MOH & BM ---Oh my the attitudes!

fperez7542

Ok, so before I vent I just want to say I have a MOH (who is my best friend), and 4 BM (who are really close friends).  I asked them to be part of the wedding, didn't expect them to do anything but buy the dress and show up.  Any other details or planning is up to them.  They are all the girls I see often, talk/text daily and are really close to me.  I have called them for opinions and questions and they have been great help.  One took pictures for out STDs.  Another one helped me design the STDs.  They have honestly been great.

They wanted to plan an engagement party.  I am the first person out of our entire group of friends who is getting married.  They are all excited and thrilled to be part of it.  So the MOH was all about it, created a special email so they all communicate, reached out to all the girls.  I was asked two questions: 1. if I wanted a big party (which I said no just parents, bridal party and my brother), and 2. where did I want it (I said to save $ rather my house because I know everyone is on a budget).  I also said we will leave them our house our entire day so they don't feel like I'm on top of them.

Now for the rant/vent...
Well, its been 3 weeks and the MOH has been MIA, she hasn't answered emails, texts calls nothing.  So another BM decided to go ahead with the planning and reaching out to the other BM.  Since everyone is from out of town she offered to pick people up at the train, she offered to cook, buy the groceries, even had her job do some decorations (which I don't know details off just know she has them). 

Now 3 days before the engagement the MOH has surfaced. She doesn't like the decorations the BM picked, she wants to add more food to the menu, asked the BM to go to the supermarket and make sure to get SPECIFIC name brands she needs.  The BM received some stuff from a friend that just did an engagement party and the MOH basically wants pictures of everything before she decides what she is going to use.  The BM is so upset.  Another BM tells me the MOH is upset cause she feels the BM is taking over. 

This morning I get another text that apparently NONE of the groomsmen knew about the engagement party.  They didn't know the details, time, or that it is in my house.  This was told to the MOH in January, to please reach out to the guys and they don't know????

I told everyone, I don't want to hear it, I'm done, and I'm over it.  You guys are adults, communicate.  BUT OMG!

fperez7542

Sorry for the long rant...

daveANDkristen

I'm sorry your WP has not been communicating well.  Enjoy your party!

AddieCake

Have you talked to the MOH about non-wedding things?  Maybe see what's going on in HER life? It's possible she just had other things going on. It is kind of crappy for her to show back up with demands and whatnot. I hope it all ends up ok and that you can have a good time. 

fperez7542

Addie, I usually talk to her a few times a day but for the past few weeks she just hasn't answered.  When she surfaced a few days ago I asked she just said she's been lazy and out of it.  She also told another BM that she just been blah about the whole planning.

I don't mind the MIA thing, I just don't like the demanding and attitude.  Its not nice.

AddieCake

Ahh, ok. Yeah, kinda crappy how she's handling it. Hopefully it all comes together and you'll have fun. 

fperez7542

Thank you! and I hope so.  Told all 4 BM to sit and talk to MOH.  I'm a bit upset but I'm not going to get stressed so if they are planning not to have issues for 6 more months they need to use their words.

AJuliaNJ

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-bm-oh-my-the-attitudes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7f4d9b12-fe2d-468f-8195-be83724eee7aPost:32aaa62d-eff3-4b43-b51e-0cf4af71678f">Re: MOH & BM ---Oh my the attitudes!</a>:
[QUOTE]Thank you! and I hope so.  Told all 4 BM to sit and talk to MOH.  I'm a bit upset but I'm not going to get stressed so if they are planning not to have issues for 6 more months they need to use their words.
Posted by fperez7542[/QUOTE]

<div>That sounds really intimidating and awkward. Why don't you just talk to her?</div>

allychase

You shouldn't be involved or know details about any pre wedding party planned in your honor. Tell anyone complaining to you that you shouldn't be involved.