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first look

iei515iei515
First Comment
in Jewish Weddings
We are having a conservative Jewish wedding, though I still have this fairy-tale dream that my fiancee will see me for the first time as I walk down the aisle. Considering having to take photos, the tisch, and ketubah signing.. is this even possible? Can I sign the ketubah under the chuppah? Does anyone have a creative solution for how to not see each other prior to walking down the aisle? 
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Re: first look

  • Jess111679Jess111679
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Honestly I gave up on this a while ago. We asked our rabbi about signing the ketubah under the chuppah and he said technically you're not supposed to start the marriage ceremony before the ketubah has been signed. You could arrange a first look moment earlier in the day...
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  • LBRM_NJLBRM_NJ member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I know this isn't what you want to hear, but, really, that first time he sees you is going to be special whenever it is.  I loved that we did it when everyone wasn't there watching!  Trust me, it can still be special.  As it turned out, mine actually was done on the aisle.  He was standing in front of the chuppah, with his back to me and I walked down the aisle and met him and then he turned around and saw me.  The location had no significance to me (it could have happened that way anywhere), but, your question just made me remember that that's where it took place!

    Also, if, for some reason, your rabbi allowed you to wait, you would miss out on the bedeken, which, for me, was one of the most beautiful parts of my day.  We did it privately, after the ketubah signing, with just our family and bridal party, but, for me, it was very emotional when my husband-to-be lowered the veil over my face.  Even though there were people around us, it felt very intimate.
    Lisa
    The Knot lost my info, but, I've been married since 6/19/05!
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  • chavanolachavanola member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    It's possible depending on how you schedule your wedding.  I also wanted the first time my husband saw me to be walking down the aisle.  here's what we did--we sat in different rooms during the tisch.  All of our guests flowed between the two rooms, but we each stayed in our own spaces so we wouldn't see each other.  We also took all pictures together after the chuppah.  We took our individual pics with our family beforehand, but took all of the pics that required the two of us together to be taken afterwards.  Also, we're Sephardi so our tradition is actually to sign the ketubah under the chuppah.  Ask your rabbi if you can do so.  I'm not sure if there is an Ashkenazi reason why its preferable to do it the other way, but we had an Ashkenazi rabbi do our wedding and he had no problem with it (we're Orthodox though, I don't know if that makes a difference).

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  • jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    LBRM--thanks for that lovely description of the bedekin.  You just made me look forward to that part a lot more!
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  • october010brideoctober010bride
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Just want to say our "first look" before the wedding was amazing. It was just him and I (and the photog) and we loved it- and got awesome pics.

    And I still cried my eyes out walking down the aisle.
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  • jarynslaby1jarynslaby1
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I know this is late. But I also had that fariy tale dream!! Our Rabbi is letting us sign the Ketubah a day before the wedding (Our Rabbi is very reform) So then the day of we won't see eachother till I walk down the aisle.  I guess it is up to the Rabbi.  But I am so excited about my wedding day!
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  • LBRM_NJLBRM_NJ member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_jewish-weddings_first-look?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:399Discussion:f154612a-4e7c-45e6-b341-59eb61deb260Post:c22291a9-ea06-4759-a21c-3369c05d71cb">Re: first look</a>:
    [QUOTE]LBRM--thanks for that lovely description of the bedekin.  You just made me look forward to that part a lot more!
    Posted by jessicabessica[/QUOTE]

    Aww, you will love it!!
    Lisa
    The Knot lost my info, but, I've been married since 6/19/05!
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker My Blog - "Helping Make Sense"
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  • ellieg31773ellieg31773 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    What about signing the Ketubah in separate rooms with the witnesses and doing the veiling at the Chuppah?
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