Friend asks why isn't she a bridesmaid

brownsugarcinnamon

I have a friend who thought I was going to ask her to be in my wedding, but I didn't because (1) I''ve only known her a couple of years and (2) I thought she didn't approve of my FI because she made a comment about him when she saw his picture for the first time.  (Two years ago, he was in the hospital for a month & lost a lot of weight and she commented that he looked sick).  She is my half-brother's wife's niece and lives with them. My brother and sis-in-law don't like my FI because we're from different economic backgrounds and they think I could have picked someone better!  (I really don't care what they think at this point although my half-brother agreed to give me away because my parents are both deceased.)  I don't see them often, maybe a few times a year, also, my half-brother and I didn't grow up in the same household. Anyway, she texted me saying she can't figure out why I didn't ask her.  I'm thinking of having her in the program to read scripture or something.  What do you think - should I have asked her anyway or have her be on the program?  The wedding is 4 months away and the BM's & grooms are getting ready to order the wedding attire.

TNMurray

Don't second guess why you didn't ask her. If your originally planned to aske her to be aprt of the program you can let her know that. You can tell her what you just told us or not answer her at all.

Me&Miles96

Stuck with your original decision, regardless of your reasons you have invisioned certain ppl standing by you on your day and unfortunatly she was not one of them. I have a braidsmaid who maynot be in my wedding due to personal issues, and this is leaving us with an extra GM, my FI suggested that we make him an usher. My reply is no you wanted him to stand beside you and he will do just that...At the end of the day everything will be just fine.

hatroopes

If you don't feel comfortable with asking her to be a bridesmaid, then don't. I don't think you should feel pressured - asking her to do a reading is fine, that way she's involved. It's entirely up to you.

cincy2011

Your gut instinct is right....trust yourself. 

M1ssJ

Trust yourself, Ask her to hostess or read a scripture and keep it moving

rodeo417

Dont second guess yourself. Tell her that you want her to enjoy being a guest and leave it at that. She has no right to question your decision.

LSAS

Totally agree with pp. Trust yourself and stick with your original decision.

mahoganieyes

How rude to even ask you. Keep your original plan.

lil01

You (should) choose your BMs based on who you are close with & envision being beside you on your special day. If she wasn't chosen from the beginning, then you shouldn't regret it & stick with your original decision.

If it continues to bother you, just let it go & let her be a reader.

tyboyd

I thought out my MOH and BM decisions and I'm STILL pissed at myself! So, don't change your mind. AND if you don't REALLY want her to be in the program, you don't have to do that just to make her feel like she's involved. It's not about her.