Dear Prudence,
I was close friends with “Cara.” She called me crying, saying her car was broken in another city and she needed over $500 to fix it. If she lost her car, she would lose her job (there are no buses in our area). I was once homeless and used to live in my car, which Cara knew. My heart bled for her, so I sent her the money, telling her to pay me back when she could.
It was a lie. Cara never had a car problem; she was out partying. All our friends apparently knew this. I confronted Cara, and she laughed. She said she doesn’t have to pay me back because I turned “psycho.” I have gotten no sympathy from any of our friends. I get lectures about not loaning money you can’t afford. If Cara had actually been in trouble and couldn’t have paid me back, I would have forgiven the loan. She wasn’t in trouble; she lied, she stole, and she leveraged personal information I’d shared with her in order to do so. If Cara stole money out of my purse, everyone would call that a crime. But since she relied on my trust, apparently it’s my fault for being a fool. I am taking Cara to small claims court. I guess I am looking for some understanding—am I am unreasonable for thinking like this? I would have never done this to a friend, even at my lowest.
—My Friend’s a Thief