Military Brides

TICKED off.

Our officiant was (yes, i said WAS) my best friends parents. I grew up around them and thought it would be meaningful to have them marry us. With FI being stationed away from us, I went to premarital counseling on my own.

FI is Catholic, however he didn't want a catholic mass. Officiants were Christian. They told us that we both needed to be saved before they married us. I mentioned it to FI to get his thoughts.

Well, thrid meeting in, the officiant and I skyped with FI. They said "OK, I am going to save you now." FI says "Can you please explain to me further what that means exactly?" Officiant says, "Being saved means that any sins you have in your past will be forgotten once you are saved. Anytime you sin in the future, you just need to be saved again and you will once again be allowed in Heaven." SAY WHAAAATT?! FI said "I was baptized, that was when I was saved." Officiant says, "That is NOT being saved. Baptism means nothing. If you don't do this, you are going to hell." Ok, so now FI is just shaking with anger.

So then, they start talking about him being in the military and about how he recently got back form Iraq. He mentioned some PTSD stuff about things he went through while here. The officiants asked him to elaborate on what exaclty he meant. So he did.

I KID YOU NOT. Officiant, without second thought and meaningful as all hellll says, "Like I said, you are going to hell." Soooo, lets just say they are no longer our officiants and we have found someone else.

If that wasn't enough, I got their RSVP in the mail today. They are still coming - That isn't even the best part. They added a date on......for their 12 year old daughter! Seriously?! This doesn't happen often, but I don't even have words.







Wedding Countdown Ticker
image253 Invited
image123 Accepted
image53 Declined
image99 Leavin' Me hangin
RSVP Date: August 5, 2012

Re: TICKED off.

  • Oh. MY. GOSH.

    That's absolutely ridiculous...would it be rude to un-invite? (just sayin)

    I really hope things work out with your new officiant though, hopefully they'll be more sensitive to your FI's PTSD. That comment on your FI's causes for PTSD was TOTALLY uncalled for. Whatever happened to "judge not, lest ye be judged"?
  • Well that's the thing that got me. I am not saying anything bad about Christians (I am Christian myself), but if she claims to be so christian, she should not be judging people like that. She is not the one who gets to judge us!

    I don't even know how to go about uninviting them. I feel like that would be a mess that I don't want to start. And it might be uncomfortable and awkward for my friend. I think we are just going to try to be the bigger people here with them.

    People. eye roll here!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image253 Invited
    image123 Accepted
    image53 Declined
    image99 Leavin' Me hangin
    RSVP Date: August 5, 2012
  • That is wayyyy crappy. But, you shouldn't uninvite them. It would make you look so bad. I'm sorry you're going through that, I hate people who judge based off of their interpretation of what God thinks. If only they'd realize that they're sinning, themselves.
  • I agree. I am just going to brush it off and act like she doesn't make me want to kick puppies.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image253 Invited
    image123 Accepted
    image53 Declined
    image99 Leavin' Me hangin
    RSVP Date: August 5, 2012
  • wowww  My first marriage was to active duty army... we went thru 1 korea tour together and 1 iraq tour. I can't even IMAGINE going thru that officiant... wow.... 

    Good luck with the wedding and happy wishes after! 

    Daisypath Wedding tickers
  • WOW!  I'm not sure what version of the Bible they've studied, but it obviously isn't any of the 6 different versions I have.  That's nuts.  
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Not wedding related, but 2 years ago, I had someone who was going to baptize my son from my church when he was 9 months old tell me that my son would be going to hell if he didnt get baptised right away and that we were also going to hell if we didnt get "saved" for having a child out of wedlock. So I feel your pain on not knowing what to say, I dont even remember walking out of that place I was so angry. Your new officient should be so much more understanding. 
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