We've worked through all the issues and I'm no longer longing for the grass on the other side of the fence. We're happily working to make our relationship stronger but last night brought something to the surface that I'm feeling really worried about.
My fiance has a decent job that pays OK. The thing is, it's a dead end job. There's room for movement upwards but he's not interested in moving further up the chain there. So basically he's in a dead end. Through all the years we've been together he's talked about how he doesn't want to be like all the old guys doing what he does down the road. He feels like they're all losers in a sense.
At one point he ended up getting a job at a place that was a REALLY good opportunity. The economy took a rough turn and he got laid off because he was the new guy. They were still offering to let him take his A+ course and test at no cost. He didn't. That would've been a great thing to put on his resume AND he could've got a great job with that certification.
Anyway, he's back doing the job that he doesn't want to retire in. He talks about applying at boeing and going back to school but nothing ever happens. I helped him with his resume and it just sits. He always has an excuse. I don't know how much more encouraging and help it will take short of sending the app in for him.
But what really got me is last night we were having dinner with his parents and the subject of this competition that his company puts on that has a $30k bonus, a trip and another thing to put on his resume. I think he'd kick butt at it and his boss does too! We were all trying to encourage him to do it and he says "but it's worldwide". SO WHAT!? geez! Then, he realizes that someone from utah won last year so then his next excuse is "well we have so much going on with the wedding and all, I might do it next year."
That makes me mad for two reasons 1 - He doesn't have ANYTHING going on. All he has to do is show up on the day! Seriously, he hasn't done anything. Not that I really care for him to do anything but that excuse is terrible. 2 - He said he would apply to Boeing AFTER the wedding. So, it seems he either has no intention of doing that or he really has no intention of ever going into the competition.
I think he's terrified of failing. I don't know how to help him with that but I'm not sure I'll be completely happy being the bread winner for the rest of my life. I want a comfortable living. I want to be making 6 figures by myself in the next 10 years and I want someone to at least attempt to be successful. It would be nice if he could bring home $50k. Is that too much to ask?
In his defense he did try and get back with the company that laid him off when they were about to hire again. They never pulled the trigger so that went no where.
