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logistics issue with decorating

myname1234myname1234
500 Comments
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

We are renting one building for the ceremony (upstairs) and reception/cocktail hour (downstairs and outside).

For the low low price of $3600, we could have booked the space for Friday night.   OR we could have waited until 60 days out and book it, assuming it was still open, for $120.      We gambled and lost.  The space was rented today.

I have a bunch of decorating to do (the place is EXTREMELY plain on it's own but gorgeous when "done up"), and unfortunately I can't afford to hire someone to do it.  

I refuse to go bridezilla and demand my bridal party and family come in at 8am to help me hang everything.  I'm also realistic enough to know FI and I can't get it all done by ourselves in time. 

WWYD?  Can I ask for help?  That even seems skeevy to me.

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Re: logistics issue with decorating

  • ceh789ceh789 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    Where is your wedding?  I'll help.  I'm entirely serious.  PM me.
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  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    ceh's so sweet!

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  • myname1234myname1234
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_logistics-issue-with-decorating?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3a77a5cf-4252-4355-b853-4d241a684a1fPost:efb98fba-5cb7-4fc5-9e3d-0dbd4c46b4ea">Re: logistics issue with decorating</a>:
    [QUOTE]Where is your wedding?  I'll help.  I'm entirely serious.  PM me.
    Posted by ceh789[/QUOTE]

    it's in Grand Ledge Michigan...which means i DO have a captive audience.  My family is all from MN and flying in the night before.

    I appreciate the offer though :) 
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  • ceh789ceh789 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    edited March 2012
    Well that won't work then.

    Who do you know in Grand Ledge that can help you track down some college students?  I bet you could find some students for $50 each who would be happy to do it.

    Other idea is to call a temp agency and see if they could staff someone to do it.
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  • myname1234myname1234
    500 Comments
    that may be an idea.  FI son's is in college at MSU.  Maybe some of his friends would be willing to help.

    Of course, i'm almost back up to decorating house fees at that point. 

    i'm secretly hoping the wedding that just booked for Friday moves or gets canceled.  :)
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  • MattsPenguinMattsPenguin member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    Alternatively, you could look into a wedding planner / coordinator.  My used one (not just day of) and she (along with her staff) did all of the decoration for my reception.  It saved us tons of money on centerpieces.  Of course, we did pay her for her services.

    Can you get in the night before?

     
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  • ceh789ceh789 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_logistics-issue-with-decorating?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3a77a5cf-4252-4355-b853-4d241a684a1fPost:c50cf353-f0f5-44ce-895f-35cf4da65bca">Re: logistics issue with decorating</a>:
    [QUOTE]that may be an idea.  FI son's is in college at MSU.  Maybe some of his friends would be willing to help. <strong>Of course, i'm almost back up to decorating house fees at that point.</strong>  i'm secretly hoping the wedding that just booked for Friday moves or gets canceled.  :)
    Posted by myname1234[/QUOTE]
    How much decorating are we talking about?  You had $120 budgeted for doing it Friday night, right?  If you, FI and 3 college students can do it in 2 hours you can pay them $40 each - MANY college students would be thrilled to get $40 cash for 2 hours of work.
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  • aragx6aragx6 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I've helped a couple of friends with their weddings and while it's hardly the most fun thing in the world it's also far from the worst. I agree that you can't conscript your friends into service, but if it were me and I truly couldn't afford to hire anyone (which is clearly the best option) I would tell my friends this exact story and see if they offer. If they offer, I see no reason you can't accept.
    Lizzie
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  • myname1234myname1234
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_logistics-issue-with-decorating?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3a77a5cf-4252-4355-b853-4d241a684a1fPost:d544c35b-ca82-4236-b03e-fa5b697aef31">Re: logistics issue with decorating</a>:
    [QUOTE]Alternatively, you could look into a wedding planner / coordinator.  My used one (not just day of) and she (along with her staff) did all of the decoration for my reception.  It saved us tons of money on centerpieces.  Of course, we did pay her for her services. <strong>Can you get in the night before?</strong>  
    Posted by MattsPenguin[/QUOTE]

    nope.  that was the original plan.  But now that the other party booked, we're out until 8am Saturday morning.
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  • myname1234myname1234
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_logistics-issue-with-decorating?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3a77a5cf-4252-4355-b853-4d241a684a1fPost:b9294522-4839-4771-8d1b-ab12f153235b">Re: logistics issue with decorating</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: logistics issue with decorating : How much decorating are we talking about?  You had $120 budgeted for doing it Friday night, right?  If you, FI and 3 college students can do it in 2 hours you can pay them $40 each - MANY college students would be thrilled to get $40 cash for 2 hours of work.
    Posted by ceh789[/QUOTE]

    Good point about the $120 saved.  I didn't think of that!

    As far as how much....short answer:  lots.  The top 2 are for upstairs.  We'll also need to set a big "curtain" in front, anchor the aisle runner and set up the shepard hooks. 

    The bottom two are for the reception space.  It's kind of a combo between these (pomanders, crystals and lighting)...but not so 1980s prom.  I couldn't find a better picture for the dance floor lights.   Plus we'll need to get the tables set.  The caterers will bring in the plates, but they won't fold the linens with the menu cards nor put out the mini wine bottles on each place setting.


    <a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/1/8/71476e8d-8744-4962-88db-dbac6472cabb.large.jpg" title="Click to view a larger photo" class="PhotoLink"><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/1/8/71476e8d-8744-4962-88db-dbac6472cabb.medium.jpg" alt="" /></a>
    .  Hopefully the pictures come through.
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  • ceh789ceh789 member
    1000 Comments First Anniversary
    edited March 2012
    Mmm.. that's a lot of decorating.  I still think you can get it done though.  You're going to need a heck of a plan and several additional college students.  Try to task it out and estimate # of minutes each thing should take then figure out how many bodies you're going to need.  You can do this.  I think my college student plan is the way to go, even if you need to cut back on # of pomanders or something to pay them.  Gangpressing guests is just not right and yes, if you tell them your sob story they will offer.  It's still not right.

    ETA:  If you have to - pick up extra hours at work or mystery shop or something to earn the extra dollars before then.  You can do it :)
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  • ElisabethJoanneElisabethJoanne member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited March 2012
    This might be a minority opinion, but I think it's OK to ask people to do wedding-related things if they're the same kind of thing you'd ask them to do at normal times. I've asked family to help with set-up and clean-up for Christmas parties I've hosted and they've attended. They've been happy to do so. It's what family is for, in my family. Non-professional decorating is not so common a wedding-planning activity you can expect people to bring it up sua sponte, but I think it's fine to mention your issue to those closest to you, and see if they volunteer, or even ask how they feel about helping.

    Emphasis on the closest. I guess one way of saying it is it's a HUGE VIOLATION OF ETIQUETTE to ask for help decorating, but so is vomiting in a guest's presence, yet there are a few people in my life I'm close enough to I can call them to bring me medicine or soup when I'm sick. Indeed, there are a few who are hurt when I suffer alone when they could help.
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  • afeliz79afeliz79 member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    I agree with ElisabethJoanne. I know if I even heard of a family member with this kind of problem I would offer to help out. I would imagine Moms and Dads would be around to help since you said they will have flown in.
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  • JaxInBlueJaxInBlue member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Name Dropper
    I'm also of the mind that when your closest friends and family ask you how wedding planning is going, you can explain your dilemma to them and accept help if it is offered. 

    We did a lot of our own decorating.  Originally, the plan was me, FI and my mom to set up at our venue but when others heard what our need was, several additional people volunteered.  It was one of those things that we just answered honestly when people asked us how things were going in the month or so before; we just said we were working out how we were going to decorate the ballroom.

    I don't think being honest about your needs and accepting help if offered is wrong.  You can always spring for breakfast for those who help.

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  • myname1234myname1234
    500 Comments
    thanks all.


    I think my first approach will be ask future step-son if he hstas any friends that would like to earn a few bucks.  If not. i'll let my family and closest friends help if they volunteer.  i'm sure there will be a conversation about morning of activities.  When i say something to the effect of "I'm going to decorate at 8am" i may have a few volunteers.  i'll definately bring in breakfast if that's the case.

    now to figure out  what kind of rehersal dinner i will have if we don't actually have a rehearsal the night before :/  and where!  45 people is a bit crowd for Friday night reservations.
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  • schweetiecschweetiec member
    10 Comments First Anniversary
    My gf getting married in may said the same thing to me I'm in tHd wedding party my response was " no way in hell you're decorating the morning of your wedding ! If you trust me I'll be there at the crack of dawn ". I agree don't solicit family but why not ask / tell your best friend !! ? What day is the wedding ? I'm in novi, Lansing is an hour away but I'm moving to KY shortly tbd . I'd offer my brothers help free if charge but they move slow ... Lol
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