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Uninvite question!

thale0924thale0924 member
100 Comments
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I sent out my save the dates months ago.  Since then I transferred with my job.  Before I left I was really close with a coworker.  Right around the time I was transferring he really let me down with a project he agreed to help with and was SUPER rude.  We haven't talked since. 

I am about to send out my invitations and I really do not want to invite him to our wedding, but because he got a save the date does that mean I'm obligated to invite him?  I honestly do not believe I will ever see/talk to him again. 

Thanks for the help!
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Re: Uninvite question!

  • pokepoke27pokepoke27 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Generally STD = Invitation. However, if you are terminating the relationship between yourself and the CW then I would say it's fine to not send the invitation.

    I had invited a friend of my parent's that I often hung out wiht at social events as well. Long story short, they moved and she went BSC. Sent angry messages to everone on FB and told everyone she wanted nothing to do with us because she wanted to start over. So she didn't get an invitation, because this happened between the time that the STDs and the Invitations went out. 



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  • MyUserName1MyUserName1 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    Technically yes.  That being said, do you work in a field where you might work with him again or come across him again?  You clearly do not care about any friendship with this person, but if it could affect your career negatively to slight him, I'd invite him.  Otherwise, I wouldn't.
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  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I agree with Muni. If he runs in the same professional circles as you and you might run into him in some work-related way in the future, I'd do the invitation, and most likely if things ended badly, he wouldn't come anyhow.

    If you aren't worried about professional repercussions, I think this is one time it's OK to not send an invitation after an STD went out.


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  • twotimemobtwotimemob member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its
    Hell no.  I equate sending out STD's with asking your bridal party too early...a lot can change and then you're stuck.  Without STD's, your guest list is flexible until the day you send out the invitations.
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  • pokepoke27pokepoke27 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_uninvite-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e383179f-846d-4d89-b00c-1f7310b9d3c2Post:4fc5247c-6615-434d-abe4-db50bd9546ba">Re: Uninvite question!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hell no.  I equate sending out STD's with asking your bridal party too early...a lot can change and then you're stuck.  Without STD's, your guest list is flexible until the day you send out the invitations.
    Posted by twotimemob[/QUOTE]

    <div>Okay, thanks. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" /></div>

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  • buttaflaibuttaflai
    1000 Comments
    If things went sour, he probably wouldn't go anyway.
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  • SnippylynnSnippylynn member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Hi Buttafli, WTF is up with your sig quote?

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    Wedding stuff.
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  • boomboom1243boomboom1243 member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    you can uninvite people its your wedding! we actually uninvited someone and they are not in the wedding party anymore. basically things happen and thats not your fault but me and my fiancee talked and we wouldnt want him there the day of our wedding cuz he was a very negative person with a bunch of events that have happend that its just not worth it. we still talk to him but only for work things because we work at the same company but we have made it clear we do not want him in our personal lives.
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  • MrsHoward2BeMrsHoward2Be member
    100 Comments 5 Love Its
    If your not talking there probably not expected to be invited. Don't send an invite. Life goes on.
    http://melissadebro.blogspot.com/?m=0
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  • thale0924thale0924 member
    100 Comments
    Thanks every one!!

    I find it EXTREMELY unlikely that we will end up in the same professional circles again, and I doubt that he will ever be in the position to make my professional life difficult.  However, I do think that if he got an invite he would come. ...Just that kind of person!  

    Thanks for putting my conscience at ease. :)
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    100 Comments
    I wouldn't invite him regardless if he got a STD. He sounds like an @ss. 
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