Reception ONLY Invite wording

sjmancini86 · October 2010

We are inviting a number of extra guests only to the reception after dinner, as we both have a number of co-workers etc. that we feel should be included, but dont wish to have join us for the ceremony and dinner. We simply cant afford to invite them and their families. So-I am making different invites for these people...what is the best way to word these politely and still make them feel welcome to come dance drink and have dessert with us later in the evening?? The wedding is on New Years Eve so it's not likely the evening will be ending early!
Thanks!!

goetzr19 · October 2010

Do it how you want. Not everyone has a huge budget, and I'm assuming your friends and co-workers understand that. Where I'm from, it's a common thing to be invited to the whole wedding, and common to be invited to only the reception. I've been invited to only the reception, and I was not offended in the slightest. I understand that people have budgets, and I felt honored that they invited me at all. I think the wording advice that was given sounds great.

banana468 · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_reception-only-invite-wording-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:498f06ec-9e69-402c-b221-4eef9b4f14f9Post:abdabe2e-61ce-436f-b8c7-137a9fc33388">Re: Reception ONLY Invite wording</a>:
[QUOTE]Do it how you want. Not everyone has a huge budget, and I'm assuming your friends and co-workers understand that. Where I'm from, it's a common thing to be invited to the whole wedding, and common to be invited to only the reception. I've been invited to only the reception, and I was not offended in the slightest. I understand that people have budgets, and I felt honored that they invited me at all. I think the wording advice that was given sounds great.
Posted by goetzr19[/QUOTE]

Goetzr, plenty of people are on a budget when planning a wedding. That does not excuse what is a rather rude practice of inviting people to only a portion of the party.

The OP can do what she desires, but she needs to understand that what she is proposing to do is not appropriate at all and it may be considered quite offensive to many guests.

kelseyyy22 · October 2010

I really liked Needle's advice. But maybe even putting in something along the lines of ...

"We would love to accomadate all at the ceremony and dinner, but due to finances we can't. We would love for you to still celebrate with us..."

Blah, blah, blah. Obnviously something a little finer put, but something like that. With this economy I think people would really understand this, especially if you're upfront and honest. My feelings would not be hurt, and would still love to share that person's special day. Hoped to have helped!

aerinpegadrak · October 2010

There's no polite way to tell someone, "I only want to invite you to the part I don't have to pay for," because it's not a nice thing to do. You are not royalty, and your guests are not peasants who will forever cherish the table scraps you deign to throw them. If you're not close enough to these people to want them at the whole party, they're probably not close enough to YOU to care if they're invited at all. Don't make the mistake of thinking that every person you've ever met is desperate to attend your wedding.

tam427 · October 2010

Agreed - Don't do it. I would be highly offended if I received an invitation to a "portion" of the wedding! If you must celebrate with these people and simply can't afford to, then throw a nice party later on for your work colleagues & families that is unrelated to your wedding. OR Invite your colleagues and not their families.

goetzr19 · October 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_reception-only-invite-wording-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:498f06ec-9e69-402c-b221-4eef9b4f14f9Post:01ac2eb6-8cc4-45bc-a5c8-90e7b63dca07">Re: Reception ONLY Invite wording</a>:
[QUOTE]There's no polite way to tell someone, "I only want to invite you to the part I don't have to pay for," because it's not a nice thing to do. You are not royalty, and your guests are not peasants who will forever cherish the table scraps you deign to throw them. If you're not close enough to these people to want them at the whole party, they're probably not close enough to YOU to care if they're invited at all. Don't make the mistake of thinking that every person you've ever met is desperate to attend your wedding.
Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]

How is the reception the part that isn't paid for? You have cake, favors, dj, alcohol or other drinks, etc. There is still money involved.

aerinpegadrak · October 2010

But she said she wanted to invite them after dinner. Aside from possibly the bar, she wouldn't be paying any extra for guests who show up after the meal. Inviting guests to the entire reception, but not to the ceremony, is a different issue.

eureka30030 · March 2012

I am very surprised at the responses here! My FI & I were thinking the same thing as the original poster. We are not having a huge wedding by any means but we do want a huge all-night party. I don't think theres anything wrong with letting some of our more distant buddy's know they're invited to a Free booze alll nighter. That being said, I would still want after dinner snacks for them, and I would put on their invities something about them not bringing a gift. I don't think its tacky at all if your wedding is more casual party hardy than formal & stuffy.... Maybe something like "Unfortunatly due to space & budgeting were are unable to host everyone we would like. However we would love you to celebrate with us! Please join us for our all night celebration starting at __. Please no gifts, just yourself and let's get this party started!"

Reception ONLY Invite wording

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