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I need to VENT

ChiefsbunnyChiefsbunny
in Pennsylvania-Philadelphia

Ahhhh so stressed out. I made a huge mistake and as soon as I got enaged I told 7 girls I wanted them as bridesmaids they all accepted! At a moment of weakness my fiancees oldest sister was crying and seemed really down so I asked her to be my maid of honor. She is like the maid of honorzilla!!! She is either taking over everything completely, doesnt care at all, or telling me how all the things I want are not how it should be done. Like one minute she is telling me how I need to do things the cheapest way *even though I know thats right because I am a budget bride* even if it comprises my happiness. I am so stressed, I don't know how to handle it. I wish I could just avoid her but my fiancee and I live with her! We were living with her to help her out with bills and to help ourselves save money. Now I just want to scream run and hide. My other brides maids are also like mia have the time. I know that the wedding isnt all they think about or should think about but I feel like any time I talk to them they dont seem to even care... thanks for listening!!

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Re: I need to VENT

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    klibertikliberti member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I understand money is an issue. I'm a budget bride as well.  Think of it this way- at least it's your roomate/MOH trying to call the shots instead of a parents or someone whose  paying because then you would be more likely forced to accept the suggestions.


    Talk to her- tell her your "vision" then listen to her suggestions... you said yourself she is right sometimes about budget things but if your not interested in a suggestion then don't think about it right now.  Give it some time and re-evaluate it in the future. 

    I see your new to TK.com- use the Knotties on here for advise/ venting/ suggestions- what's what we are here for!

    I hope you feel better.  Let us know how things go but for now- take a deep breath and relax...
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    feinicstinefeinicstine member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011

    My MOH is kind of the same, but she goes in cycles.  She'll feverishly plan something for a week or so and then not talk about the wedding at all for a week.  She's also totally horrible at time management and is either early for something, or cancels on it an hour ahead of time.  She happens to be my twin sister, so I know all this about her and am fine with it.  I'm just making sure that anything she needs to do is something that can get done months in advance or right before.  For example, she'd volunteered to decorate the bathrooms at the reception site with baskets and put together the welcome kits for the Out of Towners.

    My other two bridesmaids each live at least two states away, so I just send email updates and make sure they're ordering things when they need to.  I guess I'm doing a lot of this myself and with my mother.  I get nervous when people try to take things over because I don't expect them to think about me all the time, and I know how life gets in the way.  Since this is my wedding, I don't mind doing most if not all of the work.  After all, they're going to have plenty to do when the time gets closer and they have to hold me up at the altar!


    I guess the best bet is to try to do most of the planning when she's not around.  It's got to be a lot harder since you live together, but it sounds like if she can overhear it, then she's going to get involved with it.  I guess it's nice she wants to be a part of things, but maybe tell her she needs to back down a little?  I told mine she was going to give me an anxiety attack if she kept acting how she was, and she got the hint!

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