this thread got alot more interesting than I could have imagined.

I do LOVE cupcakes, probably more than I should, which is why I was asking what other people would prefer.  It does seem the majority would prefer cake over cupcakes, and your points do all make sense.

On the cupcake front, I've heard MANY people say no one ate their wedding "CAKE" and they were eating it for a month but on the flip side, there were no cupcakes left. I leads me to believe while messy perhaps cupcakes are "easier". 

Yes it might not be so classy to get icing on your face or fingers.. but after a few to many drinks, whos really worried about being classy? And if you are... Have another drink. I think people are more inclinded to walk by and swipe a cupcake, than they are to sit down with a piece of cake. (Do people eat cake standing?)

Anyway, thanks alot everyone for your opinions. I really did want preferences and "cake" seems to be the most preferred. I'll definitely keep that in mind. 

EDIT: In a completely unrelated topic - I once sent an entire chicken breast flying, while eating it with a knife and fork. Sometimes these things just can't be avoided!

Maggie0829

Thank you for the diagram Linger, but to get a true record, you would need to poll each and every board on this forum as well as each and every user.

But that chicken looks mighty tasty.

Maggie0829

I'm trying to load it but at 450GB it is taking awhile.

Maggie0829

I may have joined in '09 but I didn't start posting on these boards (or even looking around)until about a month or so before my wedding in July 2011.