Dear Prudence,
My husband and I recently moved into his children’s school district. There are many friendly people in this community, but I have had a surprising number of less-than-cordial encounters. I have been introduced to the wife of one of my husband’s associates no fewer than 10 times, but she always acts like she just met me. We were not invited to a graduation party of someone we know very well and who lives around the corner from us. We have attended numerous neighborhood parties where only a few of the people there make conversation. Last fall, the neighborhood planned to move an annual neighborhood picnic and I replied that I wouldn’t be able to attend if the date changed. Not one response. They changed the party anyway.
Someone recently asked me about living in my new community. I said it was nice, but it seemed like people were not all that friendly and I missed my old neighborhood. I realized that the person I was speaking to had a relative on my street and tried to backtrack a bit. But apparently I caused a stir. We have been completely ignored by neighbors at a school concert and we attended a holiday party at which only four people spoke to us. My husband and I are really nice people and have many friends so I don’t need these people in my life, but I’m completely blown away. I’m sorry if I offended anyone. However, if I heard that someone wasn’t feeling welcomed, I’d try to rectify the situation, rather than behave more unfriendly toward them. Do you have suggestions for resolving the situation?