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Attire & Accessories Forum

Is it even my place?

My future mother in law is extremely wealthy. She lives in Saudi Arabia where weddings are a good excuse for women to get together and show off their lavish dresses (since they are covered the majority of the time). 

We were shopping recently and she asked me what I thought of this beautiful, beaded and slinky gown. I told her I loved it and asked her for what occaison... she replied, "For the wedding!". She didn't buy the dress, but I am afraid that she will show up to the wedding in a showstopper. I am slightly concerned that she might inadvertantly upstage me, but seriously concerned that she will make my mother feel as if her more reasonable dress is not good enough. I don't want my mother to have her feelings hurt.

Is there anything I can do to prevent my FMIL from choosing an inappropriate dress? Is it even my place to be concerned about her choice of outfit? I have expressed my concern to my fiance, and he assured me that she would choose an appropriate dress (although he has never been to an American wedding before, and he may not know that what is "appropriate" in Saudi may not be so in the US). 

Any advice?

Re: Is it even my place?

  • I would show your fiance what your mom plans to wear and explain that this is more typical for American weddings.

    Your future MIL might want to wear a fancy dress anyway, and really that's up to her. You can't tell her what to wear since she's not in the wedding party. But she also might want to know what people typically wear to weddings in your family/area. 


  • I would maybe show her a photo of what your mom is wearing and say something like "in the US its nice sometimes if the MOB and MOG "coordinate" their outfits so neither one upstages the other :)" Make it light hearted and not pushy and then maybe she will get it.  You could also start asking her what she plans to wear - be interested! Then she may tell you her plans and you could then bring your moms outfit into it.

    Good Luck!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Thanks girls! Good advice. I feel better. :)
  • Ditto the girls. Show her what your mom is wearing.

    If she still chooses to wear some crazy number, let her. You won't be upstaged!

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