Thank you cards from wedding

riverstarr · May 2011

Hello Everyone! I just got married on the weekend and am leaving for my honeymoon tomorrow!

Just a quick question, who should I send thank you cards to? Just the people that gave us wedding gifts/cards, or to everyone that attended the wedding? I do not want to seem rude by not sending a card to them too, what does etiquette call for? Thank you!

SirJuliusVonHaast · May 2011

Hi-- the font you are using is almost un-readably small.

Some people send thank you notes to everyone who attends, but you don't have to. Some people think that sending a thank you note for attending may make people feel like you are fishing for a gift.

caseyandlizzie · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_thank-cards-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:34Discussion:7e31400a-13a0-4efd-977e-2a3db6fea44bPost:ecb0c9bc-0eda-467c-be2f-8d9a6687f64f">Thank you cards from wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]Hello Everyone! I just got married on the weekend and am leaving for my honeymoon tomorrow! Just a quick question, who should I send thank you cards to? Just the people that gave us wedding gifts/cards, or to everyone that attended the wedding? I do not want to seem rude by not sending a card to them too, what does etiquette call for? Thank you!
Posted by riverstarr[/QUOTE]

We sent thank you cards to everyone who came to the wedding and to everyone we got a gift/card from.

ETA: Your guests took time out of their day and came to your wedding, some may travel far and not give a gift because of travel cost. I don't see how that could seem like you're fishing for a gift if you are thanking them for being there.

jessicabessica · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_thank-cards-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:7e31400a-13a0-4efd-977e-2a3db6fea44bPost:dd7d1c0c-71f1-4f30-83f7-86adabfd2522">Re: Thank you cards from wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Thank you cards from wedding : We sent thank you cards to everyone who came to the wedding and to everyone we got a gift/card from. ETA: Your guests took time out of their day and came to your wedding, some may travel far and not give a gift because of travel cost. <strong> I don't see how that could seem like you're fishing for a gift if you are thanking them for being there.</strong>
Posted by caseyandlizzie[/QUOTE]

I agree with you 100% that you (i.e. general you) should be grateful to the friends and family that attended your wedding, gift or no gift. However, there are definitely some people that would take it as a reminder that they did not send you a gift yet, and I think it really depends on the person and how you word the note.

hlq2011 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_thank-cards-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:7e31400a-13a0-4efd-977e-2a3db6fea44bPost:5ff4b7c3-87cd-4ceb-b9c0-04bdb383457a">Re: Thank you cards from wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thank you cards from wedding : I agree with you 100% that you (i.e. general you) should be grateful to the friends and family that attended your wedding, gift or no gift. However, there are definitely some people that would take it as a reminder that they did not send you a gift yet, and I think it really depends on the person and how you word the note.
Posted by jessicabessica[/QUOTE]

This.

Not to mention, the reception really is, by etiquette standards, the thank-you for attending the event.

jagore08 · May 2011

We also sent a thank you card to everyone who attended the wedding, gift or not.

noodle_oo · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_thank-cards-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:7e31400a-13a0-4efd-977e-2a3db6fea44bPost:5ff4b7c3-87cd-4ceb-b9c0-04bdb383457a">Re: Thank you cards from wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thank you cards from wedding : I agree with you 100% that you (i.e. general you) should be grateful to the friends and family that attended your wedding, gift or no gift. <strong>However, there are definitely some people that would take it as a reminder that they did not send you a gift yet, </strong>and I think it really depends on the person and how you word the note.
Posted by jessicabessica[/QUOTE]

I agree with this. We only sent thank you's to people who sent gifts because that is what the thank you notes are for. I feel like it would be awkward to word a "thank you for coming" note and I just worried people would think it was just a gift grab.

aegrish · May 2011

I send thank you notes for everything in life. literally. I will be sending ones to all our guests, gift or not. They took the time out of their day and life to attend our wedding, It's the least we could do. If they see it as a reminder that they didn't bring or send a gift, that's just silly and not something we can prevent or intended.

Karen's MOH · May 2011

We only sent them to people who gave a gift. I sort of wish we sent them to everyone but now (um... 7 months later) it would be weird and seem really gift grabby.

But also, some of the people who never gave us a gift are people whose weddings we went to really recently or are going to this summer, so I sort of feel like they just forgot and the TY would have been a little reminder... which brings me back to the original reason I didn't send them.

sjersey86 · May 2011

We're planning on sending them to everyone who attends.

Patineuse1124 · May 2011

We sent thank you cards to anybody that gave us a present whether they attended the wedding or not. We had 2 people that came to wedding but only gave us a card and we sent them a TY thanking them for the thoughtful card (they wrote nice messages in it) and for coming to wedding. We only had 2 couples that came to wedding that we didn't receive a present or card from. At first we were super nervous that they may have gotten lost especially seeing that one was the owner of DH's company and are very well off. We held off on sending them both a TY since 1) the reception is a TY for attending and 2) wedding etiquette says that people have up to a year after the wedding to give you a present. I'm glad we waited because a couple months later at the work holiday party (which was at our wedding venue), DH's boss told him that him and his wife were still trying to decide what to get us for a wedding present, stating the one year etiquette rule I already was aware of. FTR we got married in October and we still haven't gotten a present from them yet, though I'm guessing they are waiting till we close and move into our house. I know they really like DH and me, so I'm anxious to see what they get us after putting so much thought into it.

Thank you cards from wedding

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