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Pre-wedding Parties

Engagement Party Invites...I'm lost.

Okay, so apparently my MOH and one of my bridesmaids are planning an e-party for my fiance and I. I'm the first in our group to get engaged so none of us have any experience with this stuff whatsoever. My MOH asked me for a list of who I'd like there and I asked if there was a number I should stay around or under. She asked if seventy-five was doable. I said it should be. That's a hundred people less than I'm inviting to the wedding, so that's a stretch, but if they're being nice enough to throw us a party, I'm obviously not going to split hairs. Anywho, I asked if I should put children on the list. She consulted with the bridesmaid and said no. I mentioned that I have my two junior bridesmaids and that I'd feel sort of rude not inviting them. She said "Well, they'll be invited the shower, right? I feel like engagement parites are more adult." So I asked what age I should cut people off at and she said it was entirely up to me.

Well, I only have two family members under eighteen, one of whom is in the wedding, and the other has siblings who are over the age of eighteen so she would be the only one in her family not invited. 

Now that I've written a mini-novel, my questions are these:
1- Is it rude to only invite less than half of the wedding guests to the engagement party? (Not that I would ever dream of forcing the issue, I guess I'm just curious)
2- Is it okay to invite kids to an engagement party? (My Jr Bridesmaids are 10 and 12 and my under-eighteen cousin is sixteen, if that matters)
3- Would it be extremely rude of me to ask the people who are throwing this party for me to include those three "children" as to avoid offending anyone in my family?

Yes, I know I'm overthinking this. It's just who I am. 
Thanks in advance!

Re: Engagement Party Invites...I'm lost.

  • edited December 2011
    1-Is it rude to only invite less than half of the wedding guests to the engagement party?
     Engagement parties are not for everyone invited to the wedding. It is usually wedding party, family, and close friends that are invited.
    2- Is it okay to invite kids to an engagement party?
    I am curious why they would say no to kids. is the location not appropriate for kids? The wedding party is typically invited to the engagement party.
    3- Would it be extremely rude of me to ask the people who are throwing this party for me to include those three "children" as to avoid offending anyone in my family?
    They are throwing the engagement party for you and your FI. If you guys have family and wedding party under age, as long as the location is appropriate and you want them there, they should be there.

    GOOD LUCK!!!!!
  • JCM10JCM10 member
    Third Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I always thought engagement parties were for the two sides to get to know each other better, and I definitely never thought of them as adult only events (although I've never been to one)
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