Returned Check from wedding guests

swtpinkldy · October 2012

So today I received a letter in the mail from my bank with a check that was returned for insufficient funds, so the amount of the check plus a fee was taken from our account. What is the best way to address this? We did wait a bit to cash checks b/c we misplaced them. Help please. I feel bad for them and don't want them to be too embarrassed, but the money is already spentwe are going on a trip with our church so it was already donated

kmmssg · October 2012

Their bank will be notifying them their check was returned for nsf so you don' have to be the bad guy here. I would think they will be contacting you shortly.

violet355 · October 2012

did your check bounce? or did someone else's check bounce when you cashed it? i'm confused.

if you deposited a check in your account and it bounced there is no reason that your bank should be penalizing you.

pretzelgrrl · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:e352f117-29ed-441f-ab11-f0a8466a0338">Re: Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]did your check bounce? or did someone else's check bounce when you cashed it? i'm confused. if you deposited a check in your account and it bounced there is no reason that your bank should be penalizing you.
Posted by violet355[/QUOTE]

Some banks use it to charge both...mine has done that

swtpinkldy · October 2012

We deposited the checks about 2.5 weeks after the wedding. I mean it's spent because we already sent a check for the entire amount to the church, so it'll just come from our personal money not necessarily the check, does that make sense? And yes their check bounced and my account was penalized. When we deposited the checks, there was no hold on them, essentially the money was ours. When the bank returned their check, my bank took the money out and charged a fee.

violet355 · October 2012

that's crazy town. i'd call your bank and complain, and ask to see their bounced check policy in writing.

crash2729 · October 2012

Um, I would call your bank.

That's their bad for not holding the money unless the checkwriter was from the same bank.

Sometimes, in that case they essentially cash it...but I would think they would check that before they just give you money.

lyradimer · October 2012

That sucks for you. Your bank might be willing to refund the fee, especially if this has never happened to you before. Just politely explain the situation to them, most bankers I've worked with are very helpful for situations like that. I wouldn't mention it to the person who sent you the check, but I would be careful of taking checks from them in the future. I disagree with some of the PP, however, It doesn't sound to me like your bank has done anything wrong.

Lisa50 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:06871ff1-0244-414b-a553-3d2123e69197">Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]So today I received a letter in the mail from my bank with a check that was returned for insufficient funds, so the amount of the check plus a fee was taken from our account. What is the best way to address this? We did wait a bit to cash checks b/c we misplaced them. Help please. I feel bad for them and don't want them to be too embarrassed, but the money is already spentwe are going on a trip with our church so it was already donated
Posted by swtpinkldy[/QUOTE]

I would place the entire package (returned check, enclosed paper and original envelope) in another, larger envelope with a note ... "Dear Missy, Enclosed is the check you gave us for the wedding. Unfortunately, it was returned by our bank and an insufficient check fee was charged to our account. How would you like to handle this? Thanks, Pink Lady" and, I'd write my phone number under my signature.

Clearly, this is a tough situation. I would not discuss it with anyone other than H and the gift-giver.

swtpinkldy · October 2012

Thanks for all your responses. I was more concerned about whether I should mention it to the check writer, but I think I'll just leave it be.

swtpinkldy · October 2012

Lisa I just saw your response. My sister says to ask them just to give them the benefit of the doubt, perhaps their account closed b/c of fraud or something. Thanks for your suggestion, I'll think about it

libby2483 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:371800c2-8ae7-4140-bbc9-6a38d2c6e651">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]I've also never heard Of a bank withdrawing the amount FROM an account when the account holder makes a deposit that gets returned or charging them a fee. That's usually what happens to the person who WROTE the bad check. This just seems weird to me.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

<div>Actually, lots of banks are starting to do this. It makes absolutely no sense, but it is becoming more common nonetheless. This happened to us when we were cashing wedding checks and someone's check bounced, and I called my bank to complain about the charge. After I whined a bit, they reversed the charge.</div>

phfiely · October 2012

Ugh that sucks! This happened to me with a paycheck. The check was deposited and showed as "available funds" in my account, not pending or processing, on a Friday morning. I use my debit card for everything, and over the weekend had about 8 transactions. Monday afternoon, check was reversed causing an over withdrawal, and every subsequent debit transaction incurred another fee, I'm addition to bounced check fee. I was livid! I was able to get the bank to reverse the 300 of fees bc it wasn't me who wrote the bad check and I'd never overdrawn before it only happened here bc of the check bouncing and me not having tons of extra cash bc I was a poor law student. Sorry for that tangent : I would probably tactfully contact the gift giver. It's one thing if you just couldn't deposit the check, but since you incurred fees as well from your bank it'd be pretty crappy for you to be held responsible. Definitely awkward.

DMoore421 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:b750b20c-cf44-4191-914c-749344722955">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]We deposited the checks about 2.5 weeks after the wedding. I mean it's spent because we already sent a check for the entire amount to the church, so it'll just come from our personal money not necessarily the check, does that make sense? And yes their check bounced and my account was penalized. When we deposited the checks, there was no hold on them, essentially the money was ours. When the bank returned their check, my bank took the money out and charged a fee.
Posted by swtpinkldy[/QUOTE]

I dont understand why you would be charged a fee - except in the case that that you check subsequently bounces... then you would be responsible for the fee -
honestly as long as you do not bounce stuff all the time - the fee for their check being returned should be credited if you call and explain - most banks will reimburse it as long as its not a regualr occurence

crash2729 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:2e19e849-878b-47b2-80a3-72517ff78b22">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]Ugh that sucks! This happened to me with a paycheck. The check was deposited and showed as "available funds" in my account, not pending or processing, on a Friday morning. I use my debit card for everything, and over the weekend had about 8 transactions. Monday afternoon, check was reversed causing an over withdrawal, and every subsequent debit transaction incurred another fee, I'm addition to bounced check fee. I was livid! I was able to get the bank to reverse the 300 of fees bc it wasn't me who wrote the bad check and I'd never overdrawn before it only happened here bc of the check bouncing and me not having tons of extra cash bc I was a poor law student. Sorry for that tangent : I<strong> would probably tactfully contact the gift giver. It's one thing if you just couldn't deposit the check, but since you incurred fees as well from your bank it'd be pretty crappy for you to be held responsible. Definitely awkward</strong>.
Posted by phfiely[/QUOTE]
Why would you contact the gift giver? If there's a problem with the fee call the bank the gift giver will neither reverse the charge or not likely give extra money to cover it. I personally would have a HUGE problem being penalized for someone elses screw up and be calling the bank.

phfiely · October 2012

What? That's exactly what I mean..if the bank won't reverse the fee when you explain the situation then you're either stuck paying it or hopefully the gift giver would. This situation would be horribly awkward since the OP is dealing with a guest not an employer like I was. But yea, a lot of banks charge the person who wrote the bad check and you for depositing a bad check. Hopefully her bank will be nice but if not then not only does she not receive the gift, she has to pay fees too.

crash2729 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:81b50d76-58cd-4f5f-8551-4e590e9327ba">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]What? That's exactly what I mean..if the bank won't reverse the fee when you explain the situation then you're either stuck paying it or hopefully the gift giver would. This situation would be horribly awkward since the OP is dealing with a guest not an employer like I was. But yea, a lot of banks charge the person who wrote the bad check and you for depositing a bad check. Hopefully her bank will be nice but if not then not only does she not receive the gift, she has to pay fees too.
Posted by phfiely[/QUOTE]
I don't know that I would want to take another check from someone who just bounced a check to me. <div>But I would rather pay the fee than ask a guest to cover the fee. Awkward.</div>

Cortney1982 · October 2012

I would have no problem letting the wedding guest know their mishap as it cost YOU a fee. They are probably the type that doesn't keep a checkbook register and when they check their balance, they assume it's all theirs to spend.

kmmssg · October 2012

I just had this happen but it wasn't a check from any kind of gift. Someone wrote me a check for 72.00 and I deposited it into my checking account. The check bounced and my bank withdrew the 72.00 from my the account along with a 3.00 service charge.

sarahneal · October 2012

I would pay the fee and move on.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:59eef311-b303-41cc-b1cd-e09b81692e3a">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Returned Check from wedding guests : I dont understand why you would be charged a fee - except in the case that that you check subsequently bounces... then you would be responsible for the fee - honestly as long as you do not bounce stuff all the time - the fee for their check being returned should be credited if you call and explain - most banks will reimburse it as long as its not a regualr occurence
Posted by DMoore421[/QUOTE]

I'm assuming the check was small enough to "clear" immediately (in my bank, anything that's $100 or less, I think, is available for immediate use), she wrote a check for basically everything in her account, then the check ended up not clearing. So the bank took back the $100 or whatever AND charged her an NSF fee.

So, OP, it's not the check writer's fault you overdrafted your account. Her check bouncing didn't do that to you. The fact that you wrote a check for money that hadn't cleared did that to you.

Let it go.

crash2729 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:3ed3f90f-31a6-4d23-8476-b7c583b3bcaf">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Returned Check from wedding guests : Okay, if that's the case, it makes much more sense. <strong> I read it as OP deposited $x in the account, check bounced, so bank took an ADDITIONAL $x out of the account and charged her a fee.</strong> Which made zero sense to me. And, yes, if that's the case, then it's really on you to pay the fee for your overdrafted account The gift giver will be notified that their check bounced and have to pay their own fee. They should not be responsible for yours in addition to that because you didn't wait for the money to truly clear.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

I THINK that is what happened. OP said the money would have come out of her personal money rather than coming from the gift check, which to me made me think she had enough to cover even though the check bounced.

arendiva · October 2012

I would absolutely complain to your bank. There is no reason that your account should be penalized when you have done nothing wrong. If you whine enough they will reverse the charge.

zantster · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_returned-check-from-wedding-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0e47dfc8-adf8-46a1-95ec-cb837f9a10eePost:14b4f7be-84f1-4124-9aca-aa655271526f">Re:Returned Check from wedding guests</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Returned Check from wedding guests : I'm assuming the check was small enough to "clear" immediately (in my bank, anything that's $100 or less, I think, is available for immediate use), she wrote a check for basically everything in her account, then the check ended up not clearing. So the bank took back the $100 or whatever AND charged her an NSF fee. So, OP, it's not the check writer's fault you overdrafted your account. Her check bouncing didn't do that to you. The fact that you wrote a check for money that hadn't cleared did that to you. Let it go.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

That sounds like it in a nutshell. If a person doesn't wait for the difference between "current balance" and "available balance" to equal out then this can definitely happen. I can see the two balances when I look at my account online so I don't spend what I don't have. Ditto just letting it go since it was probably OPs check that triggered the NSF unless we're still missing something.

leahkate · October 2012

Honestly, I can see why banks do this. It's basically the same as someone depositing counterfeit money into an account. If there is no value (check or otherwise) then there is no real deposit.

Always cash checks first, then deposit the cash. If possible, cash the check at the bank that the check was drawn on. That way, they can tell you then and there if it's a bad check. I have to do this with my business all the time. I would have been jipped many times otherwise.

leahkate · October 2012

Honestly, I can see why banks do this. It's basically the same as someone depositing counterfeit money into an account. If there is no value (check or otherwise) then there is no real deposit.

Always cash checks first, then deposit the cash. If possible, cash the check at the bank that the check was drawn on. That way, they can tell you then and there if it's a bad check. I have to do this with my business all the time. I would have been jipped many times otherwise.

leahkate · October 2012

Honestly, I can see why banks do this. It's basically the same as someone depositing counterfeit money into an account. If there is no value (check or otherwise) then there is no real deposit.

Always cash checks first, then deposit the cash. If possible, cash the check at the bank that the check was drawn on. That way, they can tell you then and there if it's a bad check. I have to do this with my business all the time. I would have been jipped many times otherwise.

LeiselEB · October 2012

This happened to us, too.

We deposited the check, and saw it in our account, but it was not in our actual/available balance yet. When it bounced, our bank notified us and then just didn't put that amount into our actual balance. So we never really could have spent THAT money unless we overdrafted by looking at the pending balance and not the actual balance.

I have a feeling this is what the OP is dealing with.

We also got charged a fee, which sucks, but I'd much rather pay a 12 dollar fee than contact someone and say, "Hey your check bounced. Please write a new one and include X for the fee my bank charged." Just let it go.

swtpinkldy · October 2012

I forgot about this forum decided to check back. To clarify and you would have gotten this had you read what I wrote I didn't overdraft my account. We were charged a fee for the check bouncing, not NSF. We chalked it up as a loss and will not accept any more checks from this family. In response to available balance/current balance, I'm well aware of the difference. Also we got around 50 checks, to cash each one would've been hard, and we wouldda lost half of it in gas anyway with the crazy prices..lol. If anyone is still confused, sorry I'm not a great poster but I figured it out.

Ajuliana · October 2012

Chase bank does charge you a fee when someone else's check bounces. It happened to my FI when he got a check at his college graduation party this year. Kind of shitty, but you should never say anything to the gift givers about it. Obviously they will see it on their account, be embarassed, but what do you expect to happen? Gifts are optional, unfortunately you are out whatever nominal amount the fee was. But most banks, even big ones, will refund that.

Returned Check from wedding guests

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