I’ve been with the same company for about five years, but this year I was transferred to a new division. My boss, “Jane,” is five years older than me. We’re both women. I’m openly gay, and she is married to a man. I have a huge crush on her. She’s a wonderful manager who cares a lot about me as a person and demonstrates that frequently. She’s given me no indication she views me as anything more than a direct report, and I would obviously never act on this crush. I’m dating a great woman who’s a few years younger than me. I see a future together, but I often compare her to Jane in my mind. That doesn’t cause problems in our relationship, but I worry it’s harder for me to be fully in love with her. How can I continue this close working relationship, knowing I have a crush on Jane? Crush aside, she’s the best boss I’ve ever had, and I would be really bummed to transfer out of the division, which could likely place me under a less-effective manager. What should I do?
—Best Boss Ever