I dislike my MOH's dress!

MayMilitaryBride

I really don't like the dress that my maid of honor chose, it doesnt compliment her body shape at all, but i feel like i can't say too much. She had such a hard time finding a dress that fit the style and color in her size that when she found something that she actually liked i said it was fine. There isnt much time left and i was getting tired of her excuses. I know that sounds harsh but i dont mean for it too. Everyone says dont say anything and to just go with but, geesh. Im not one of those brides that wants her MOH and bridesmaids to wear ugly dresses, i wanted everyone to have beautiful dresses that they liked and felt comfortable in. Anyone got any advice on how to deal with this?

littlemoments324

if she likes it and is comfortable in the dress, then let her wear it...Yes, it may not have been what you would have worn, but you just said she's been having a difficult time finding a dress...so I would just grin & bear it...

MayMilitaryBride

You're very right.

pockysquirrel

Seconding littlemoments - I just had this happen with one of my bridesmaids. She picked a dress that did her no favors whatsoever, but it met the criteria I set for them (they're all wearing different dresses in the same length and color) and she likes it, so I'm not going to make any waves about it. Even if it was a hill I was prepared to die on, it's not like she'd listen to me...her boyfriend didn't like the dress either, and she didn't even take his opinion into consideration! Really, if she's happy and comfortable in the dress she picked, I think doing anything about it is too much work and frustration to be worth it.

amanda1611t

If you want her to get a dress that you like, take her shopping and pay for her dress! that is the only way she would be happy with getting a dress you want, i would assume.

rissskisss

Say something!! You'll have to look at these wedding pictures for the rest of your life! All you'll see if the fugly dress that you wish you would've gotten rid of before the wedding. Just go shopping with her, suggest some different fabrics, ask the sales people to only show cuts they believe will compliment her best, and just say you aren't crazy about the dress she already has. If she's important enough to you to be your MOH...she'll understand.

MayMilitaryBride

I offered to pay for the dress but she wanted to get it herself. To be honest the dress didn't meet my criteria, the style was fine but she was supposed to get a yellow dress and instead she got an orange one. Which will work because orange is one of our colors. I just feel bad bc the dress looks not so good on her, but then again that is my opinion. She said she liked the dress but i think she was just tired of looking. She sent me a lot of pictures of dresses and i told her what i honestly thought of each, i guess i just dont know how to address it, without her gettting mad or upset. I really dont want to upset her. I havent even seen the dress yet Im supposed to get to see it next week.

Grits8812

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_i-dislike-my-mohs-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:96af171d-4a01-44e8-a70d-0f0faa6b8e89Post:d5d422f7-ae9b-4b22-b079-90210da7be01">I dislike my MOH's dress!</a>:
[QUOTE]I really don't like the dress that my maid of honor chose, it doesnt compliment her body shape at all, but i feel like i can't say too much. She had such a hard time finding a dress that fit the style and color in her size that when she found something that she actually liked i said it was fine. There isnt much time left and i was getting tired of her excuses. I know that sounds harsh but i dont mean for it too. Everyone says dont say anything and to just go with but, geesh. Im not one of those brides that wants her MOH and bridesmaids to wear ugly dresses,<strong> i wanted everyone to have beautiful dresses that they liked and felt comfortable in. </strong>Anyone got any advice on how to deal with this?
Posted by MayMilitaryBride[/QUOTE]
Then if she likes it and is comfortable in it then what is the problem?  I'm sure it will look fine.

mandybride2154

No relationship
You can give you the most satisfactory answer: http://www.meganbridalshop.com
have a nice day

msuprincess04

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_i-dislike-my-mohs-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:15Discussion:96af171d-4a01-44e8-a70d-0f0faa6b8e89Post:fbfa78ca-cee3-4f27-8ee0-19a1ee5a01d0">Re: I dislike my MOH's dress!</a>:
[QUOTE] I havent even seen the dress yet :( Im supposed to get to see it next week.
Posted by MayMilitaryBride[/QUOTE]

If you haven't even seen the dress on, then you need to relax a bit. Dresses can look a whole lot better than expected once they are on with the proper undergarments. Remember, Spanks are amazing for a reason. That's not to say you can ask your BM to wear them, but I'd guess she's already planning on it. Give her a chance to prove you wrong! If you go in hating it, then you will only see what your preconcieved notion told you to see.

kateguess22

Figure out how horrible this dress is. Would it literally ruin the wedding and the pictures? (I'm guessing not.) I would lean toward just letting her wear it.
If it really is that horrible that it's to the point where it will ruin your ceremony or your photos, then of course you need to say something. Just be very positive, not negative. Be very gentle with her feelings. I'd say that the most important part of all of this is her feelings. Maybe focus on the fact that it's not the colour that you wanted her to wear. And help her find a different dress in the right colour that you chose for her to wear in the wedding.

ArcheryGirl1

I say wait until you see it on her.  Are you the kind of friend that says "oh, it looks nice" when you really think it's horrible?  Or are you the kind of friend that says "I know you like it, but It really does nothing for you"?  If it is truly unflattering then it's up to you as her friend (and the bride) to tell her there are other options that would suit her better.  You may need to take her shopping yourself and show her the more flattering options. (And in the color you want her to wear.)

SoSaysTara

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_i-dislike-my-mohs-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:96af171d-4a01-44e8-a70d-0f0faa6b8e89Post:b07d695c-a971-477f-aca9-10df7b0360b7">Re: I dislike my MOH's dress!</a>:
[QUOTE]Seconding littlemoments - I just had this happen with one of my bridesmaids. She picked a dress that did her no favors whatsoever, but it met the criteria I set for them (they're all wearing different dresses in the same length and color) and she likes it, so I'm not going to make any waves about it. Even if it was a hill I was prepared to die on, it's not like she'd listen to me...her boyfriend didn't like the dress either, and she didn't even take his opinion into consideration! Really, if she's happy and comfortable in the dress she picked, I think doing anything about it is too much work and frustration to be worth it.
Posted by pockysquirrel[/QUOTE]

Exactly this happened to me.  I really hate one of my girls' dresses, but it met what I said, so we're just going with it!

katieburkes

If your friend is going through a hard time, she might not think she DESERVES to look nice on your day! 

It sounds like her self-confidence is really down in the dumps. I would suggest telling a little white lie (i.e. "I don't like So-and-so's dress, mind coming with me to look at alternatives for her?") and then letting her model the new styles. Hopefully she'll find one much more flattering and you can help boost her ego by telling her how GREAT she looks! On the other hand, maybe let her know how much you care about her and you want her to feel as beautiful as she is - and you think there might be another dress out there that will bring out her beauty! The key in both scenarios is making her feel great about herself!

Good luck!