Rehearsal Dinner- Bridal party and parents only?

Re: Rehearsal Dinner- Bridal party and parents only?

• csh96 member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  That's what we are doing.  Parents, siblings, bridal party and their guests and parents of the ring bearer.  We considered grand parents but we only have 2 and they are traveling from out of town and figured it would be too much for them anyway.

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• MissOwl

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  you should invite the sig others of your bp. sorry about your friend's husband, but no matter how small the gathering, if it is co-ed (aka not a girls' night), partners must be invited.
  the others can be left out though.
  

  Linky link to MissOwl's Pinterest

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  I think its fine to invite only your WP and parents. But don't forget anyone else who is involved in the wedding such as readers or someone who may be singing.
  
  Our RD was about $1k and we had our WP, parents, a few family friends and their spouse & kids, our priest, deacon & his wife. And we only had a heavy hor'dourve/appetizer dinner with white and red wine provided. We were just so thankful that my IL's organized, hosted and paid for everything.
  

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• KellyRVT member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  Just a curious question: Why are significant others required if they aren't in the rehearsal? Are they supposed to come to the rehearsal too, or just the restaurant?

  
  

  We have 12 members in our wedding party, ourselves, my parents, his mom, step dad, his dad and stepfather and his younger brother and sister. Each bridal party member would be expected to bring their significant other then, which would be another 12 people. 

  
  

  Honestly, unless we do Papa John's we just won't be able to afford it. We could cover the food but not the alcohol, and I think it's considered tacky to ask guests to pay for their alcoholic drinks (is it?). If we didn't just get slapped with an unexpected $3500 emergency vet bill this wouldn't be an issue. But now our honeymoon is in serious jeopardy and if I can save that by cutting out people at the rehearsal dinner it would be worth it to me. In a perfect world we would invite everyone, but I really am heartbroken we are going to miss out on our dream honeymoon.

  
  

  Thoughts? 

  

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• nnoble4

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  We are doing BP and their significant others, and parents. We will also be inviting a few of the OOT aunts and uncles if they will already be in town. We are doing it on Thursday night instead of Friday night.  We are hoping to go to the Clippers game with people on Friday night.
  
  If we invited all OOT guests, it would be another reception, since my whole family would be considered OOT. So we are trying to limit that.
  

  

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_ohio-columbus_rehearsal-dinner-bridal-party-parents-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:112Discussion:5e5cc196-9d8f-47f6-a88d-1a0bdaa36b00Post:38f595d0-0078-4523-95d3-81a403705f3d">Re: Rehearsal Dinner- Bridal party and parents only?</a>:
  [QUOTE]Just a curious question: Why are significant others required if they aren't in the rehearsal? Are they supposed to come to the rehearsal too, or just the restaurant?<strong> They are not required to attend, but it is a nice gesture. You are seperating a social unit. They don't have to attend the actual rehearsal, unless they want to, but it is nice if you invite them to dinner or whatever.</strong> We have 12 members in our wedding party, ourselves, my parents, his mom, step dad, his dad and stepfather and his younger brother and sister. Each bridal party member would be expected to bring their significant other then, which would be another 12 people.  Honestly, unless we do Papa John's we just won't be able to afford it. We could cover the food but not the alcohol, and I think it's considered tacky to ask guests to pay for their alcoholic drinks (is it?). <strong>You don't have to provide alcohol for the RD if you don't want to. But again, it is nice if you can. Even if you just do wine and beer. </strong>If we didn't just get slapped with an unexpected $3500 emergency vet bill this wouldn't be an issue. But now our honeymoon is in serious jeopardy and if I can save that by cutting out people at the rehearsal dinner it would be worth it to me. In a perfect world we would invite everyone, but I really am heartbroken we are going to miss out on our dream honeymoon. Thoughts?  <strong>I totally understand emergencies. Life happens. Why not just do a backyard BBQ rehearsal dinner or something? Cheap, simple, easy and relaxing. That is perfectly okay.</strong>
  
  Posted by KellyRVT[/QUOTE]

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• buckeyesweetz

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  We aren't having alcohol at our RD. We are having a full open bar at the actual wedding, and really wanted to keep the RD within budget. Not having alcohol would help a lot! Have you already picked a location? We are using Buca di beppo. The meal we picked was 24/person but that did include the non alcoholic beverages.

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• KellyRVT member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  MissySue, I love the idea of a backyard style rehearsal dinner! It's much more casual than the theme to our wedding but at this point, compromises need to be made. Thank you for the suggestion!  What I also love about this is that we could invite everyone that is coming from out of town. What I don't like is the fact that I would have to clean my house, finish the deck and landscaping this summer, and we also have no grass currently. Ah, the joys of homeownership! lol

  
  

  @buckeye- We actually just got pricing from Bucca last week, and it is definitely a contender. Even at $24/pp that works out to be $816 before tax and gratuity. 

  
  

  At this point, it might be cheaper to look into catering at my own house! lol. 

  

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  Kelly - you are definitely welcome. A RD doesn't have to be a fancy, formal affair. I am sure your house is fine to host a RD Or what about your parents or a friends house? And definitely check into catering if you decide to do it at home. I know places like Hoggy's and City BBQ cater. Just suggestions, I don't know what kind of food you are interested in.

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• kiyamurph

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  We're also having wedding party and their significant others and parents.  We're not doing out of town guests because it would cost way way too much.  

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• KellyRVT member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  I'm vegan and my fiance' is vegetairan, not sure Hoggy's or City BBQ would work out, lol. But thanks for the ideas! We have recommendations from some of our veg friends on other caterers, like Del from Wellness Forum (one of the top vegan chefs). 

  
  

  Our families are all out of town, we are both originally from the Cleveland area but wanted to have our wedding here in Columbus. 

  

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  I gotcha. That's okay.
  
  I hope you guys figure out something that fits in your budget. Good luck.
  

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• csh96 member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  we're going with Schmidt's and it's less than $20 per person including tax and gratuity but before any bar charges.

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• KellyRVT member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  Do you have information on Schmidt's? I haven't heard of it before. Thank you! 

  

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• EmDizzle

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  I don't think csh96 saw that you are vegan... schmidts is a german sausage haus- probably not your cup of tea

  
  

  My Brother and sister in law had their RD at her parents house, they rented a big tent for weather concerns, but it ended up being a beautiful evening.  It was a simple BBQ, they actually had a good musician friend come over and he played and sang after dinner - honestly one of the most enjoyable RD I've ever been to. It was just so relaxed and fun. 

  
  

  As for who you invite - I'm usually in the boat of married or engaged spouses should be invited. however, you're not going to burn any bridges if you don't.  My friend was a little grumbled that her fiance wasn't invited to a RD for a wedding she was in, but it wasn't the end of the world, and she doesn't hold it against her friend at all.  It can be a little inconvient for the couple, but they'll get over it very quickly.  And like you said, if you try to do your best to keep the RD short, simple and sweet, it will be less time-consuming and you're bridal party can go back to their spouses saying "you didn't miss much".  Do what you got to do to keep your checkbook balanced
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• CLECyclist member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  We're having the BP, parents, OOT guests and SOs at the rehearsal dinner. It will be at FI's aunt's house and we're hiring a taco truck. Super casual and relaxing, and cheap!!

  
  
  TTC since October 2011.
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• csh96 member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_ohio-columbus_rehearsal-dinner-bridal-party-parents-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:112Discussion:5e5cc196-9d8f-47f6-a88d-1a0bdaa36b00Post:a6b1cc4b-8c72-4fe4-88dc-a1f14e3bcf6a">Re: Rehearsal Dinner- Bridal party and parents only?</a>:
  [QUOTE]I don't think csh96 saw that you are vegan... schmidts is a german sausage haus- probably not your cup of tea Posted by EmDizzle[/QUOTE]
  
  Opps, missed that part.  That probably won't work then! :)

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• a-ingram member

  

  April 2011 edited December 2011

  As far as significant others go, you should invite them as well.  Especially if any of your wedding party is out of town, and their SO will be traveling with them.  Your WP has probably spent a lot of money on your wedding, the least you could do is invite the SO to dinner.
  
  I'm sorry about your unfortunate circumstances with your dog, but there is no need to have a fancy rehersal dinner.  We are having Hoggy's at my future in-laws home.  I'm sure there has to be something affordable for your rehersal dinner...where do you like to eat when you go out or is there anything you can preorder from a grocery store or GFS?

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