Hello! New here, and I have some questions for just general wedding etiquette. My boyfriend (soon to be fiance) and I have been together for almost 3 years, have a daughter together, and have lived together for 2 years. We are settled in our home, and don't really need anything.
I have been married before, and he hasn't, so we're doing a very laid back wedding at a park. I had the big fancy to-do the first time, and it wasn't at all what I ever wanted, but my parents insisted on having a fancy wedding with all of their friends and such. (I was 19 and worked at Wal-Mart, so it wasn't really my choice. It was a nice wedding, but just...huge.)
This time, we're paying for it. If it were up to me, I'd sign the papers at the courthouse and call it a day. But, since this is my FF's first marriage, he wants a wedding. So, we're compromising into a kick ass barbecue ceremony/reception at a local park overlooking the lake, with our family and close friends. (Probably about 40-50 people)
So. As far as gifts, how does that work? We have a can opener and all the dishware we really need. We're not doing any kind of shower or engagement party or anything like that.
I'm just planning to wear a white or cream sundress and either a pair of brown sandals or no shoes at all (depending on the goose population next year) It's a June early evening wedding dinner thing.
I'm going for the "mismatched bridesmaids dresses" where the ladies are just wearing light pink sundresses of their own choice. Do they buy them themselves since they are just a casual dress they're picking out or is it still my responsibility? None of my bridesmaids live within a 2 hour radius of me, so it's not like we can just go shopping to pick something. The guys will be wearing khakis or dark jeans (not sure which) and white button ups, and we will be providing the vest for the wedding.
How is a good way to word "no ratty jeans or t-shirts"? We want people to be comfortable in the June heat, but it's still a wedding. (And no, in my area, it's NOT common sense. We have people wear jeans and shoes with holes to court as a common practice.) I'm fine with khaki shorts and polo shirts or nice t-shirts.
Is there a proper way to do a dinner wedding? I want everyone to eat and get to chatting and having fun, do a super quick ceremony (like 5 or 10 minutes) then cake, lawn games, drinking, dancing, and smores, with sparklers to end the night.
Anyways, fill me in anything I'm missing, both as a second bride, and any red flags you see here. We're still doing full decorations with flowers and centerpieces and a fancy alter and caterer and everything.