Snarky Brides

He's not going to ask again.

I've told a few of you about DH's family members constantly and rudely asking us when we are going to have children and how much it bothers me and how next time I might lose it on someone.

Smug SIL had her babies on Thursday night (they are so cute, btw, and she's doing really well and I'm actually pretty impressed with how she's handling motherhood), so of course we're getting asked. 

About 10 of us were standing around in the recovery room when DH's uncle said "you guys are next, so when's it going to be?" He's a real shitstirrer as it is and loves getting under anyone's skin. 

I replied, "Actually, I think we're going to wait a few years and let you become a grandpa first." 

His daughter's 7.  He didn't like that answer. 

Re: He's not going to ask again.

  • HAHAHAHA this is so so awesome.

    So glad the twins and mom are doing well :)
  • HA! I love your answer. People are so rude. Hell I've had people ask me if we're having kids. First of all I'm 44, second I had my tubes tied at 25 after my one and only child.

    So I just inform them that we would if the tubal didnt take. They usually shut up. And why is it that it's assumed because people get married they re going to procreate ASAP, or at all. This is a very personal thing for most couples.
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  • Excellent, most excellent response!
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    Do not mess in the affairs of dinosaurs because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
    I love you Missy. Even though you are not smart enough to take online quizzes to find out really important information. ~cew
  • Ha, love your answer. Hopefully that will shut him up for good.
  • edited July 2010
    Ha! Excellent answer!! Fi and I bought his mum this pillow:




    She loved it. Both FI and I are adopted, so both our mothers went through the very difficult process of privately not being able to conceive to term, and publicly being asked over and over when they'd have kids. So, no pressure, really from them. Although both my parents, fi's parents and my late husband's parents have all said they'd quite like being grandparents (by us) on at least one occasion. ;)
  • My latest (yes I'm bitter and having troubles) retort to people is "We'll start trying when people stop asking". They don't know how to take that one.
  • Ha!  I love it.  I usually tell people I'll shiit one out the minute they promise to raise it.
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
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    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
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  • LOL! Maybe he will STFU now.
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  • Love it. And I love yours too, betrothed. I almost want someone to ask me so that I can say it.
  • edited July 2010
    I am lucky in that we don't get much pressure from our families (except MIL, but we ignore her anyway). In fact, my parents WANT us to wait a few years. They had kids at 19 and that was tough for them and they also already have 5 grandkids from my sisters so I think they are good for now.

    The really annoying one is every one at work bugs me constantly, including my boss which is really inappropriate. I need a really good answer for them that is still sfw.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:7522d931-d500-4563-ab8a-a90455092c38">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]The really annoying one is every one at work bugs me constantly, including my boss which is really inappropriate. I need a really good answer for them that is still sfw.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    Maybe it's just my company's laid back atmosphere, but I definitely use that line on my coworkers as well.
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • edited July 2010
    These answers are great, I'm going to add those to my list.  His other uncle hasn't seen us lately and he's an obnoxious shitstirrer too.

    Knitti, that's cute.  My parents refer to my dogs as their grandpups.

    When my dad asks when he's going to have (human) grandchildren, I remind him that I put myself through college and I'm still paying for it, and if he had helped in any way shape or form we'd already be financially ready to have kids.  He's so dense, though, that he just keeps pushing.  Undecided
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:e5032aa5-a4bc-479a-bc3a-4a7d4f115ef8">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: He's not going to ask again. : Maybe it's just my company's laid back atmosphere, but I definitely use that line on my coworkers as well.
    Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]

    I probably should. This is weird, but my co-workers (all male, on my level anyway) almost like to see me as some one open to motherhood. It is such a weird good old boys dynamic so I like to fly low under the radar with this stuff. It is not cool, but it is what it is.
  • Ah see, there's a big difference between our work environments.  All my coworkers (also male) like to think of me as one of the guys so when they get to ball-busting I throw it right back.
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • My H and I get asked a lot too but not really from family members, we are only 23.  It is also different living in a military community where everyone around us is having babies.  Just because your wife is pregnant for the third time in 3 years doesn't mean I am going to start popping kids out.  My older sister's very close friend asked when I was going to get knocked up now that I am married like a week after we had our small JOP ceremony.  God, that pissed me off.  I think I'm going to use some of these comebacks. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:50658812-c905-49fe-8677-06adb512db81">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ah see, there's a big difference between our work environments.  All my coworkers (also male) like to think of me as one of the guys so when they get to ball-busting I throw it right back.
    Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]

    Only when we're boozing ;)
  • That is a great answer Heels and Betrothed.  I wish people would just mind there own business. 
    KD-love the new sig.  You do not look 44!
    Amy-great shirt(even though I am not a red sox fan)
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  • I love it!

    M&M, I love your sig! I'm stealing it. Sorry. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery you know.
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  • I usually tell BILs I'm going to let them both have kids before I do.  Neither is in a very long term relationship, and both have several more years of school before they'll be able to reasonably start a family due to their education plans.  It never works.

    However, since switching to "Every time someone asks when we're going to have a kids, I add a year," BIL's girlfriend has gotten the tally up to 8 years and counting before I have children.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:4d94ec1e-eee9-4dfd-89e9-c2d769cfbdb8">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I love it! M&M, I love your sig! I'm stealing it. Sorry. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery you know.
    Posted by MarriedInAFever[/QUOTE]

    haha no worries! I think we should all do it personally :) Then, maybe KA will change the description of this board to include something about MadMen. We would be such ultimate fans.
  • i get the same thing, mostly from people i went to high school with.  i'm only 23 and am pretty much the only one that does not have a kid (or two or three)yet.  the most recent was my (former) best friend in high school who less than 2 months ago had her 3rd abortion.  she found out last week that she was preggo again (for the second time with a guy she's only been dating since april) and decided it was time to actually keep one of them (classy, right?)  she then proceeded to have her "last hurrah" as she called it, where she got plastered drunk and smoked 2 packs of cigarettes because..."well...what if i didn't find out till tomorrow, i still would've gotten wasted tonight anyways". 

    then she has the audasity to tell me i have to get pregnant now because i'll be the only one from highschool without a kid.  to which my reply was "yeah, but i'm also the only one from highschool with a college degree, to own my own home, to have a well-paying job and the ability to travel, so i'm used to being the 'only one' for a lot of things compared to people at our highschool."
    Anniversary
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:6ef55f8c-8baf-41c2-90b0-651cf1acc9a5">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]i get the same thing, mostly from people i went to high school with.  i'm only 23 and am pretty much the only one that does not have a kid (or two or three)yet.  the most recent was my (former) best friend in high school who less than 2 months ago had her 3rd abortion.  she found out last week that she was preggo again (for the second time with a guy she's only been dating since april) and decided it was time to actually keep one of them (classy, right?)  she then proceeded to have her "last hurrah" as she called it, where she got plastered drunk and smoked 2 packs of cigarettes because..."well...what if i didn't find out till tomorrow, i still would've gotten wasted tonight anyways".  then she has the audasity to tell me i have to get pregnant now because i'll be the only one from highschool without a kid.  to which my reply was "yeah, but i'm also the only one from highschool with a college degree, to own my own home, to have a well-paying job and the ability to travel, so i'm used to being the 'only one' for a lot of things compared to people at our highschool."
    Posted by jemmini6[/QUOTE]

    This whole post gives me the sads :(
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:9a6024c6-1e3b-4bdc-affb-0c6e873cc776">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: He's not going to ask again. : haha no worries! I think we should all do it personally :) Then, maybe KA will change the description of this board to include something about MadMen. We would be such ultimate fans.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    Brilliant!
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  • Oh no, Jemm.  Although I kind of wonder if we went to the same HS.  ;)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hes-not-going-ask-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:50208c25-e0c7-42e7-83d2-4c5cdf4b6dd0Post:11d53fc1-4417-43cf-80da-9aace2f3f37f">Re: He's not going to ask again.</a>:
    [QUOTE]These answers are great, I'm going to add those to my list.  His other uncle hasn't seen us lately and he's an obnoxious shitstirrer too. Knitti, that's cute.  My parents refer to my dogs as their grandpups. <strong>When my dad asks when he's going to have (human) grandchildren, I remind him that I put myself through college and I'm still paying for it, and if he had helped in any way shape or form we'd already be financially ready to have kids.</strong>  He's so dense, though, that he just keeps pushing. 
    Posted by goheels05[/QUOTE]

    I hope I have the balls to use this on my parents one day.
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  • PiruPiru member
    100 Comments
    edited July 2010
    Oh gosh, I am already sick of this question and we were before we even got engaged. FH's family is lovely but they ask this all the time.

    This came up on my horse forum and someone that wasn't planning on having kids at all finally burst into tears in a group setting with her husband's family after being asked for the 30th time and ran off. Her husband politely explained that the question really upset her "... with her condition" and then he also ran off to comfort her. They never bothered explaining it wasn't that she was infertile; she was just sick to death of the question. Never got asked again. She highly recommends it!

    Some pressure has come off since his 17 year old sis just ended up having a kid but I just know they're still going to save all the baby stuff for us. Lots of people still asking. Ugh, just leave us ALONE! We're 23 and 24, we're not exactly running out of time!
    And if you should die before me, ask if you can take a friend. Pick a flower, close your eyes,and drift away- STP
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    June siggy challenge!
  • My favorite now is people ask us why we don't start trying immediately (this would be my FMIL and FBIL).  Um because though I don't care if other people have babies prior to marriage that isn't my choice.  Also, I just paid a shite ton of money for an open bar.....I want to drink!!  Plus I don't even want to imagine the added stress of planning a wedding, graduate school and a baby.  That makes me feel sick to my tummy on its own.

    FI mentioned to FMIL that today I was feeling queasy.  She immediately jumped on her other son's facebook account to ask if I was preggers.  No I'm not and I deleted that crap off my wall!
  • Text convo with my father last night:

    dad:  give me some grandbabies

    me:  pay my student loans

    ::silence::
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