my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything

nekyah2003 · May 2012

Ok my sister and I are not "best friends" but, she is my sister. I made her a bridesmaid in my wedding. i am not sure if i should omit her from the wedding because she is not taking things seriously and i have to hound her for everything. For example, she ordered her dress 2weeks after everyone else, she missed my bridal meet and greet, and she has not ordered her shoes. She called me on the day of the meet and greet and hour after it began and asked if i were picking her up! Are you serious!??? This has been a little over a month ago she has not mentioned anything about the wedding do you think it would be harsh to delete her from the party although she has purchased her dress?

ricksang · May 2012

Fuccck yeah it would be harsh and I'd plan for a bad relationship with your sister from now on.

Snippylynn · May 2012

Bahahaha... you had a bridal meet and greet? Dude, I wouldn't have gone to that either.

If you want to ruin your relationship with your sister over stupid crap like this, then go right ahead.

crnflkgirl75 · May 2012

She doesn't have to be a part of anything. She just has to show up in the dress on your wedding day. You did buy the shoes for your party, right?

adamar15 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:7732c8d7-e683-4b54-8885-a44222a86b0c">my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok my sister and I are not "best friends" but, she is my sister. I made her a bridesmaid in my wedding. i am not sure if i should omit her from the wedding because she is not taking things seriously and i have to hound her for everything. For example, she ordered her dress 2weeks after everyone else, she missed my bridal meet and greet, and she has not ordered her shoes. She called me on the day of the meet and greet and hour after it began and asked if i were picking her up! Are you serious!??? This has been a little over a month ago she has not mentioned anything about the wedding <strong>do you think it would be harsh to delete her from the party although she has purchased her dress?
</strong>Posted by nekyah2003[/QUOTE]

Uh, yes. I think you're expecting a little too much from her. I'm going to go ahead and throw out the old party line here: all she needs to do is show up in her dress and be somewhat sober. Anything else is extra.

egm900 · May 2012

Yes, unless you don't want to have a good relationship with your sister ever again. Asking someone to step down from the bridal party is considered in bad taste, and should only be done if they have done something totally egregious (think sleep with your FI). Your wedding is going to be the most important thing to you, but probably not your sister. One of my friend's said "I understand this is going to be one of the best days of my life, but to you, it's Friday."

I have to think you knew of this possibility since it's your sister, so either she's always been this way or there was some miscommunication somewhere on the pick up for the meet and greet. Bridal party members are really only required to purchase the dress/shoes and show up at the wedding, everything else is optional.

gurrlballa10 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:38ed736e-ef98-4031-a8fc-cbfa6821468f">Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes, unless you don't want to have a good relationship with your sister ever again. Asking someone to step down from the bridal party is considered in bad taste, and should only be done if they have done something totally egregious (think sleep with your FI). Your wedding is going to be the most important thing to you, but probably not your sister. One of my friend's said "I understand this is going to be one of the best days of my life, but to you, it's Friday." I have to think you knew of this possibility since it's your sister, so either she's always been this way or there was some miscommunication somewhere on the pick up for the meet and greet. Bridal party members are really only required to purchase the dress/<strong>shoes</strong> and show up at the wedding, everything else is optional.
Posted by egm900[/QUOTE]

No to the bolded. They purchase a dress and stand up for you...that's all that is required. You want anything else, you pay. Hell, mine didn't even show up sober.

aragx6 · May 2012

What in the hell is a bridal meet and greet?

No I don't think you should "delete" her from your wedding.

Alls she needs to do is order the dress (which she did) and show up to your wedding (which hasn't happened yet).

Chill the eff out.

scurtis07 · May 2012

yikes, don't kick her out! My 19 year old sister is my maid of honor and she is a disaster, so I just stay on her. So check in with her! I had to pick my sister up for the dress fittings, sounds like you're just going to have to do the same.

Don't forget that no one cares as much about your wedding as you do. And it is one day, your sister will still be there even when it's over.

egm900 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:47d1502c-e562-4b97-a0ed-40d087cf3b5e">Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything : No to the bolded. They purchase a dress and stand up for you...that's all that is required. You want anything else, you pay. Hell, mine didn't even show up sober.
Posted by gurrlballa10[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I learn something new every day.

</div>

jemmini6 · May 2012

She ordered the dress, that's the extent of her responsibilities to this point. The only one she has left to fulfill is to show up on your wedding day wearing said dress, pose for pictures, and stand with you during your ceremony. That's it.

A bridal meet & greet sounds like torture, I wouldn't have gone either. Your bridesmaids do not need to be best friends, they don't even have to meet. You can't get upset that she didn't attend something that is not mandatory.

If you are requiring her to get specific shoes, YOU need to be paying for them, and therefore ordering them, so that's on you if she doesn't have them.

Lastly, yes, it would be harsh and would ruin your relationship with your sister if you "delete" (<--could you be any more impersonal? Delete?? Seriously?) from your wedding party.

pkontk · May 2012

She ordered her dress 2 weeks after everyone else? Who cares? She ordered it, didn't she?

She is your sister. You cannot "omit" her or "delete" her from your wedding party without serious repercussions.

melanieky · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:f2a489b8-350b-4e5f-bc03-63ebecf687ea">Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>What in the hell is a bridal meet and greet?</strong> No I don't think you should "delete" her from your wedding. Alls she needs to do is order the dress (which she did) and show up to your wedding (which hasn't happened yet). Chill the eff out.
Posted by aragx6[/QUOTE]

This is what I want to know... Like a meeting and greeting with everyone in the bridal party?

And yeah you cannot omit her from the bridal party, she has no other obligations but to buy the dress and show up on time to the wedding.

QueerFemme · May 2012

Yeah... I agree with everyone else... you are being ridiculous. I wouldn't have attended a meet & greet either. Your BMs will meet and greet everyone on your wedding day. That's enough. And also agree with PPs. If you are requiring specific shoes, you have to pay for them.

nekyah2003 · June 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:1ee5f56e-2dec-4dd9-850c-0acde1d33336">Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]Bahahaha... you had a bridal meet and greet? Dude, I wouldn't have gone to that either. If you want to ruin your relationship with your sister over stupid crap like this, then go right ahead.
Posted by Snippylynn[/QUOTE]

why wouldnt you go to an event that is being thrown for the bride? All of the girls did not know one another. Why would you just have them show up on the day of and not know who is whom? If you were( my sister) were throwing a fit because you were not going to be in my wedding in the first place? I only wanted the MOH and BM with my FH and I. I Think you are being very rude!

nekyah2003 · June 2012

A bridal meet and greet is when the bridal party ie bridesmaids meet one another.They all do not know one another. There was a bridal party meet and greet( hence the name) so that they could get aquinted with one another. Now, you chill the "eff out".

in Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:f2a489b8-350b-4e5f-bc03-63ebecf687ea">Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]What in the hell is a bridal meet and greet? No I don't think you should "delete" her from your wedding. Alls she needs to do is order the dress (which she did) and show up to your wedding (which hasn't happened yet). Chill the eff out.
Posted by aragx6[/QUOTE]

nekyah2003 · June 2012

Thanks for the advice! I guess ill be baby sitting my older sister. Ill be glad when it's over and you are correct. "no one cares as much about your wedding as you do."

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_my-sister-is-a-bridesmaid-and-has-not-been-apart-of-anything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9b299c91-39f9-4b76-bada-6923412fe3dePost:1c47fbf5-34b3-45dc-8a2b-bc0a3e1e6ff3">Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything</a>:
[QUOTE]yikes, don't kick her out! My 19 year old sister is my maid of honor and she is a disaster, so I just stay on her. So check in with her! I had to pick my sister up for the dress fittings, sounds like you're just going to have to do the same. Don't forget that no one cares as much about your wedding as you do. And it is one day, your sister will still be there even when it's over.
Posted by scurtis07[/QUOTE]

nekyah2003 · June 2012

Everyone!!! I did not come up with the Meet n Greet They DiD!!!!!!!

Ok i get it!! DO NOT OMIT HER!

my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything

Re: my sister is a bridesmaid and has not been apart of anything

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