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Pre-wedding Parties
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Isn't it MY party?

ashleykimballashleykimball
First Comment
in Pre-wedding Parties
So, my wedding is in November. My fiance and I both work for the same company and have a LOT of friends that work with us. I asked one of my closest friends to be a witness for our tiny ceremony and she also took on the role as maid of honor. We'll call this friend Melissa. Melissa also volunteered to plan my bachelorette party. In the mean time, my friends have been asking what's going on with the party, when it is, etc. I asked another friend close to Melissa and I if she could find out what was up. I was then informed that certain people aren't liked by Melissa and my other friend, so they can throw their own party for me. 

I would have liked my sister, my mom, and ALL of my friends at one event, but I just don't see that happening. It's important to me. I think people should put aside their differences for this ONE night.

And now thinking about it, Melissa and the other friend like to drink a lot and I don't drink as much....WTF I think I'd end up DDing my own bachelorette party. 

Please someone tell me I'm not crazy for being upset about all this.
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Re: Isn't it MY party?

  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Just decline her offer of a bach party.  Hopefully someone else might step up to the plate and offer to plan one for you and won't play the junior high clique bull crap games.
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  • ashleykimballashleykimball
    First Comment
    'Melissa' has already bought the decorations and stuff. I guess I'm okay with having multiples, I just hoped that since these ladies work together with the exception of my mom and sister, they could be civil for once.
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Well, if she has bought things you are kind of stuck then.  Just smile through it and accept it for what it is.

    I'm sorry she has to play bully games about who she does and doesn't like, but go and have a good time.

    You could plan a girl's night (not another bach party) for your mom, sister, and others who weren't invited.  Your friend has put you in an awkward position.  Who wants to tell their sister they can't come to the bach party?

    I hope it all works out well for you.  Good luck.
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  • ashleykimballashleykimball
    First Comment
    Thanks. I'm putting myself in charge of my bridal shower and afterward, my family and other friends will go out.
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  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited August 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_isnt-it-my-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:c6423983-a3b6-4d6a-854c-b44a2e5f7226Post:fa3b41e0-bc6a-44ae-b093-b91a50a1533d">Re: Isn't it MY party?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks.<strong> I'm putting myself in charge of my bridal shower </strong>and afterward, my family and other friends will go out.
    Posted by ashleykimball[/QUOTE]

    Please don't do the bolded. Showers are obviously gift-giving events and hosting that for yourself is rude and very gift-grabby. If no one offers to host a shower, you don't have to have one.

    I don't get what hosting your own shower has to do with not liking the b-party she's planning for you, anyway.


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  • HobokensFuryHobokensFury member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_isnt-it-my-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:c6423983-a3b6-4d6a-854c-b44a2e5f7226Post:fa3b41e0-bc6a-44ae-b093-b91a50a1533d">Re: Isn't it MY party?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks. I'm putting myself in charge of my bridal shower and afterward, my family and other friends will go out.
    Posted by ashleykimball[/QUOTE]

    Please don't do such a rude thing.
     
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  • ashleykimballashleykimball
    First Comment
    I'm not expecting gifts at either. By planning my bridal shower, I'd just love to have my girl friends and family around for a little lunch and sitting around drinking mimosas.
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  • ashleykimballashleykimball
    First Comment
    Thanks ladies. I think I'll be doing the girl's luncheon *good name for it* and if people aren't invited to 'Melissa's' party, I'll just have them meet me for drinks another time. 
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