Junior Bride's Maid

stephntom · January 2010

Does the Jr. Bride's Maid sit at the head table? What do you think?

banana468 · January 2010

If you're having a table where you're sitting with your bridal party, include the junior bridesmaid as well.

Also be sure to include the significant others or dates of any bridal party members as well.

bablingbrooke · January 2010

Why shouldn't she sit at the head table?

MyNameIsNot · January 2010

I will never understand calling someone junior anything. If she can walk up and down the aisle in a dress, hold the bouquet and smile for pictures, she's doing everything the rest of the BMs are doing. What's the point of giving her a condescending title?\

Yes, she is a BM and she should be seated as the rest of them are.

trix1223 · January 2010

ditto PPs. Of course she sits where the other BMs are sitting. And I also second the notion that she's not a "Jr." anything. It seems to me that she'll be doing what the other members of your WP are doing: walking down the aisle, standing respectfully during the ceremony, smiling for the pictures. Why then, does she have a different title?

burnsbaby · January 2010

Well my junior bridesmaids are 7 and 8 because they are the sisters of the flower girl and the ringbear, who will be 4 and 2. My junior bridesmaids are helping walk their younger sibling down the isle. Also, I have 5 bridesmaids and 5 groomsmen, so having 7 and 5 would look off.

Angelicteardrops · January 2010

I have always been told that the jr bridesmaid were considered "jr" because they are a lot younger than the other bm. My "jr" bridesmaid is going to be 11 and I made her a bm because her younger sister will be my flower girl. I don't consider it condensending at all.

bablingbrooke · January 2010

Jr BM is something created by the wedding industry to give brides another role to fill (and more $ to spend). My FG and RB were def. "JR" BM/GM age but we asked them to be FG and RB instead and they LOVED it.

Also, making decisions based on symmetry is never a good idea. You won't notice or care about the numbers. And any FG or RB who has to be helped down the aisle is probably too young.

erinlyn16 · January 2010

I agree I don't feel it is condescending. My jr. bridesmaid is my 8 year old niece and I want her to be a part of my wedding. She is too young to participate in all wedding events and is not capable of helping out to the extent my other bridesmaids will be. She is also, I feel, too old to be a flower girl. Anyways to answer your original question…I am going to be sitting her with her mother (not part of the wedding - she and my brother never married and are no longer together so it works out). If her parents are part of your wedding party I would likely seat her with them.

Danes983 · January 2010

My Jr. Will sit with her family. She is going to be 11 at the time of the wedding. I dont think she would feel comfortable sitting at the head table with a group of couples she doesnt really know too well.

denicerburbach · January 2010

Sit her at the head table. It's a great way to help her feel like a grown up. Treat her with respect and she'll act like a mature woman. The fact that you chose a Jr. Bridesmaid makes it sound as though you like to mix things up and go with the flow. Have fun. Enjoy the day. Don't stress over this.

Anthriel22 · January 2010

I havent decided where to sit my Jr. Bridesmaids yet....though I am leaning towards having them sit with their families. One Jr's little sister is a flower girl, and I think if one gets to sit at the head table, and one doesnt, there may be jealousy issues, and the flower girl is defintitely too young to be up there. I think that either way is fine. Whatever makes you the most comfortable. I am also not having the dates of the bridal party at the head table. I was a MOH and my Fiance sat at the table with all the "dates", and they had a blast, so in my opinon, dates at head table arent neccessary either!

I totally disagree with the idea that using the title Jr is demeaning? How is it demeaning? It just points out that she is probably a good 15 years younger than the other BMs, and a little too old to be a FG. My Jrs are thrilled to get to wear the "big girl" dresses and be Jrs. Also, they DONT do everything the BM's do. They have no part in planning the shower or the bachelorette or anything like that. Their only duties are on the day of the wedding. Not saying they are any less, just pointing out that usually they dont do as much.

And also to the point someone made about it being a reason to fill another role and spend more money...i dont agree there either. I think its to find a place for a girl out of the typical age ranges of the other two positions. You dont HAVE to have a Jr, or a FG for that matter. Really you just do what you want. Anyways, to answer the original question, I think it can go either way, but a lot of times little kids are more comfortable eating with their parents anyways....at least mine are! Good luck making your decision!

Gogalina · January 2010

I'm having 6 BMs & 7 GMs, a ring bearer & a flower girl. In addition, I have 3 Jr. BMs who are walking down the aisle, but not standing up during the ceremony (they'll take their seats after walking the aisle). Their role is to pin each guest with a corsage as they enter the cocktail hour & reception (cultural tradition). I'm not having the Jr. BMs as BMs because they're ages 14 & 15 & we don't have GMs that age to stand up with them. Our bridal party is in their mid to early 30s so I thought it would be inappropriate to put such young girls with such older men (I didn't think their dads would appreciate that). I'm not having the Jr. BMs sit at the head table either because I already have 23 people sitting at it & we don't have enough room. The Jr. BMs will sit with their parents at the closest round tables just like the ring bearer & flower girl. Basically, I wanted to include these girls in my wedding somehow, but their age played a role in making them Jr. BMs.

siorsolas · January 2010

Why don't you ask them where they want to sit?

siorsolas · January 2010

Why don't you ask them where they want to sit?

sararv03 · January 2010

I would say it depends on how old she is. If she is old enough and would feel comfortable sitting at the table with the rest of the party, why not. However if she is on the yonger side and would rather sit at the table with ppl she knows/her family than I would say thats a better fit.

hall1me · January 2010

I'm not sure why being called a Junior Bridesmaid is such a bad thing? They are not adults and should not be expected to fullfill the same roles as the rest of the adults. I'm not asking mine to go to the bachelorette party or stay up late making invitations because it's not appropriate. As for where to sit them, I would say it depends on their age and how much room you have, or what their parents want.

preciosa4 · January 2010

I second the idea that it depends on her age, and I also like the idea that if she is at an "in-between age" that you ask her what she prefers. An 8 year old may be good with mom and dad, but a 14 year old is probably best at the head table. For an 11-12 year old...ask!

stephntom · January 2010

Thanks for all the good insight! I'm just now considering whether I want to make me FI's sister a Jr. BM or not because she is only going to be 13. I never really liked the idea of having a Jr. BM before, but I can't really leave her out since her brother and sister will both be in the wedding party (they are a bit older). I have never been to a wedding with a Jr. BM before so I didn't know what her job would be or anything.

I don't think being called Junior is condescending. She likes the title, and she will be happy to be included. I don't want to call her a BM because she will think that she has to do the same things as the other BMs (plan the shower and such) and I really don't want her to think that she is in charge of that (because she already thought she was going to be in charge of planning the decorations for the reception...needless to say I had to put my foot down on that one.) Also, I don't have anyone her age to have her walk down the aisle with. The youngest GM will be 22, and I don't think that is appropriate. That is why she is being called "Jr."

I'll ask her where she wants to be placed. I don't want her to be upset about where I put her.

ag2037 · January 2010

i think it depends on how old she is. i know when i was 7 or 8 i would much rather have sat with my mom than a bunch of random strange grownups. conversely, when i was 12 or 13 i would have been only too happy to do so.

boydjess · January 2010

My MOH is my 13 year old daughter. My Jr. BM is my 4 year old niece. I wanted my niece to be my flower girl, but when I came home from a floral consult I gave her the bouquet they made for me and I gave it to her. She loved it and said she, "I don't want to do the flower petals, I want to carry the bouquet." She even said "Look how nice I can walk.", and took the bouquet and walked slowly down the hall way in my house. Then she turned around and said, "See Auntie Jessica I can do it!" It was just too cute. She will walk down the aisle, but sit with her parents for the ceremony and at the reception.

banana468 · January 2010

I think the "Jr." can really depend on her age. At 13, she may be fine with it or she might just "say" she's fine with it.

To PPs who aren't seating their WP with their SOs/dates, please reconsider. This is not a cordial practice.

rodeo417 · January 2010

My Jr. Bride's maid is sitting at the head table with her parents but she does have the option to sit with her grandmom who will be at the wedding. She is 10 years old and just to make her feel "more special" i am making her a bracelet with a charm to remind her of her black cat on it...

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