where to start...budget & date?

ladyvaill

...we got engaged on april 29, 2012.  i'm eager to get started with the planning, but we had some family obligations to get through before we even gave it some thought.  i think we're ready now...but we're not really sure where to start.  FH comes from a large family so discussing the budget is difficult (we're paying for the wedding).  any tips on figuring out the budget?

we're also having troubles picking a date...how did you all decide what day you wanted?  we have discussed fall 2013 which would go with a couple themes we've talked about but aren't really sure what day to pick

~d

Summer2011Bride

As for budget, if you and FI are paying, then you two are the ones who should decide. I would definitely not go into debt over a wedding. I'd look at your finances and see what chunk of it you are comfortable spending on a wedding. If this means not inviting everybody in the extended family, that's OK. You might choose to have a very small or intimate wedding and be able to spend more on the food, drinks, venue, etc. rather than having a huge wedding and scrimping. If you do decide to invite everyone, you could have a wedding around 2:00 and just do a cake and punch reception afterward. That's a good way to save on costs. Also look at Friday evenings or Sunday afternoons as those days tend to be cheaper with venues and vendors.

As for dates, we were limited since I'm a teacher. it pretty much had to be in the summer for us. We thought June wouldn't give us enough time to plan (our engagement ended up being only 9 months), and in July a good friend was marrying the 9 who was in our WP, so we gave him time for a HM and time to get settled in before ours by having it on the 23. This gave us time for a HM and whatnot before I had to return to work.

Annas2013

Like above pp said about the budget.  As for the date?  You have to find one that works for the two of you.  My parents said they would help financially with the wedding if we waited until we graduated college.  I'm graduating next May, so that wasn't a huge deal.  That meant it had to be next summer.  The venue we fell in love with had an area for the ceremony outside and an outdoor wedding in SC was not an option for us in July or June.  So May it was.  

julib33

We just chose a date. We knew we wanted Saturday because most of our guests will have to travel, and in the summer so we can be outside. As for budget, we still haven't figured it out yet but we still have a little over 2 years so we aren't in a huge rush.

Just do whatever works for you.

ladyvaill

thanks everyone!

we flip flop back and forth about whether we want a bigger or smaller wedding.  i know if finances weren't an issue, we'd go big and elaborate but i almost feel like most people would.

i guess we need to sit down and talk this through...preferably before we go to the church and scope out venues.

thanks again - i appreciate the help!

~d

fschuller

With our date, we wanted to get as close to our original anniversary (dating-wise) as we could. That date is Nov. 13, but we also wanted an outdoor wedding and an outoor wedding venue in November means the weather would be too unpredictable. So Oct 13 it was. Tah dah. Find a date that's significant to you, be it an anniversary or a parent's anniversary, maybe the anniversary of the day you guys met? Sweet things like that would be nice

kmforet

Out of season (Nov-April) can also be less expensive.  We're hoping to have a short engagement, and venues that still have open dates for the near future are much more willing to negotiate price because they're anxious to book their space.