ummm selfish much?

Nicmorrison14

I LOVE house hunters! I agree. Being in the chicagoland area some of the houses are super expensive and some are decently priced. Sometimes I see a house that's about 3,000 sf for $200k down south and I want to throw up. You couldn't get anywhere near that here. I agree about the location though. It's crazy how much things fluctuate

FiancB

Anybody watch House Hunters International and notice there are some crazy insanely fancy places for super cheap in, say, Italy? Why? Are the taxes super high or something? (it's adjusted to USD, at least according to the show)

Like $150k can get you a pretty nice place here but sometimes that show pretty much has mansions with insane views on a fairly large amount of land for that ballpark. 

Nicmorrison14

I love that show too! I was wondering the same thing. Otherwise I need ot move to Italy lol. The thing that makes me sick (or envious) is when the couple already has a beautiful house and they are buying a "summer home" in Italy or someplace for $150k. What do you people do?! lol.

Rachelroni

My MIL to be has said even if she had 20,000.00 to spend on our wedding she would throw the best party of our lives with 10,000.00 and give us the rest for a house. I cannot fathom spending that much on a wedding. At the end of the day the wedding doesn't matter if you love who you're married to. 

arrippa

My FI and I are having a "luxury wedding" that we are 100% paying for ourselves. We are both late 30's and have good jobs. I was engaged in my early 20's and had I gotten married, my wedding would be vastly different than the one I am planning. People are in different places in their lives and I choose to wait until I was settled and had a career before I got married. That choice has allowed me some extra money for it. 

KatWAG

Jells2dot0 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

It's not about the dollar amount. It's about being respectful of a gift. It drives me crazy when brides/grooms think someone owes them a wedding. Or when they aren't grateful enough of someone's contribution to stay within budget. It screams spoiled and reminds me of toddlers in tiaras/my super sweet sixteen. I also think its hilarious/obnoxious when "luxury brides" act like money/things are all that matters and act like they're next to royalty...except they're spending their parents' money. Awesome!

I agree that money is not the end all/be all. However, just because someone's parents offer to pay for a substantial part of a wedding as a generous gift doesn't mean that the couple themselves can't pick up the tab. Should a parent pay $30K for a new car when someone turns 16? Should parents drop $200k+ just so their kid can attend an ivy league school? Maybe not, but if someone's parents offer, then it's very gracious and thoughtful of them and they are doing it because they care.

I also agree cruffino- this post is getting judgy VERY quickly. We don't know the circumstances of anyone's choices. It would be rude to judge someone spending $3K and calling them "cheap" or "frugal" just like it's rude to call someone spending $100K "spoiled" without knowing the circumstances.

This. It is all relative. Our wedding was well over 95k, but we paid for it all in cash. We live completely debt free and had the money so why not? We didn't do it to flaunt what we have, we did it to throw one hell of a party.

Jells2dot0

KatWAG said:

Jells2dot0 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

It's not about the dollar amount. It's about being respectful of a gift. It drives me crazy when brides/grooms think someone owes them a wedding. Or when they aren't grateful enough of someone's contribution to stay within budget. It screams spoiled and reminds me of toddlers in tiaras/my super sweet sixteen. I also think its hilarious/obnoxious when "luxury brides" act like money/things are all that matters and act like they're next to royalty...except they're spending their parents' money. Awesome!

I agree that money is not the end all/be all. However, just because someone's parents offer to pay for a substantial part of a wedding as a generous gift doesn't mean that the couple themselves can't pick up the tab. Should a parent pay $30K for a new car when someone turns 16? Should parents drop $200k+ just so their kid can attend an ivy league school? Maybe not, but if someone's parents offer, then it's very gracious and thoughtful of them and they are doing it because they care.

I also agree cruffino- this post is getting judgy VERY quickly. We don't know the circumstances of anyone's choices. It would be rude to judge someone spending $3K and calling them "cheap" or "frugal" just like it's rude to call someone spending $100K "spoiled" without knowing the circumstances.

This. It is all relative. Our wedding was well over 95k, but we paid for it all in cash. We live completely debt free and had the money so why not? We didn't do it to flaunt what we have, we did it to throw one hell of a party.

As I started to say in an earlier post (TK ate it!), my DH's ex wanted to have this crazy, large wedding, but neither her family or my DH's family come from money. So, her parents obliged her and took out a loan for their wedding. My DH was embarrassed but what could he do? At least the loan was not in his name. That marriage turned out exceptionally well, too. LOL 

I REALLY, REALLY don't understand why people take out loans for this kind of thing. Or accrue CC debt. Not worth it at all. However. as Kat said, it's really all relative. Everyone is in different circumstances at different points in their lives, but no marriage is less or more important because of the price tag of the wedding. Different people just have different resources and different priorities. No harm in that!

Majelin86

KeptInStitches said:

I think it's more about a mentality than a dollar figure, in my mind. If your parents are kind enough to pay for your wedding, you should be kind enough to respect the budget they set.

Agreed. It's more about the principle.

Jame1987

Something to also note is weddings cost different amounts in different places, we live in a small town where people think $37 per person is ridiculous, however we are getting married in Chicago where families are from and $137 is beginning to seem about average. So that's just another perspective to consider.

annathy03

I agree it's all about the attitude, and if a couple/bride is gracious in accepting a gift or budget from their parents in the cases where they provide one.

We are planning a 40k wedding, which is more than I ever thought I would spend on a single day, but like a PP, the vast majority of that is money we want to spend on our guests (steak, open bar, at a venue that is convenient to the airport and area attractions, etc).  My mother is contributing about a third of our budget and I'm extremely thankful for that.

And the area makes an incredible difference.  If we set the same budget in our hometown we could host a black tie affair, and we're not even in a particularly expensive area like the coasts.

kitty8403

moemacWed30594 said:

My FI and I are having a "luxury wedding" that we are 100% paying for ourselves. We are both late 30's and have good jobs. I was engaged in my early 20's and had I gotten married, my wedding would be vastly different than the one I am planning. People are in different places in their lives and I choose to wait until I was settled and had a career before I got married. That choice has allowed me some extra money for it. 

Same. I'm late 20s and was engaged to someone else 10 years ago; FI is in his 30s. I'm frugal by nature and spend a lot of time on the budget boards, but we still have the option of spending much more on our wedding now than many of our peers did. Around here, just an evening wedding and dinner reception like what we are planning tends to be viewed as excessive; most people plan 2-3 hour afternoon events. Pretty sure the locals (and my parents) are going to think we are nutty and lavish, while the well-to-do relatives from out of state may well think we're cheap. Sigh. Can't win 'em all.