Asian Weddings

Anyone planning an interracial wedding?

Hi, my FI is Korean-American (parents grew up in Seoul) and I am Bolivian/Mexican-American (mom is from Bolivia). I am trying to incorporate both cultural traditions, but I'm not sure where to start. So far we have decided to do the paebaek ceremony after the church ceremony. The wedding is in LA and we will be serving Korean food from Koreatown. Is anyone else in an interracial relationship? How are you incorporating cultural ideas for your wedding? Thanks!

Re: Anyone planning an interracial wedding?

  • rbtrumpetrbtrumpet member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am caucasian, FI is chinese (came over when he was 10).  He does not want a lot of Chinese tradition in the ceremony, but we are incorporating it into the reception.

    I'm having a traditional (european?  American?  mid-west?), formal ceremony.

    Then we are doing a cinese banquet with chinese themes for the reception. 

    His only request was that I change into the qipao at the reception, which I think will be fun! 

    But yeah, basically just asked him what he wanted, and am putting in what I want.
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  • ren6121ren6121 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am Italian, German, and French and my fiance is from Trinidad. We have been trying very hard to incorporate our cultures into the wedding.  I am mostly Italian so, I have gone with that.  For theTrinidad/Bronx side we plan on hiring  Tassa drummers and a doo-wop group which specialize in singing songs from the movie Bronxtale.  We have also been fortunate enough to have a cattering hall which could weave in some food with a west Indian flair.  As for my side, we will be getting married on a Sunday, which is the luckiest day for a bride to get married in Italy.  So, I wanted to include this information in our programs.  We will also infuse the Italian culture through food and music.

  • edited December 2011
    I am American, and my FI is Korean (adopted by Korean mother, American father at 3 months and brought to USA from Seoul). FI's mother has passed away, and he is not that into his Korean heritage, but I would like to incorporate some Korean traditions. I don't know what we will be doing yet, as he has turned his nose up at everything I have suggested so far...
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  • edited December 2011
    I am Vietnamese American, and the groom is German German.  All written materials from the invitations to the programs (detailed, because every tradition will need to be explained) to the menus will be in three languages.  I want our two MCs to teach the whole reception how to say "cheers!" in every language. 
  • crislencrislen member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am!

    I'm Canadian and he is Chinese/Vietnamese Canadian.

    We're doing a cruise wedding as a way to easily combine the 2 families (if we do an at-home wedding, one side will want a big seafood buffet or 12 course asian meal and my side will not eat anything with seafood in it and well.. that isn't going to happen!!)

    Neither of my fi's sisters did anything asian in their weddings, but since he is the oldest son and everything that goes with it, we are going to incorporate the traditional tea ceremony.  I have yet to decide whether to wear a qipao or not for it.  (although, living in Vancouver, I doubt I could even find one in my size!)
  • edited December 2011
    I am Vietnamese/French/American and my FI is Italian/American.  We're just going with the flow and doing what is accepted norm for the average American, as that is the only culture we have in common.  :-)  

    Doing it in traditional Vietnamese would involve quite a bit of ceremony which would involve me taking him to a Buddhist temple.  Doing it traditional Italian means I have to go the Roman Catholic (his family is Catholic) route and spend months going to classes and learning about how to be a Catholic.  Neither options seemed really desirable, so we're just doing it vanilla Americana.   
  • edited December 2011
    I'm African American and my FI is Chinese/Korean. I'd love to do something special for the two sides of his family, and include a lot of cultural things from my side. We're both the first in our family out of our parent's children getting married, so the pressure is on, or at least I feel like it. Is there anything special that I need to do?
  • unplainjaneunplainjane member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    i am chinese/vietnamese and my fiance is eastern european catholic. so we will be having a church ceremony for his side where i'll be wearing a white wedding gown and during the cocktail reception we will be having a chinese tea ceremony for my side. i will be changing into a qipao for the tea ceremony which my fiance thinks is awesome. then after we're having a vineyard style dinner reception where i'll change back into my wedding gown which is something not cultural for us but is very much our style.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm Korean and my FI is white.  We are also having our wedding in Los Angeles and we've decided to do our Paebek during our rehearsal dinner at a Korean restaurant in Ktown the night before.  The actual wedding will be American style.  My FMOL got fitted for a hanbok and everyone is real excited.  It's like having two weddings!
  • edited December 2011
    I'm white and my FI is Vietnamese. He grew up in the U.S. but moved to the U.S. from Vietnam at 6 months old. We are doing the traditional American ceremony and skipping the Vietnamese tea ceremony. At the reception, we will have a band that plays American and Vietnamese songs. We will have a mainly Asian-inspired menu but American cakes. We will have the Vietnamese tradition of cognac of each of the tables but have some wine avaiable. (I'm not a "yak" fan!) We will also have an MC who speaks both Vietnamese and English. We may even give our guests Vietnamese-themed wedding favors but we are still working on that. I thought about wearing and ao dai but my FI isn't doing it so I don't think I'm going to do it now.
    We are also incorporating a Vietnamese tradition of taking a picture with each of our guests and then printing those and putting them in the thank-you notes we send as an additional favor.
    The invitations has been the most difficult part of incorporating the cultures. His parents wanted to send bilingual invitations to everyone (140 of our guests are American; 130 of our guests are Vietnamese/American and some may struggle speaking and reading English). I wanted to send just the bilingual to the Vietnamese/Americans and English only to the non-Vietnamese speakers. The bilingual invites are very difficult to read! I think we struck a compromise and are doing bilingual for our bilingual guests and English only for our non-Vietnamese guests.
  • amlowamlow member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am Chinese American and my FI is Anglo American. I really wanted to merge some of my Chinese culture in to our wedding. The invitations have a gold "love" symbol and the theme of the wedding is asian. It has been really fun planning and collecting items like our red envelopes to give out to guests as favors, that will have chocolate coins in them as a surprise.
  • edited December 2011
    I am Italian/German marrying a Korean American. His family is from Seoul Korea as well. I am in search my self on bringing the mix together in a tasteful outdoor wedding in WV. If you find anything out, please let me know as well I will help you too.
  • edited December 2011
    I am American of Scottish/English descent, and FI is from Goa in India.  It's been an interesting mix for us, as his culture is not what people typically think of as "Indian"--he's Catholic, as am I, and his culture has a lot of Portuguese influence (the part of India he's from was visited by Portuguese missionaries a few hundred years ago).  So most of the actual wedding traditions are the same, because they come from the church.  Our biggest challenge so far has been trying to come up with a menu that my relatives will eat (not too spicy) and his relatives will not think is too bland (just spicy enough)!!!
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  • FutureMrsLeFutureMrsLe member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm white and my FI is Vietnamese. He came to the US at 15. His family is still very traditional and we're going with the Vietnamese theme. I'm going to wear an Ao Dai for the ceremony and change into a different one for the wedding. I'm so excited. :)
  • kpwedkkkpwedkk member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_asian-weddings_anyone-planning-interracial-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:663Discussion:e7132edd-2eef-4943-a40e-3f326353dd16Post:efc24459-d972-475c-bc9d-4f9e97780426">Re: Anyone planning an interracial wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am Italian, German, and French and my fiance is from Trinidad. We have been trying very hard to incorporate our cultures into the wedding.  I am mostly Italian so, I have gone with that.  <strong>For theTrinidad/Bronx side we plan on hiring  Tassa drummers and a doo-wop group which specialize in singing songs from the movie Bronxtale.  We have also been fortunate enough to have a cattering hall which could weave in some food with a west Indian flair</strong>.  As for my side, we will be getting married on a Sunday, which is the luckiest day for a bride to get married in Italy.  So, I wanted to include this information in our programs.  We will also infuse the Italian culture through food and music.
    Posted by ren6121[/QUOTE]

    I'm West Indian :) If you need help, let me know!! In New York, there's a lot of Guyanese/Trinidadian food places :) (for catering)  Also you can get dalpuri made to order :)

    To reply to the thread, I am 5th generation North Indian, my parents are Guyanese and Trinidad - West Indian from the Caribbean.  My DH is South Indian, from India (first generation).  We did a fusion wedding incorporating key cultural and traditional aspects from the North and South Indian types of weddings, and adding Caribbean style flavors.

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  • edited December 2011
    I am Japanese/German, my FI is Eastern European. I came to the US at a very young age, and he has been in the US for the last ten years. Since we are both very close to our cultures, we are mixing traditions!

    For the ceremony, we are going with the American-style. We'll also be including some Lithuanian traditions (he gets to chop wood, and I get to put a diaper on a baby doll). During the dinner of the reception, we are going to change into traditional Japanese attire. I will be in a Kimono and he will be in Kimono/hakama. After dinner, I think there is a good chance that we'll be changing back into more comfortable attire.. I don't think we'll be able to dance with everyone if I am stiff as a board! Haha! Lithuanian weddings are traditionally a three-day event... We'll be cutting that down to two days! ;D
  • kpwedkk said:

    In Response to Re: Anyone planning an interracial wedding?:

    I am Italian, German, and French and my fiance is from Trinidad. We have been trying very hard to incorporate our cultures into the wedding.  I am mostly Italian so, I have gone with that.  For theTrinidad/Bronx side we plan on hiring  Tassa drummers and a doo-wop group which specialize in singing songs from the movie Bronxtale.  We have also been fortunate enough to have a cattering hall which could weave in some food with a west Indian flair.  As for my side, we will be getting married on a Sunday, which is the luckiest day for a bride to get married in Italy.  So, I wanted to include this information in our programs.  We will also infuse the Italian culture through food and music.
    Posted by ren6121
    I'm West Indian :) If you need help, let me know!! In New York, there's a lot of Guyanese/Trinidadian food places :) (for catering)  Also you can get dalpuri made to order :)

    To reply to the thread, I am 5th generation North Indian, my parents are Guyanese and Trinidad - West Indian from the Caribbean.  My DH is South Indian, from India (first generation).  We did a fusion wedding incorporating key cultural and traditional aspects from the North and South Indian types of weddings, and adding Caribbean style flavors.

    I am Italian American and my fiancé is Trini. We are doing two ceremonies (one hindu, one catholic) and one big reception. I will be wearing two outfits! Very excited about that. We are also definitely looking for a West Indian DJ and Tassa band so we can have both Trini and American music at the wedding. (And I just love Tassa!). Does anyone know any good. West Indian DJs in the New York/New Jersey area??
  • I have no idea why it quoted only half of the above.. Sorry about that, kpwedkk!
  • I'm Laos and Thai. My FI is Caucasian and Mexican. We are doing the traditional American wedding but want to incorporate the food. I just have a feeling my side of the family isn't going to enjoy my wedding because it's not the traditional Laos style.
  • My FI is half Japanese (moved to America when he was 7), and I'm lucky enough to get along very well with his family. My family (all caucasian), would love to see what a Japanese Ceremony looks like, but his Mom (Japanese) wants to see what an American Wedding looks like! We are thus compromising by having it predominately American (unfortunately, since I wanted to wear a Kimono somehow), with some Japanese elements in the decorations and perhaps doing the san-san-kudo in the ceremony. We are also having sushi for an appetizer and the main dish will be baked Teriyaki Chicken (chosen by FI, not me haha).
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