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Pre-wedding Parties
who should throw my bachlorette party?
hey all
so i recently got into a pretty bad falling out with my would be MOH and now have no one to throw my bachlorette party. i feel bad asking my sister in laws to throw me one and i feel wierd throwing myself one...any thoughts?
thanks!
so i recently got into a pretty bad falling out with my would be MOH and now have no one to throw my bachlorette party. i feel bad asking my sister in laws to throw me one and i feel wierd throwing myself one...any thoughts?
thanks!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: who should throw my bachlorette party?
[QUOTE]I disagree. Many of the who pays rules have become much more lax. And you only get married once. If you want to have a bachlorette part have one. Why miss out on the chance. Or talk to your other friends about really wanting one and explain your position. I think it would be so sad if you didn't get to have the party you want just because of some REALLY old rules. I am an etiquette queen but I just think it would be silly to miss your party because of tradition. It's not like you're even asking for gifts
Posted by Heather Wood[/QUOTE]
Just because etiquette has been around for awhile doens't mean it is out of date or should be ingored. It's rude to throw a party for yourself and even ruder to ask someone to throw a party for you. As banana said, it's perfectly fine to invite friends for a girls' night out. But you can't plan your own bachelorette party and invite your friends to come pay for your entertainment.
There's nothing that says a bride has to have a bachelorette party. You aren't owed a bachelorette party.
[QUOTE]I disagree. Many of the who pays rules have become much more lax. And you only get married once. If you want to have a bachlorette part have one. Why miss out on the chance. Or talk to your other friends about really wanting one and explain your position. I think it would be so sad if you didn't get to have the party you want just because of some REALLY old rules. I am an etiquette queen but I just think it would be silly to miss your party because of tradition. It's not like you're even asking for gifts
Posted by Heather Wood[/QUOTE]
There is nothing modern or in good taste about asking your friends to throw a party for you at their expense.
You can have a great girls night out as long as you say, "Let's go out this Saturday! I'm getting married in 3 weeks and would love to have a girls night out before the big day! What sounds like a good place in everyone's budget?"
That's fine - what isn't is saying, "Oh friend, I just wish SOMEONE would throw me a bachelorette....hint hint."
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: who should throw my bachlorette party? : Just because etiquette has been around for awhile doens't mean it is out of date or should be ingored. It's rude to throw a party for yourself and even ruder to ask someone to throw a party for you. As banana said, it's perfectly fine to invite friends for a girls' night out. But you can't plan your own bachelorette party and invite your friends to come pay for your entertainment. There's nothing that says a bride has to have a bachelorette party. You aren't owed a bachelorette party.
Posted by SaraAndrew2010[/QUOTE]
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</div><div>I agree you are not owed a party... but if you are paying for it why not get to have all the cute Bacherlorette party stuff you want...yes if you are hosting it you pay for it. Why miss your one chance because your MOH was lame</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: who should throw my bachlorette party? : I agree you are not owed a party... but if you are paying for it why not get to have all the cute Bacherlorette party stuff you want...yes if you are hosting it you pay for it. <strong>Why miss your one chance because your MOH was lame</strong>
Posted by Heather Wood[/QUOTE]
*headdesk*
What part of "you're not owed a bachelorette party." do you not understand? You can't have it both ways...saying that you're not owed a party, but then saying you should throw your own because otherwise you'll "miss your one chance." Even if you pay for it yourself, it's in bad taste and very egocentric to throw a party in your own honor. I agree with PPs...the OP (if she doesn't get one) can initiate a hang-out time with the girls before her wedding, but don't call it a bachelorette party, because again, you should not throw parties in your own honor.
There may be many reasons why someone may not get a bachelorette party, and it's not necessarily that the MOH is "lame." That's a little presumptuous on your part. Besides, the OP has quite a bit of time before her wedding and is jumping the gun anyway...who knows, the BP could be planning things and to plan her own bachelorette would take away from something they may already be planning. And if she doesn't get a bachelorette party, then it's okay to feel disappointed, but don't tell the WP or indicate it to them, and just move on with life. We don't always get everything we want, and we're not entitled to it either.
ETA: I also agree too that the OP shouldn't be worried about the bachelorette anyway. I hope she values the friendship enough to try to mend that, though honestly I wonder considering the first thing that came to mind after her fight with her friend was worrying about who would throw her a party. I know it's easy to get into wedding mode...I get that...but seriously she needs to get her priorities straight.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: who should throw my bachlorette party? : I agree you are not owed a party... but if you are paying for it why not get to have all the cute Bacherlorette party stuff you want...yes if you are hosting it you pay for it. Why miss your one chance because your MOH was lame
Posted by Heather Wood[/QUOTE]
Heather - you are missing some very big points.
A bachelorette party is thrown in your honor. That means you'd be throwing a party to celebrate... you! That is why it's inappropriate. I would personally side-eye anyone who would throw a party in their own honor. It's just tacky.
Second, my bachelorette party was really just a night of bar-hopping. We didn't do anything I wouldn't do as a married woman. It was no different than countless drunken nights in college, so the only difference was that it had a label.