So a little over four years ago I finally ended a very, very unhealthy relationship that had been on and off for about seven years. I broke up with him and made it clear I didn't want him to contact me again, and aside from an errant one-line email and a bizarre comment on my blog, he hasn't bugged me. I still think of him, the way you'd think of anyone who was a big part of your life for seven years, but in a very, "Good lord, what was I thinking???" kind of way. I have him blocked on social media and I don't visit his website or blog.
Yesterday I was talking to my mom on the phone and gushing about how proud I was of FI for getting sent to cover the local gubernatorial election for his job. Then my ex came up and I mentioned how lucky I felt to be with FI and not have to deal with ex's nonsense anymore. She asked me if I knew what he was doing and I said nope. She then said, "Well...I kind of do. Do you want to know?"
She's not FB friends with him of course, but my cousin still is (my cousin has never even talked to him, so I'd imagine she just hasn't bothered defriending him because she's never on FB). Mom said that much of his page is private, but she was able to tell that he's still way, way into anime (no issue with those who do, but he took it to a really unhealthy level), has gotten a lot uglier, is in an "open relationship" with a girl who looks 20 (he's 31), works a crappy retail job (he's trained to do much more skilled positions, but any time his jobs get hard he has the tendency to get fired or quit), and as far as she can tell still lives with his parents.
So, some of those details are super petty. I get that. But it felt good to hear that after four years, he really hasn't changed. Meaning that he was never going to change, and I absolutely made the right decision to cut him out of my life. Even if I hadn't met FI, it still would have been the right decision.
Just needed to share.
