Just Engaged and Proposals

I know the ring is coming soon but I don't want to wait!!!

So my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years now and have already discussed our future and wedding plans. It's only been in the last few weeks that we have been seriously discussing our engagement.  He tells me he knows when he is going to do it and how and that it will be soon but I don't think I can wait! I am ready to start planning for REAL and not just pretend planning. I am graduating college in about 3 weeks and I hope he does it by then!  How does everyone who knows the ring is coming soon not go crazy and hold out for him to do it the way he wants to propose???

Re: I know the ring is coming soon but I don't want to wait!!!

  • "Good things come to those that wait"
  • You just have to wait it out!!! If you keep bugging him about it and asking him each day when he's gonna do it he might not feel its as special when he does it. Dont forget guys LOVE the suprise of the fact so even though you know its coming, he still wants to suprise you!
  • I know mine's coming soon too.  The ring is actually currently sitting in our office at home on his desk... but he wants to have a "story" for the proposal.  However, he also told me two nights ago he can't think of what to do haha!  I told him it doesn't have to be a big deal.  But, yea, I'm just waiting... I do really want him to ask so that we can tell everyone & start planning, but I know it'll happen eventually, so I'm not too worried about it.  It's kind of exciting!  Like waiting for Christmas as a kid :)
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  • Ew.  Please don't be 'that girl' who harasses the crap out of her man.  My roommate in college did this - every damn day "When's my ring coming?  I can't wait till we're engaged."  Yeah they're divorced already and we're 27.

    Patience.  I know it's exciting, but he'll propose when he's good and ready.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_ring-coming-soon-but-dont-want-wait?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:d17babde-d86b-41dc-a898-5cf288490b53Post:05c546a4-def6-40b8-841e-0755e4851eee">Re: I know the ring is coming soon but I don't want to wait!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>Ew.  Please don't be 'that girl' who harasses the crap out of her man. </strong> My roommate in college did this - every damn day "When's my ring coming?  I can't wait till we're engaged."  Yeah they're divorced already and we're 27. <strong>Patience.  I know it's exciting, but he'll propose when he's good and ready.</strong>
    Posted by jennylove810[/QUOTE]

    <div>Ditto this. I know a LOT of girls who did this, and they wound up spoiling the engagement for their guys. Just be calm. He wants it to be special, and so do you. So just let him do it his way in his time. Don't get too ancy and PLEASE don't pester him about it. It'll come without you mentioning it to him, promise. :)</div>
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  • You just have to wait.  And do not pester!  It is more fun when it is a surprise!  Just enjoy it...it will happen soon!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_ring-coming-soon-but-dont-want-wait?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:d17babde-d86b-41dc-a898-5cf288490b53Post:0a04f6bb-a060-4ea2-ae85-94ea49a70fc8">I know the ring is coming soon but I don't want to wait!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]So my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years now and have already discussed our future and wedding plans. It's only been in the last few weeks that we have been seriously discussing our engagement.  He tells me he knows when he is going to do it and how and that it will be soon but I don't think I can wait! I am ready to start planning for REAL and not just pretend planning. I am graduating college in about 3 weeks and I hope he does it by then!  How does everyone who knows the ring is coming soon not go crazy and hold out for him to do it the way he wants to propose???
    Posted by aa1293[/QUOTE]


    Enjoy the anticipation. It will never happen again.

    Try focusing on the marriage part, NOT the wedding.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_ring-coming-soon-but-dont-want-wait?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:d17babde-d86b-41dc-a898-5cf288490b53Post:05c546a4-def6-40b8-841e-0755e4851eee">Re: I know the ring is coming soon but I don't want to wait!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ew.  Please don't be 'that girl' who harasses the crap out of her man.  My roommate in college did this - every damn day "When's my ring coming?  I can't wait till we're engaged."  Yeah they're divorced already and we're 27. Patience.  I know it's exciting, but he'll propose when he's good and ready.
    Posted by jennylove810[/QUOTE]
    It was SO SO SO hard for me not to do this.  Especially when my sister got engaged like a month before we did.  I had to set boundaries for myself - I convinced myself that every time I talked about wanting the ring it would push it back a week.  We had an agreement to get engaged by our 2 year anniversary so it was nice to have an end date but omg he still suprised me !  It made it that much more special.  ps - I was so tempted but I found that fake planning made things worse.  Nesting felt better.
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  • Trust me girl, I feel the same way!! My boyfriend basically told me it was happening by the end the summer, and he said he has his plan all figured out, so I'm dying!!! I just keep doing pre-planning stuff (wedding magazines, doing crap like this on theknot lol) to hold me over until the day finally comes! It definitely doesn't help either that both of my best friends are engaged, so I've definitely got the bug! But I have to admit, it was nice to hear someone in agony like I am, lol- good luck!
  • I knew it was coming for a while, and was so excited i couldn't sit still.  After a while, I just chilled out and then when it did come, I was surprised and SO Happy!! Trust me, if it's coming, it's worth the wait because like pp said, it only happens once.  I am so happy but I will always remember that excitement of waiting for it to happen!!!
    imageimageVacation Till our honeymoon!!!
  • I was the exact same way! My FI asked my dad for my hand in marriage in June and then waited until NOVEMBER to propose, I was dying!!! Trust me girl, it's worth the wait.
  • My fiance once told me he was going to propose "soon."  It took him a year and a half.  Please don't be too disappointed if it doesn't happen within the next month.  It will all be worth the wait when it happens!
  • Hi, I am kind of new to the boards here! I have "lurked" since March (when bf and I started ring shopping) but haven't posted much.

    I am in the same position! I know he has the ring and he said he knew I would like to have the summer to plan (I am in medical school) so I feel as if it can happen any moment now.

    Waiting is very very hard but he knows I am all about surprises so I am sure he wants to plan it out just right. My soon-to-be roommate and great friend just got engaged this past weekend! It does make it harder but at least I get to focus on her for a while :)

    I am very excited to have met such an awesome person and I can't believe how much he loves me. I just try to focus on that and it doesn't hurt that medschool demands lots of attention also.

    It was very helpful reading everyone's post and advice. Thanks everyone and hang in there aa1293
  • I know how you feel! My bf asked my dad for his blessing way back in November but my dad said he had to wait until I graduated college. Well I did graduate 2 days ago and the ring is going to be made from a family heirloom diamond. I happen to know the diamond is gone from my parent's house, so I know the ring is in the process of being made, or is already. Also, my bf would always tease me when I'd do hypothetical wedding planning. He'd tell me "you don't even have a ring on your finger yet!" However, at my graduation dinner, he took the initative to bring up wedding ideas and things he would really like to include in the ceremony/reception. I know it's soon, and I can't wait but I also want him to do it when he's ready!
  • raw1299raw1299 member
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Comments 5 Love Its
    same boat as you. I graduate college in a year, and since july (10 months ago) we've been talking about marriiage. I have a tendency to pester him about it too, but that wont make my graduation get here sooner. I guess hes also thinking about himself when he was in college, and he wants me to have a degree and a job so we can advance our relationship. men think differently then we do, he'll propose when he wants to.

    are you two planning a special vacation? maybe you two will get engaged then. appreciate the time you have together, and your relationship. hopefully this is going to be your last and only engagement, so just relax and dont think about it.
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  • I'm in the same boat, and like others we have a "time line". Us getting engaged is being delayed because his younger sister is getting married in June, and she wanted to have "her time". (Don't get me started.) With all the wedding talk, I can't help but bring it up sometimes. He promised I will get it within three months after her wedding. Having the "deadline" makes it better and worse- I know it's coming, but I can't wait! Right now I'm just trying to stay calm and not bug him about it. I know it will come when he's ready, and I just don't want to be "that girl" that hounds him every day for my ring. (Which is why, as soon as he goes home at night, I jump on the Knot and quietly indulge myself!)
  • His best friend started dating his now wife a few months before we started dating and they are married and have a baby.  His other really good friend started dating 5 months after us and they have been married almost 8 months.  My sister started dating her fiance a year and a half after us and they have been engaged for 5 months getting married in the fall.  It's been 2 1/2 years for us.  I think it wouldn't be as big of a deal, because 2 1/2 years really isn't that bad, if people who started dating after us weren't already married.  I know he wants to marry me because he has said as much but the waiting sucks.  Some days I am so gung ho about not saying anything and all determined to wait it out, and some days I just can't keep my mouth shut I'm so annoyed, but I usually wind up upset so that doesn't help me either.
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  • I know everyone says, "Be patient, don't bug him, etc." but it's really hard not to.

    If a guy is that hung up on surprising his girlfriend, it has to actually be a surprise. And if, like us, you've been together half a decade and talked about what you want for your wedding and gone looking at rings together and you know he's asked your dad, then it's not a surprise anymore, it's just nervewracking. Because we do get insecure; we start to wonder if he changed his mind, or if he's not really sure. Once you take those beginning steps, you owe it to your girlfriend to follow through in a timely manner.

    After about two years, it's not really a huge surprise anymore. No girl could honestly say, "We'd been dating for three years, I never saw it coming, it was such a huge surprise!" because we're not going to spend three years on someone we haven't seriously considered marrying. Not when our biological nonsense comes with an expiration date.

    If you want to surprise your girlfriend with a proposal, you can't let her know it's coming. No talking about weddings or looking at rings. And if you spoil the surprise early and then regret it, I don't think we should be held responsible for it.
  • I am in the same boat...BF and I have been together for 6 years!!! I know how you feel... We went to pick out the ring a few weeks ago..and now it is sitting in a drawer.. The suspense is killing me... just knowing it is there... I know he wants the engagement to be something memorable...not only for me but for him too... We are both still finishing up school so if/when the engagement does come it will be a lengthy one... but I've alrady expressed I dont mind a long engagement..It will allow me to plan at my own pace and also complete the DIY projects I already have in mind...

    Hang in there the time will come...and when it does you will be so happy.. you won't even remember the wait
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