Day of List

KSParker2012 · July 2012

I'm working on a list for my girls of things they need to remember to bring for the wedding. So far I have:

Dress
Shoes
Jewelry
Make up
Emergency Kit

What else do I need to remember to tell them to bring? What about the Groomsmen?

KSParker2012 · July 2012

Better safe then sorry that's my motto. Its not micro managing. It's being prepared.

JoanE2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:1c7add37-7f3e-4346-93af-293b76bad232">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]Better safe then sorry that's my motto. Its not micro managing. It's being prepared.
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

Well if you want to be really safe, why don't you just have the girls give you their dresses, shoes, jewelry and makeup and you can bring it to them the day of?

Seriously, unless they're 10, they should be able to handle their day of attire and accessories without you giving them a list. I'd be insulted if a bride gave me a list and would probably throw it out.

Summer2011Bride · July 2012

The Bms will remember to bring their dress and shoes, etc. I wouldn't be worried about it. If you want a day-of emergency type kit ideas, I can give you some of those, but that's stuff you should bring if you want it.

FWIW, my BMs all chose to dress at home so they came already wearing their dress, shoes, jewelry, etc.

ElisabethJoanne · July 2012

"I'm from the government, and I'm here to help." The Centers for Disease Control now has some recommendations:
http://blogs.cdc.gov/publichealthmatters/2012/07/cdcs_weddingday_survival_guide/

mbcdefg · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:1c7add37-7f3e-4346-93af-293b76bad232">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]Better safe then sorry that's my motto. Its not micro managing. It's being prepared.
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

So worry about yourself being prepared, then, instead of trying to control everyone else.

Really, they can handle it. I get that you want to help them, but you're going to come across as incredibly needy and bossy if you do this. It basically says, "I don't trust you to remember everything on your own so I'm giving you a checklist," whether you intend it that way or not.

And it's bad enough if you give it to the girls. Your fiance will never, EVER hear the end of it from his buddies if you start giving out lists to the men.

KSParker2012 · July 2012

K but none of you answered my original question. I didn't ask if I should make a list or not, my questions was what to include on it. How is that bossy and controlling? Its just a reminder its not like its going to say, "you are an idiot and you'll forget everything so here is a list". I stick to my original statement better safe then sorry. Thanks for the help I guess?

libby2483 · July 2012

I think that adding hair supplies like bobby pins and hairspray could be helpful, unless these are in the emergency kit. Also, deodorant is never a bad item to have along!

KSParker2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:38911b8c-b7dd-41d3-9cb1-329eb45b7784">Re:Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]I think that adding hair supplies like bobby pins and hairspray could be helpful, unless these are in the emergency kit. Also, deodorant is never a bad item to have along!
Posted by libby2483[/QUOTE]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate the feedback on what I originally posted ;)

Viczaesar · July 2012

Your bridesmaids probably won't appreciate being treated like imbeciles. Few people do, surprisingly.

GoodLuckBear14 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:0287826c-f672-4922-a2ee-f45215dfc5cc">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]K but none of you answered my original question. I didn't ask if I should make a list or not, my questions was what to include on it. How is that bossy and controlling? Its just a reminder its not like its going to say, "you are an idiot and you'll forget everything so here is a list". I stick to my original statement better safe then sorry. Thanks for the help I guess?
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

Except that by giving them a list like this you are telling them that you think they are idiots who are lucky they can tie shoelaces together. If you think there are emergency things that will be needed, that is on you to provide them, not the BMs. I can tell you right now that if anyone handed me a list like that, I'd drop it on the floor in front of them and walk away.

JoanE2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:0287826c-f672-4922-a2ee-f45215dfc5cc">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]K but none of you answered my original question. I didn't ask if I should make a list or not, <strong>my questions was what to include on it.</strong> How is that bossy and controlling? Its just a reminder its not like its going to say, "you are an idiot and you'll forget everything so here is a list". I stick to my original statement better safe then sorry. Thanks for the help I guess?
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

Your list for your BM should have nothing. Giving them a list for basic things that any adult can handle is controlling. Do you seriously think they are going to forget to bring their dress?? Stop being a bridezilla.

sadieboud10 · July 2012

Your girls and guys will know what they need to get ready. They do do it on an everyday basis so they better than you know what they'll need. I received a day of emergency kit and it was quite helpful so you may want to look into doing one like that to share among you and your girls.

Lizzieyounce · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:9bdecd44-4b7d-4ae2-a7bf-ea60790b335a">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]"I'm from the government, and I'm here to help." The Centers for Disease Control now has some recommendations: <a href="http://blogs.cdc.gov/publichealthmatters/2012/07/cdcs_weddingday_survival_guide/" rel="nofollow">http://blogs.cdc.gov/publichealthmatters/2012/07/cdcs_weddingday_survival_guide/</a>
Posted by ElisabethJoanne[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>LOL...that's good.

</div>

matt&brit · July 2012

You guys are so rude! I just got married a month ago and I sent my girls a list of stuff not to forget and they all said thank you cause they would of forgotten something. You don't know her situation. Some or most live out of town and I know when I'm packing to go out of town I tend to forget things if I don't have a list. The bride is making it easier on her girls not controlling them. If one of my bridesmaids threw away my list I would think they are just immature! So maybe think about the reasons she is asking the questions. She has a reason to ask and she doesn't need people telling her she is wrong!

KSParker2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:37bf1e56-5bdd-47c3-b3e2-54ec04693fbd">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Day of List : Your list for your BM should have nothing. Giving them a list for basic things that any adult can handle is controlling. Do you seriously think they are going to forget to bring their dress?? Stop being a bridezilla.
Posted by JoanE2012[/QUOTE]

A bridezilla are you kidding me? I don't understand why people on this board can't simply say you don't need a list instead of calling me a bridezilla, stupid etc. That is not necessary. Did I say I was calling my girls incompetent? No. Everyone is coming in from out of town. Better safe than sorry. But you win. I won't give them a list. Couldn't you simply have said that instead of insulting me and my friends? And I will not erase my original post. I watch this board I know when you start attacking girls they delete their post cause you made them feel stupid which I won't. I don't feel stupid. It was a legitimate question that I hoped people would be mature, and descent enough to answer. Obviously I was wrong. All you had to say was "You are stressing out way too much, they won't forget anything they are your friends and smart girls, you really don't need a list" Not "You are controlling, micro managing and the like". I will never post on this board again because every time I do I get insulted. And go ahead and reply to this post to show me how superior your are and call me an idiot, bridezilla, etc. because I will not be looking at this thread anymore. Have a great time ladies you've been SO helpful. *Rolls eyes.

Ali092011 · July 2012

If you have a BM who is likely to forget her bridesmaids dress on the day of your wedding, do you really think a list is going to prevent that?

KSParker2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:88bcb51f-f87b-43d9-b304-2574d5cf62d3">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]If you have a BM who is likely to forget her bridesmaids dress on the day of your wedding , do you really think a list is going to prevent that?
Posted by Ali092011[/QUOTE]

Its just in case! They are from out of town what is SO hard to understand about that?

GoodLuckBear14 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:c207e513-b2b0-4ee1-9260-bd3690f54492">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Day of List : Its just in case! They are from out of town what is SO hard to understand about that?
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

I was in a wedding in Ireland and still did not need the Bride or Groom to tell me what to bring or to remind me to bring my dress. We are trying to get you to see just how insulting your plan is.

JoanE2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:de1bc320-566a-4470-a328-8d5009ab51da">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Day of List : A bridezilla are you kidding me? I don't understand why people on this board can't simply say you don't need a list instead of calling me a bridezilla, stupid etc. That is not necessary. Did I say I was calling my girls incompetent? No. Everyone is coming in from out of town. Better safe than sorry. But you win. <strong>I won't give them a list.</strong> <strong>Couldn't you simply have said that instead of insulting me and my friends?</strong> And I will not erase my original post. I watch this board I know when you start attacking girls they delete their post cause you made them feel stupid which I won't. I don't feel stupid. It was a legitimate question that I hoped people would be mature, and descent enough to answer. Obviously I was wrong. All you had to say was "You are stressing out way too much, they won't forget anything they are your friends and smart girls, you really don't need a list" Not "You are controlling, micro managing and the like". I will never post on this board again because every time I do I get insulted. And go ahead and reply to this post to show me how superior your are and call me an idiot, bridezilla, etc. because I will not be looking at this thread anymore. Have a great time ladies you've been SO helpful. *Rolls eyes.
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

We DID tell you that. But you came back again and said, and I quote, "K but none of you answered my original question. I didn't ask if I should make a list or not, my questions was what to include on it. "

And I agree you shouldn't erase your posts....I always hate when people do that because it usually means I missed out on some mindless entertainment!

matt&brit · July 2012

She not over reacting, it's a month before her wedding and she needs some last minute advice and y'all just want to give her crap and tell her she is wrong. All you need to say is I don't think a list is a good idea but if you want to make one here are some ideas! How old is everyone because you are acting like your 15? It's just a list who cares. She knows her friends so let her do what she wants!

JoanE2012 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:e67928d4-cf1c-41a9-b426-577305f4086f">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]She not over reacting, it's a month before her wedding and she needs some last minute advice and y'all just want to give her crap and tell her she is wrong. All you need to say is I don't think a list is a good idea but if you want to make one here are some ideas! How old is everyone because you are acting like your 15? It's just a list who cares. She knows her friends so let her do what she wants!
Posted by matt&brit[/QUOTE

You guys must be BFFs! I think what you fail to realize is that we told her a list was not a good idea. We're not going to tell her what to put on a list if we think it's wrong.

No one's acting like they are 15, though the OP seems to be treating her BMs as if they are by wanting to give them lists.

OBX2011 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:de1bc320-566a-4470-a328-8d5009ab51da">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Day of List : A bridezilla are you kidding me? I don't understand why people on this board can't simply say you don't need a list instead of calling me a bridezilla, stupid etc. That is not necessary. Did I say I was calling my girls incompetent? No. Everyone is coming in from out of town. Better safe than sorry. But you win. I won't give them a list. Couldn't you simply have said that instead of insulting me and my friends? And I will not erase my original post. I watch this board I know when you start attacking girls they delete their post cause you made them feel stupid which I won't. I don't feel stupid. It was a legitimate question that I hoped people would be mature, and descent enough to answer. Obviously I was wrong. All you had to say was "You are stressing out way too much, they won't forget anything they are your friends and smart girls, you really don't need a list" Not "You are controlling, micro managing and the like". I will never post on this board again because every time I do I get insulted. And go ahead and reply to this post to show me how superior your are and call me an idiot, bridezilla, etc. because I will not be looking at this thread anymore. Have a great time ladies you've been SO helpful. *Rolls eyes.
Posted by KSParker2012[/QUOTE]

Ummm....the very first post said that! Reading fail, party of 1 please. And several posters DID tell you that you didn't need the list and that your girls could take care of themselves, but that wasn't enough for you.

OBX2011 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:e67928d4-cf1c-41a9-b426-577305f4086f">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]She not over reacting, it's a month before her wedding and she needs some last minute advice and y'all just want to give her crap and tell her she is wrong. <strong>All you need to say is I don't think a list is a good idea</strong> but if you want to make one here are some ideas! How old is everyone because you are acting like your 15? It's just a list who cares. She knows her friends so let her do what she wants!
Posted by matt&brit[/QUOTE]

Make that, reading fail party of 2 please ;)

GoodLuckBear14 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_day-of-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e4944c86-b529-467e-84f3-1b5a95ef30bcPost:e67928d4-cf1c-41a9-b426-577305f4086f">Re: Day of List</a>:
[QUOTE]She not over reacting, it's a month before her wedding and she needs some last minute advice and y'all just want to give her crap and tell her she is wrong. All you need to say is I don't think a list is a good idea but if you want to make one here are some ideas! How old is everyone because you are acting like your 15? It's just a list who cares. She knows her friends so let her do what she wants!
Posted by matt&brit[/QUOTE]

Why in the world would we ever give advice on how to execute a horribly bad idea?

aerinpegadrak · July 2012

Do you really think they're going to show up naked? Have you ever needed to be reminded to bring your clothes for a party?

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