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I think XH is trying to mess with me

prodigalgirlprodigalgirl member
First Comment
in Second Weddings
I got a message on FB along with a friend request.
Quote:
If I am mistaken I am sorry.. you look ao much like Erin I dated vert briefly in EL paso past year.. I really really liked her and I hope you are her..because you do look alot alot alot like her.. I see you are happy and well.. I f this is you..I just wanted to say hello...

Tony


So, here's the deal. I lived in El Paso when I was married to XH, but nowhere on my profile does it say I ever lived in El Paso. So, I look like an Erin he dated? How did he find my profile? He couldn't have just searched for an "Erin" and stumbled upon me. Really, the only thing that makes sense is if he searched FOR ME. Here's the kicker. He's a soldier, just like XH. They probably worked together in El Paso. But I don't know him at all.

It just has me confused. My dad is convinced that XH is sick and mentally "off" enough to try something big, now that my wedding is getting closer. We've been almost bracing for it. He already tried getting me to go to court to lower the child support payments, since I'm remarrying. That didn't work. We've been waiting for his next move.

This is just weird. Is he trying to set up a situation to mess up my relationship with FI?

Does this make sense to any of you? I know I probably just seem like a paranoid XW, but XH is just THAT unpredictably sick.
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Re: I think XH is trying to mess with me

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    renjon7798renjon7798 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I have a EBoyfriend just that sick...trust me, they are out there.  delte the friend request and say you do not know this person.  Then block them.  Also, check the security settings on your account to make sure only friends can see anything about you.  you can even make it so only friends can see your profile picture, no one else.
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    iluvmy0341iluvmy0341
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm with renjon--change all your settings so no one can see anything! I had to do that to mine and my H's because as soon as we got married, all these exes of his kept crawling out of the woodworks trying to screw up our marriage. My ex made a fake profile of a girl, and started harassing me and my H via FB because our profiles allowed people to send messages when they weren't our friends. We've even gone as far as changing our cell phone numbers 3 times due to his exes...not convenient when we both have jobs that require cell phone contact with us!
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    Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Sorry to hear all of this.  So happy, once again, I am not on FB!  Have you considered just getting rid of your FB profile/account?  Good luck, whichever remedy you decide to pursue.
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    IslandBeachBrideIslandBeachBride member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I have dealings with a sicko XH - he will stop at nothing.  He loves to pose as a x h.s. boyfriend trying to get me to "meet" him for drinks.  DELETE.  Has his live in g/f send me nasty, threatening emails.   He creeps my FB page through our son as he knows the password.  There is NO getting away from this jerk. 

    I'm always on guard for the next stalking or court date.  I feel for you and the BS.  My only advice, ignore it.

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    lindaloulubbocklindaloulubbock
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Tighten up your facebook settings for awhile-be only visible to your friends.  Remove any joint friends.

    I went through this during my divorce.  I swear, Facebook was the messiest part of my divorce.
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    MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I feel your pain...  

    My XH still signs me up for same sex dating sites, and for insurance quotes for him (all using an email account I have had since 1997 that he does not have access too), he also signs me up for long distance service requests from the monopoly carriers using his last name at my current address (which I only used my maiden name at), and other idiotic crap.  He's been with his current girlfriend since November 2008 (before we were separated) and they live together now but I doubt she is aware of his crap.  There is a No Contact Order in place - so he is in violation, right now we're ignoring it but if it starts up again we're going to take everything into court and find out how they want to handle it.  (This idiot will be 65 on his next birthday - he was considerably older than me)

    He, his family and all his "friends" are blocked from my FB account and I have the account privacy set up so high it's damn near impossible to locate me.  

    We do not have children together so there is no reason for him to contact me at all. 

    And all of this is more reason to prove why he is an ex! 
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    PhoenixMamaPhoenixMama
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Delete and block... do not engage or get on that ride.  Your gut is likely right that it's your ex wanting to start something.

    I also ditto everyone on setting the privacy settings.  I've had to private lock down everything since my EX started a bunch of BS too.  I'm not a real private person and normally would care less to have a public profile... unfortunately, with twisted narcisstic ex's, one does not always have that luxury and it's better to avoid the drama.  Privacy settings are a great tool.
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