Wasn't planning a honeymoon

Sara G to be

So we weren't really planning on a honeymoon and when I mention to people they kind of give me a weird "I'm sorry" look. I thought if anything we would somewhere for a night or 2, but we really really don't have the money for anything. Is it weird to not go on a honeymoon? We are fixing up our house and doing lots of DIY construction I just feel a honeymoon would take away from that. Ofcourse I would LOVE to go away. I'm wondering if I should let my mom help more with the cost of the wedding so we can go away. UGH I don't know why I feel like I would be missing out on something if we don't go!!??

MoonlightSilver

Are you taking a few days off from work after the wedding to just relax? You don't need a vacation or to go anywhere, but taking a few days off and staying home might be a good compromise for you. I would not borrow money from anyone just so you can go on a vacation. Putting the money towards the house and wedding makes sense. You can plan an epic vacation for a few years from now.

AddieCake

We are celebrating our one year anniversary this month and haven't taken one yet. We recently moved and my husband started a new job a year ago and was already having to take time off for the wedding and then the move a few months later. We are working on decorating the house, which is more important to us than a honeymoon b/c we will be living here a lot longer than we will be on a vacation. 

We just haven't  had money or time to take an expensive vacation.  Eventually we want to go on a cruise, but it's not the top of our priority list. 

monkeysip

Did your mom offer you money and you turned it down?  Obviously you shouldn't borrow or ask for money for this.  But if she offers, there's nothing wrong in asking her if you could use it for the honeymoon, or use it for the wedding and save money for the honeymoon.

Regardless, if you can't afford a honeymoon, do the best with what you have.  Can you do a cheap minimoon somwhere?  Like, drive to the beach somewhere or stay in a nearby town?  Sometimes it's nice just to get away, even if its nowhere fancy. 

Or have a staycation type honeymoon.  If you can get a few days off work, just relax together in your home and cook candlelight dinners for each other. 

I think before the wedding, a lot of brides get sad at the thought of no honeymoon.  But after the wedding, you're going to be so excited just to finally be married!  Enjoy that, and plan for a delayed honeymoon or awesome first anniversary trip later when you can afford to go.

dazyabbey

I tend to be very blunt and would probably say something like "Luckily we just need each other! The location doesn't matter."

No one should judge. And don't feel ashamed. I would say most people I know do not take honeymoons.

Sara G to be

My mom has offered to help with particular things but she is not doing good finincially so I always say no thank you unless its something I really know she wants to buy. She bought my dress which I new was important for her so I didn't argue. Other things I just have her help with DIY stuff. I guess I was just feeling like maybe I would be missing out, but we did each take some time off from work and will beable to just be with each other so that is good. Thanks ladies! You made me feel better!

alithebride

i think it was right of you to decline your mom's offer for money aside of what she's already done.

if oyu dont want to take one right after the wedding then dont. make an anniversary trip special

Fancypantsamy

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_wasnt-planning-a-honeymoon?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:d300c544-cdcd-4a52-be14-ff392d5aa68bPost:f784ca3f-892c-451e-93ce-4cd3beb9c123">Re: Wasn't planning a honeymoon</a>:
[QUOTE]Go to Niagra Falls for a couple of days.  It's traditional, and sort of kitch.  The falls are gorgeous, and you don't need to fly from New Jersey.  There's also the Poconos.  Your honeymoon doesn't need to be expensive.  We went to Kansas City Crown Center for two days back in the 70's.  My husband still feels nostalgic about it.
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>I agree. Also, the Adirondacks would also be in driving distance from New Jersey and would be so beautiful that time of year, with all the fall leaves. </div>

MrsGandthebeag

What about driving up to the cape for a couple days?  I would say do something that won't cost you a lot.  It'll be nice to get to spend a couple days alone with your new husband and relax.  

allychase

I'm also in NJ and there's TONS of options around here for some weekend getaways. The poconos, NYC, Atlantic City, Cape May, Ocean City (NJ or MD), Niagara Falls-little farther but still doable, Boston, and more. Of course there's nothing wrong with spending some time home RELAXING, which to me sounds amazing right now with 6 weeks left til the wedding and stress at an all time high. Sometimes nothing is more romantic than being in the comfort of your own home with a candlelight dinner, champagne and a bubble bath. 

NOLAbridealmost

You certainly don't have to do a honeymoon! And if its really bugging you, you could always do a staycation or a lower key destination honeymoon to nearby attractions. For me, personally, a honeymoon was really important. I never had a lot of "visions" about my wedding day but I always envisioned jetting off somewhere immediately after the wedding so we specifically cut back on the wedding budget so we could afford to take one and we purposely limited our date selections to those that would allow us to immediately take one, But that was a personal call; you have to do what's right for you. Other people who are giving you flak are likely just projecting their own priorities onto you.