Bridal Shower

felicia220 · March 2010

I am thinking this is an etiquette thing but not sure. So I already know when my shower is and it lands on the same day as a "Flatland Jam" (Flatland is a form of BMX bike riding, which my FI loves) No one knows except my FI and my brother that I figured out when the shower is. Fi will be there to bring me and greet everyone and thank them for coming. But if he goes to the "Jam" he will not be there at the end to help with the gifts. I don't mind this AT ALL. I feel that I will be having this great shower and enjoying the day, so why shouldn't he be doing something he loves.

Now for the Problem: Our mothers. My mom doesn't know about this but he called his mom and asked if she minded and she said yes (long story short). I know that both our mothers will feel that he should be there, but if I don't care, should they? What do you girls think? And do you think there is anyway I can make this happen for him?

TIA

felicia220 · March 2010

Not that they want him to stay for the whole time, but they want him to come back at the end. The "Jam" is a half hour a way and will be in full swing at the end of the shower, so I don't want him to leave to have to come load up a car. That just seems silly, being that he will have already thanks the guest for coming and for their gifts.

He said he will just not go to the "Jam" and find something to do while the shower is going on. I just feel bad that he has to do that, when I don't mind if he isn't there to help afterwards. What bothers us is that this wedding has become more about our families then us. We have to fight for the things that we want and it is just frustrating. And this is just another one of those things. I feel like if I don't care then they shouldn't care either. GRRR

MyNameIsNot · March 2010

That's ridiculous to expect him to give up his whole day just to come load gifts after a shower. He should be able to spend the day doing something fun, too.

Besides, if they wanted to be sure he was available, they should have cleared the date with him ahead of time. He should go to the thing and have a good time.

ring_pop · March 2010

I think they're being silly, especially if YOU don't care... but I'd leave it to them to figure out.

janedoe1113a · March 2010

It's stupid for him to come to the end if he has something else to do.

felicia220 · March 2010

Thanks girls, We have tried very hard to make everyone happy, and that they at least get one thing they want out of the wedding. But I think with this one I am going to have to put my foot down. The only problem is that there is nothing I can do until the day of! I have to wait another month before this even happens. I would hope that they won't fight with me the day of the shower.

kkchisholm · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bridal-shower-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:df3498c4-f240-4c49-81d7-83b63c03832cPost:78a5c258-5e9a-432b-b26c-e946da7f7db4">Re: Bridal Shower</a>:
[QUOTE]Not that they want him to stay for the whole time, but they want him to come back at the end.
Posted by felicia220[/QUOTE]

That is probably one of the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard... just have him go to his jam thing...you can handle the gifts.

whitneykaye87 · March 2010

Ha! FI made sure he was busy on the day of my shower. He left to go golfing about an hour before it began. No one missed him.

Especially if the mothers don't expect him to do anything but show up for the end, I don't see a reason for him to miss out on something else.

Bridal Shower

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