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In rememberance

Play getawayPlay getaway member
100 Comments
in New York
Just updating b/c i know that ppl asked for me to let them know.
First off, thank you to everyone who showed support and shared their prayers for me and my family regarding my Cousin during his time in the hospital.   Especially that you guys are total strangers,  really,  I appreciate it.

My cousin was taken off life support on Wednesday after being diagnosed as brain damaged.  No one was sure if he would still live after it or just be brain damaged, unfortunately he passed away on Thursday. 
We had the funeral service on Sunday in Virginia and just got back last night.

Both FI & I have had a lot of family deaths over the years together and have thought about doing something in our wedding but havent given it more thought than that until recently.
I've seen and read a few things for it l;ike leaving open chairs with their names, putting a flower on the chair, or carrying one for each person, and having a momment of silence but i'm looking for some other ideas that could be more meaningful without having to list everyone's names (it'd be long).
     Does anyone have any more ideas?


This is was my Cousin Dan with his daughter Leah



  Me playing with Leah yesterday.  3 1/2 yr old


 it was so sad to leave her as she said  "Please don't go cousin Gina"  ugh.  heartbreaking.
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Re: In rememberance

  • DondadaTimes2DondadaTimes2
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am so so sorry for your loss. I know if cant be easy and right now nothing anyone says can truly take the pain away, but you and your family will be in my prayers.

    As far as "In Memory" goes, Ive seen empty tables with a photo of each of the deceased where the plates would be. My FSIL had a possession of each of the deceased (handkerchief, necklace, etc). Josh and I are donating money to either Make-A-Wish or American Cancer Society in rememberance of his neice and my grandfather (if we do ACS). We've played with the idea of having the vases at the head table that will hold the girls flowers etched saying "In memory of..."

    Just a few. I know it can be a bit harder with a lot of people (we only have 3).

    People are inherently stupid. Weddings make it painfully obvious -- KevinandMonica
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  • kevinandmonica2011kevinandmonica2011 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am so sorry for your loss.  May he be at peace.

    I am sure that he will be with you in spirit on your wedding day, as well as the others who have passed.

    I think that the ideas you suggested are lovely.  I know many brides also do the memory candle, which I think is very sweet.  I think anything you choose to do in rememberance will be beautiful.

    Again, I am sorry for your loss.
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  • acmj11acmj11
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry to hear about your cousin, may he rest in peace.  It's a very sweet idea to honor loved ones at your wedding.  At my aunt's wedding, I carried a white rose for my grandmother and my other aunt carried a white rose for her father.  We weren't in the wedding but we carried them as we walked in. We put them up front at some point but it was a while back.  I don't remember the specific details.
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  • sbolger17sbolger17 member
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry about your cousin.  I think a memorial candle is a great idea or having special flowers or something small like that.  Also, the minister/officiant could mention them in a prayer or something.

    For me, having something like empty chairs with flowers on them would be too much of a sad reminder.  You want to honor those people, but it's not a memorial for them; it's your wedding!  It's supposed to be a happy time. 

    My father passed away eight years ago and we are planning to either have a memorial candle or have a mention in the program (but not both).  We're also going to put wedding pictures of our grandparents (some are deceased; some are not) and our parents on a table at the reception.  I'm not sure if that would necessarily work for you, but it's an idea.
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