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WWYD? Long

Ok, I know what I want to do but I want to know what other people would do - Im starting to wonder if Im just being a b*tch about it... Over a year ago, both sets of parents were asked for a list of guests - family & friends they want at the wedding.  Since then, my parents have added quite a few couples (friends of theirs) that HAVE to be there, including their real estate agent in NY, and a few people they have not seen since moving to DE.  My parents have 34% of the guest list, again - includes family & friends.  A good portion of them Im sure will not come (since they are in NY or CA and cant afford to travel) but they will have quite a bit of family & friends there.FIL's have 22% of the guest list, and that is all family and 2 couples that are friends of theirs.A few weeks back, my mom helped with the invitations, and she got to see the whole list, and even though she has more people on her side, shes decided that she doesnt have enough...  Because most of Tonys family is pretty local and they will be coming, their side will have more people.  Now, shes on a mission to get me to add their neighbors - people they have had dinner with a few times, Tony & I have never met.  At 6 weeks out - shes insisting they get a invite.  Honestly - theyve been friends for a few months tops, T & I have never met them, I say no.  $300 for a couple that honestly dont mean anything to us.   Shes gone as far as telling me to skip inviting C & M because they are no longer friends (not an option - they received a STD & M was invited to my shower).  Also, my sis just got engaged a few months back and is now asking for a list of people - the couple was not on her list and she asked about it and was told by my dad "oh dont worry about them - we probably wont be friends with them next May!"  So why do WE HAVE to invite them, since they are SUCH CLOSE friends??FWIW, my parents are not contributing to the wedding.At first Tony and I were both NO - defiantely not.  Now Tonys saying just invite them - avoid the drama, and dont cause hard feelings over 2 more people.  My stance is neither of us know them, why do I have to spend $300 I dont have for people I dont know, that probably wont be friends with my parents next year (obviously my parents are "difficult" and go through friends often).WWYD?  Suck it up and invite them, or stand your ground and dont?

Re: WWYD? Long

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    amlinton1615amlinton1615 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ugh, that is a tough situation.  I'm with you on not wanting to invite them.  My parents did this to me as well and didn't contribute to the wedding and it really pi$$ed me off.  In the end, I was like whatever and sent the invite just to avoid the drama.  This person accepted and then didn't show.  I was beyond furious.  If I had to do it again, I would have stuck with my gut and not invited the extras.  And in your case $300 is a lot of money for people that you haven't met and mean nothing to you and Tony.GL!
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    edited December 2011
    I agree with you. I wouldn't invite them. honestly the day is about YOU. Which in my mind is you have veto power, plus you can't invite everyone. Tell your mom for budget reasons, you can't invite them. This worked with my best friends mom, who wanted to invite almost all of her co-workers to my friends wedding! ( my best friend had never met ANY of the10 ppl her mom wanted to invite.
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    MrsJax09MrsJax09 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would tell mom that if she is really worried about even aisles she should have seen my wedding! LOL. But seriously though, it is too close to the wedding to be adding people that were not budgeted for during the last few years. If she would like to hand over the money for their meals/favors/etc then fine, but otherwise NOPE! Too bad so sad.
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    edited December 2011
    lol, steph, i guess all 3 of us are b*itchs
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    MrsJax09MrsJax09 member
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    edited December 2011
    you know it!!
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    edited December 2011
    haha Beth :)  Its so annoying!  Ive tried the whole budget thing with her - it doesnt work, Im not sure how it doesnt...  She knows were not exactly rolling in $!  And seriously, they have 34% of the guest list!  Plenty will come!  ughhhh
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    edited December 2011
    I don't think you're being a b*tch, I wouldn't invite these people either.  My ILs contributed a nice chunk to our wedding, but we still put our foot down on the guest list and said we didn't want anyone there that DH or I didn't know personally - otherwise my MIL would have invited her entire tennis club, book club, neighbors at their beach house, a lesbian couple she knows in Australia, etc.  Honestly, you have so little time on your wedding day to spend with the people you know and care about, why waste any of that time with people you and your parents barely know?  I would stand your ground - six months from now your mom probably won't even care that they weren't invited!
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