Wording and Formality

Re: Wording and Formality

• cwaggoner07 member

  

  May 2012

  Ours is pretty casual, especially since it will be so hot in Texas in July. I've been spreading by word of mouth more than anything. When my grandfather said he wanted to wear a full on suit I was like, hold up grandpa.... Dockers and a polo will be just fine.

  It was a fairytale.

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• LeiselEB member

  

  May 2012

  For the most part I agree with LTB. However, if I got an invite with the time and date written numerically, I would assume it was very casual. Maybe not jeans and a t shirt casual, but I'd probably wear a more casual skirt and top or a sundress. I'd tell my FI to wear a shirt and maybe a tie but not a jacket. That type of wording just makes me think of birthday parties, not weddings. I consider the levels of formality to be white tie, black tie, semi formal and casual. Most weddings I've been to have been semi formal or black tie. The black tie weddings had very formal traditional wording and simple, elegant styles to the invites. The semi formal still kept traditional wording but had more colorful invite styles.

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• Peavy member

  

  May 2012

  As PP said, it is more the style of the invitation than the wording that indicates the formality of the wedding.
  
  Let's shatter a myth here -- NOBODY hosts or attends a white tie wedding.  Dress code for white tie is similar to what you see for heads of state attending official dinners - men in tailcoats, which are dressier than tuxedos, with a white vest and white bow tie, and women in very fancy evening gowns.
  
  Black tie doesn't just mean "dress up, dammit."  It is a style of event as well as a dress code - tuxedos for men, formal gowns or very fancy cocktail dresses for women.  These events are ALWAYS held at night at the finest venue in town, top shelf liquor, full band - in other words, the best of everything.
  
  Formal or semi-formal evening weddings - suit and tie for the men, cocktail dresses for the women.
  Formal daytime weddings - suit and tie for men, very nice daytime dresses or suits for women.
  
  Casual - still dressed nicely, no jeans, flip flops, etc.
  
  Informal - anything else!

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• vantica

  

  May 2012 edited May 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_wording-and-formality?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:868dc4b4-ce20-4a1c-a082-64a93cf5f5edPost:fe572ad6-5999-47b3-8af9-99ca11d0ac64">Re: Wording and Formality</a>:
  [QUOTE]It's more the style of the invitation dicates the formality than the wording. So an invitation with hot pink flowers in a pink and orange envelope is less formal of a wedding than an invitation on heavy linen cardstock in all black raised ink. As for your example with the date, I would think the wedding is somewhat less formal, but it wouldn't change my attire. Then again, most people who read a wedding invitation don't think of it the same way as people who frequent these boards. As for formality, I really only categorize them into 3 different ones, black tie, white tie and other.<strong> Every wedding I've attended has fallen under "other" which means I'm wearing a cocktail dress and heels and H is in a suit or at least a button down with a tie.</strong>
  Posted by lovethebeach16[/QUOTE]
  
  See, this is the way most weddings I've been to around here are like, whether they have formal wording, or invite styles, or not.  Maybe my idea of casual and semi-formal is way off. 

  

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• vantica

  

  May 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_wording-and-formality?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:868dc4b4-ce20-4a1c-a082-64a93cf5f5edPost:3b5a65e0-62c4-4051-9534-f4cc431b7fb3">Re:Wording and Formality</a>:
  [QUOTE]For the most part I agree with LTB. However, if I got an invite with the time and date written numerically, I would assume it was very casual. Maybe not jeans and a t shirt casual, <strong>but I'd probably wear a more casual skirt and top or a sundress.</strong> I'd tell my FI to <strong>wear a shirt and maybe a tie but not a jacket.</strong> That type of wording just makes me think <strong>of birthday parties, not weddings.</strong> I consider the levels of formality to be white tie, black tie, semi formal and casual. Most weddings I've been to have been semi formal or black tie. The black tie weddings had very formal traditional wording and simple, elegant styles to the invites. The semi formal still kept traditional wording but had more colorful invite styles.
  Posted by LeiselEB[/QUOTE]
  
  I still consider this dressy, therefore not casual.  So maybe my idea of casual and semi-formal is off.  Hmmm.  Really though, I am not after full suits and formal dress, but I wouldn't want people to think it's a jeans affair either.

  

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• vantica

  

  May 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_wording-and-formality?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:868dc4b4-ce20-4a1c-a082-64a93cf5f5edPost:9cc7f0a7-847e-417e-a085-723cb83a29db">Re: Wording and Formality</a>:
  [QUOTE]As PP said, it is more the style of the invitation than the wording that indicates the formality of the wedding. Let's shatter a myth here -- NOBODY hosts or attends a white tie wedding.  Dress code for white tie is similar to what you see for heads of state attending official dinners - men in tailcoats, which are dressier than tuxedos, with a white vest and white bow tie, and women in very fancy evening gowns. Black tie doesn't just mean "dress up, dammit."  It is a style of event as well as a dress code - tuxedos for men, formal gowns or very fancy cocktail dresses for women.  These events are ALWAYS held at night at the finest venue in town, top shelf liquor, full band - in other words, the best of everything. Formal or semi-formal evening weddings - suit and tie for the men, cocktail dresses for the women. Formal daytime weddings - suit and tie for men, very nice daytime dresses or suits for women. <strong>Casual - still dressed nicely, no jeans, flip flops, etc. </strong>Informal - anything else!
  Posted by Peavy[/QUOTE]
  
  I guess what I would be after is a cross between semi-formal and casual then.  Dressy, but no need to be overdone unless the guest wants to be of course.  Interesting.  That being the case, would my wording example be appropriate? 

  

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• ElisabethJoanne member

  

  May 2012

  FWIW, I've discussed wedding invitations with several men, and they learn 0 about the formality of the event from the invitations, unless, maybe, they're e-mailed. Bunches of bachelors get no clue what they're supposed to wear even from the time of year, time of day, and venue. Though, really, I don't know how much this matters. Unless the invitation says "black tie," a man can wear a suit and tie and ditch the coat if a suit is over-dressed and even ditch the tie if shirt-and-tie is overdressed.
  
  But, IMO, it's very hard to design an invitation that will get a bachelor to "do or think differently towards the wedding."
  
  I have do other disagreements with PPs, if this is even a disagreement.
  

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• vantica

  

  May 2012

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_wording-and-formality?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:868dc4b4-ce20-4a1c-a082-64a93cf5f5edPost:82dcbcb7-b512-4b6c-87a0-9430900636a6">Re: Wording and Formality</a>:
  [QUOTE]FWIW, I've discussed wedding invitations with several men, and they learn 0 about the formality of the event from the invitations, unless, maybe, they're e-mailed. Bunches of bachelors get no clue what they're supposed to wear even from the time of year, time of day, and venue. Though, really, I don't know how much this matters. Unless the invitation says "black tie," a man can wear a suit and tie and ditch the coat if a suit is over-dressed and even ditch the tie if shirt-and-tie is overdressed. But, IMO, it's very hard to design an invitation that will get a bachelor to "do or think differently towards the wedding." I have do other disagreements with PPs, if this is even a disagreement.
  Posted by ElisabethJoanne[/QUOTE]
  
  I agree, I really don't think most guys really care.  Lol.  I showed both formats to my FI and he likes the ones with numbers because it's easier to read and find the info you're looking for. We want things nice and on the fancier side, but spelling everything out seems.....not us. 

  

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• Lisa50 member

  

  May 2012

  Casual dress at a wedding?  No jeans, shorts, sneakers or t-shirts for men or women.  Long pants for men.  Neckties not required.
  
  Dressy attire (or semi-formal dress) at a wedding?  Usually, women are in dresses or skirts although nice pants are perfectly acceptable.  Coat and tie for men, preferably a suit.
  
  Formal dress at a wedding?  Women in any length dresses (or skirts). Men in tuxedos.
  
  White tie dress at a wedding? Women in floor length dresses.  Men in white tie and tails (cutaway coats).
  
  CMGr ... please correct any mistakes I've made, above.  Thanks!

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• mbuckley85 member

  

  May 2012

  We are hoping to convey that we are having a very formal wedding.

  
  

  The date be completely written out, including the year (in words, not numbers)

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