So we are still in the planning stages (and have been for awhile since we are both still in grad school and are saving up money for a wedding and a house), and are starting to get cold feet about a reception lol.
We both are pretty shy laidback people and hate large social gatherings along with dancing. However, we both still want friends, family, and coworkers to all be invited to our wedding. We just don't care to have a long wedding (i think 4 hours is around what we can handle including a ceremony lol) with a lot of dancing and speeches (when we get a dj/band, I won't have him/her initiate someone to make a speech unless a guest insists on doing it).
What would be a good compromise for what we want? We definitely want to invite friends, families, and coworkers,wedding cake, open bar, do the Hora (we are Jewish and like it), along with a first dance, beautiful decor and lighting, and have an evening wedding.
I know about throwing a small reception at a restaurant but we probably would have a guest list of over 65 people. I still want it to have a wedding feel to it though. Our theme is desert oasis.
What would be some ideas you could help me with? This is what I have so far-
a. Cake and punch reception with some appetizers and alcohol
b. Have a dinner buffet, but have a later ceremony so it won't be as long of a day. Skip a cocktail hour too and just have open bar served at dinner.
For entertaiment, I am thinking it would be fun and nice just to have a Klezmer band there instead of a dj actually.
Re: Wedding for a couple that doesn't like large formal weddings?
How many people are you thinking? I imagine a large restaurant could do a party of up to 100 or so people, at least.
Maybe try an alternative venue, like an art museum, or even do a hotel - they can certainly accomodate a lot of people in a ballroom and have decent food from the hotel restaurant or outside caterer.
You might want to have a separate room for the formal dances (seating for everyone) and have a separate dinner if you're not into too much DJ/dancing stuff.
I'd not a huge dancer, so I'll probably do a first dance as far as the "formal" dances go, and that's it. No booty-shaking club music here. You can do whatever kind of music suits you.
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We are still looking around at venues. We are probably going to have an oudoor evening wedding and ceremony. I used to like the idea of a brunch wedding, but I just love in pictures that I have seen of twinkle lights and a fire in a pit outside.
You could also cut down on the spotlight moments, and just make it into more of a general party atmosphere. That's what we're doing with ours; the only major thing we're doing is the cake cutting, and we'll just spend the rest of the evening mingling and enjoying the food.
This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.
Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
Cake and punch reception just doensn't really go with an evening wedding. If you want an evening wedding, then you pretty much have to serve some kind of meal, or at least heavy appetizers.
You might consider a cocktail style reception, or a finger food buffet. Maybe just beer and wine, and a signature drink or two. LImiting the alcohol will also help keep the reception shorter. Unlimited free booze encourages guests to stay and drink longer.
For my daughter's wedding, we a brief "cocktail hour" (about 30 minutes while they took photos) of simple appetizers, beer, and wine. Then a simple buffet dinner.
There were about 100 guests. We combined the receiving line with the buffet line. It gave us a chance to greet all the guests, and also kept the line moving quickly. If you are shy, this might be a good compromise, because it keeps your interaction with guests brief.
There was a DJ, some dancing, the requisite photo and a couple of special dances. The ceremony was roughly 5-6 pm, the reception started about 6:30 and was wrapping up by 9-9:30 pm. But the ceremony and reception was in the same location.
When looking at weddings at home, we came really close to booking a local Zoo - it was just so fun and unique. We also looked at some of those sightseeing yacht tour companies, thinking a wedding on the lake would be unique and fun.
Honestly, I can imagine you doing a total "Israel" theme - the desert oasis decor with foods typically served at an Israeli wedding. Do the Israeli traditions (whatever they may be) and your guests will be so into the new experience that they probably won't even realize you're not into all the traditional American wedding stuff. GL and have fun!