Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?

calli0pe00 · February 2010

The chinese takeout box, although fun and kitschy, I think is kind of weird as a favor at a chinese wedding. I mean, the takeout box to me represents a nation of people who are crazy hard workers and a lot of them work in restaraunts and work long hours just to survive, and I dont want my family's first exposure to the chinese culture be epitomized by a takeout box. Am I thinking too much about this? Is it popular to give them out at chinese weddings? Is my FI's family going to think I'm super tacky? (I realize that I do not have to choose this as my favor, but I am rather curious about how other people handle it.)

pengwins · February 2010

It doesn't have to be very obviously Chinese food takeout containers do they? Like the tacky Chinese-esque font saying Wong's Kitchen?

There's some cute ones that are just solid coloured or personalized in a not so traditional colour, and I've seen them at Chinese weddings. Stock white with red lettering, I feel, is kinda tacky.

But I doubt people are going to read that much into it.

junelley · February 2010

This is only my own personal opinion but I am staying away from Chinese take-out boxes, fortunes cookies and of the sort for my wedding. My FI's family already lacks knowledge of Chinese culture and customs, and I don't want them to further sterotype me and my family. I prefer to only include the authentic elements of Chinese culture to the best I can.

I think I have seen Chinese take-out boxes at Chinese weddings, though. Some are really cute, but I just don't feel comfortable using them in my wedding as they don't really represent me and I really don't want my FI's family to be exposed to that. lol

jenandcris · February 2010

I ditto Junelly. I'm Cantonese from my mother's side- and although my father's side is also Asian, they always stereotype and crack jokes to my siblings/mother/myself about anything Chinese-related. It gets old! Also, FI is not Asian. His family automatically assumes a Chinese take-out-esque wedding with pork fried rice, general gau's chicken, fortune cookies & etc because they think it's the right "touch" of Chinese.

A cool favor that FI and I are planning on doing is having my uncles write people's name in Chinese and Cambodian on a scroll.

ring_pop · February 2010

On the one hand, you are kind of overthinking it and as a Chinese person, I doubt I'd go to a wedding and be offended at seeing a take-out box as a favour.

On the other hand, much like fortune cookies - take-out boxes aren't really Chinese. They're pretty American. (I've never seen them in Canada either.) So if you're looking for a way to represent your fi's culture, it's not really the most authentic way to do so.

And finally... if you don't like the idea for whatever reason, don't do it. Simple.

jenwindy · February 2010

Ring_pop said it perfectly.

I'll add that my best friend gave Chinese takeout box favors at her 430 guest Chinese wedding and no one around voiced anything negative about it. Another option might be dim sum steamers. I used those at my wedding to tie in the dim sum hor d'oeuvre theme we were doing.

LanaJade · February 2010

My personal opinion is that they seem culturally tacky because, as ring_pop said, they're more representative of Americanized Chinese culture. I also agree with your opinion of what it represents.

I really like the dim sum bamboo steamer idea. Some people disagree on this, but I'd like a beautiful pair of chopsticks as favors, and perhaps include instruction cards on how to use them. Another idea, and this might be a bit expensive, is jade that can be hung on a red string. I'm probably not describing it well though.

jccswl · February 2010

I did take out boxes as favors for our wedding, we filled them with Mexican wedding cookies (my culture) and fortune cookies (his culture), I know I could've done another type of Chinese dessert, but the fortune cookies we got had a personlized message. My MIL didn't mind, so I went ahead with it.

calli0pe00 · February 2010

Thank you to junelley, jenandchris, and lanajade! Your commments were so helpful! I'm definitely going to stay away from it, I know that we can find something else so much more charming.

ring_pop · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_chinese-weddings_chinese-takeout-container-favors-considered-tacky-chinese-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:397Discussion:a71d6455-5df6-4b79-990f-e0824e17bc1fPost:60d55016-e53c-45f9-9bd9-e754c4fa180a">Re: Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thank you to junelley, jenandchris, and lanajade! Your commments were so helpful! I'm definitely going to stay away from it, I know that we can find something else so much more charming. :)
Posted by starletontherise[/QUOTE]
And what of the rest of us who didn't exactly agree with you... what are we, chopped liver? Harumph.

LanaJade · February 2010

I should have also added, that I've also been to a wedding where the favors were red takeout boxes filled with candy. I didn't think anything negative-- I just really enjoyed the candy! hehe

It's your wedding, you should do whatever you like! But by you already asking the question, you seem to be hesitant anyway and wanted some validation from us. Hope we can help you find other favors that can represent Chinese culture.

foolforfood · February 2010

I bought these plain white boxes for my candy buffet and placed a monogram label/sticker on each. I thought they looked cute and perhaps even "charming."

It never entered my mind that ppl would view them as tacky. I bought them b/c I thought they looked much more substantial than cellophane bags - not b/c I wanted to incorporate my Asian background or introduce my heritage to my Jewish inlaws...

As a former sociology major, I am as tree-hugging as they come. Yet, I have never reached the domain of social consciousness as you have. I think you are over-analyzing the situation. But like others have said, it's your wedding and you should do what is best for you.

I would like to note that even the most authentic Chinese restaurants use these takeout containers. I'm talking about the hole in the whole restaurants that only have Chinese language menus and Chinese signs on the storefront...the ones that don't cater to Americanized taste buds. I was just at a Chinatown dim sum restaurant yesterday and not once did I notice the old Chinese ladies harping about the Americanization of Chinese food and culture, as they filled their takeout containers with goodies....

ring_pop · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_chinese-weddings_chinese-takeout-container-favors-considered-tacky-chinese-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:397Discussion:a71d6455-5df6-4b79-990f-e0824e17bc1fPost:1cbe4a7b-27f0-4b22-a536-74fa8053073a">Re: Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]I would like to note that even the most authentic Chinese restaurants use these takeout containers. I'm talking about the hole in the whole restaurants that only have Chinese language menus and Chinese signs on the storefront...the ones that don't cater to Americanized taste buds. I was just at a Chinatown dim sum restaurant yesterday and not once did I notice the old Chinese ladies harping about the Americanization of Chinese food and culture, as they filled their takeout containers with goodies....
Posted by foolforfood[/QUOTE]
My comment about them being "American" was simply in reference to the fact that I've never seen them in Asia, or even in Canada. Therefore my assumption is that they're an American phenomenon, but that's not to say that only "Americanized" places use them.

jenandcris · February 2010

I can see ring_pop, Jen, and FFF's points. Take-out boxes can be displayed beautifully if done well. ... And I like Jen's dimsum steamer idea!

Take-out boxes don't work for me because I find my family's racist/stereo-typical comments irritating.

junelley · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_chinese-weddings_chinese-takeout-container-favors-considered-tacky-chinese-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:397Discussion:a71d6455-5df6-4b79-990f-e0824e17bc1fPost:669e87f6-444d-4915-9b59-8c97e1f7cd05">Re: Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]I Take-out boxes don't work for me because I find my family's racist/stereo-typical comments irritating.
Posted by jenandcris[/QUOTE]

Ditto this. My FILs have made several racist/stereotypical comments which I find extremely irritating, hence my strong feeling against take-out boxes, etc. for my wedding.

calli0pe00 · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_chinese-weddings_chinese-takeout-container-favors-considered-tacky-chinese-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:397Discussion:a71d6455-5df6-4b79-990f-e0824e17bc1fPost:9d0ec9ab-03f8-4b71-8075-ce6dc366909f">Re: Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding? : And what of the rest of us who didn't exactly agree with you... what are we, chopped liver? Harumph.
Posted by ring_pop[/QUOTE]

I am thankful to everyone who posted. Having a discussion is great in this "knottie" community. The people who I singled out was because I felt that they understood my situation best. This is obviously a case by case thing, because as other people have said, they are choosing to not do it based on how their family has negative sterotypes. As I said, my family has a very low understanding of chinese culture and I do not want to further their learning by giving them, what they think they already know. I can see how in other situations and especially if neither person is chinese (the couple), this favor would be fine. What I am trying to point out is that as someone who is embracing the chinese culture as now a part of my life, I would love to banish the take out boxes in favor of something a lot more represntative of China.

foolforfood · February 2010

What part of China is your FI's family from? You love the idea of bamboo steamers, right? From my understanding, these steamers originate from Eastern China. They don't exactly represent the traditions of all Chinese.

Also, was your FI born in the states? Even if he's an immigrant, I'm sure he considers himself to be Chinese American, rather than Chinese. If that's the case, you don't need to tread so softly around the topic of ethic authenticity.

mp0807 · February 2010

I'm doing the mini chinese takeout box and filling it with chocolate drizzled fortune cookies. Tacky? Maybe, but I like the idea

I'm Chinese and FI is caucasian. We're having a chinese reception which will be very new and novel to his family.

Personally, I think you should do whatever is comfortable and appeals to you and your FI. There are so many different regions with their own traditions and take on what's 'authentic Chinese'. At the end of the night, your friends and family are there to celebrate your marriage and not to pick apart your choices for a wedding favor.

calli0pe00 · February 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_chinese-weddings_chinese-takeout-container-favors-considered-tacky-chinese-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:397Discussion:a71d6455-5df6-4b79-990f-e0824e17bc1fPost:5de92469-d684-4978-9467-c0138911bcc1">Re: Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm doing the mini chinese takeout box and filling it with chocolate drizzled fortune cookies. Tacky? Maybe, but I like the idea :) I'm Chinese and FI is caucasian. We're having a chinese reception which will be very new and novel to his family. Personally, I think you should do whatever is comfortable and appeals to you and your FI. There are so many different regions with their own traditions and take on what's 'authentic Chinese'. At the end of the night, your friends and family are there to celebrate your marriage and not to pick apart your choices for a wedding favor.
Posted by mp0807[/QUOTE]
Nicely put! :)

Are chinese takeout container favors considered tacky at a chinese wedding?

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