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Destination Weddings Discussions

AHR attire....opinions/help.

Hi ladies! I'm hoping to get some advice.

So our AHR is a little more formal. It's sit down dinner, open bar etc. However the only "wedding" thing we're doing is a first dance because FI wanted it and I didn't want to fight it. No cake cutting, no toasts (although we are getting up to say thank you!) no boquet toss or anything like that. I just want a party!

So I do NOT want to wear my dress. One, I think it's dumb to wear it when we've already been married close to 2 weeks at that point. It seems vaguely AW'ish and well....odd. I'm not a bride by then, I'm a wife. Two, my dress is hot. It's really. freaking. hot. I want to dance! Three, I don't LOVE my dress. My dress is nice, my dress is fine, I just don't LOVE it to the point I'd be thrilled to put it on again. My plan was to get a shorter white cocktail dress and wear that with a sweater.

I talked to my stepmom yesterday. She was SHOCKED I wasn't planning on wearing my wedding dress to the AHR and said people will want to see it and seemed borderline offended I didn't want to. She's also paying for the AHR.

What would you do? Wear it to make her happy since she's paying? Say screw it and wear what I want?? Help!

Cliff Notes: My stempom who is paying for the AHR really, really, really wants me to wear my wedding dress. I really, really, really don't want to.

Re: AHR attire....opinions/help.

  • Hmmmm, would it be an option to wear it for your first dance and then change into your short cute dress? then everyone gets to check it out but you aren't stuck in it all night long?

    Or - just have some pictures of you two in your wedding outfits up for folks to see?

    I'm not really a lot of help. lol

  • That sounds like a great middle ground!!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Yeah we're doing a slideshow that should have at the very least candid shots of the wedding so people can see my dress. Idk I think I'm going to hold my ground on this one. I don't wanna wear that monstrosity lol.
  • I was just thinking about this the other day and what to wear. I know I plan on not wearing my dress although I have heard I should. I plan on having picture centerpieces and a slideshow so i see no reason as everyone will see it in the pictures. 

    I don't want/expect people to wear tuxes and stuff to my AHR, i just want them to have fun yet I want to look nice so I am conflicted as well as you! 
    Anniversary
  • Stand your ground! Just have as many pics as possible.. If you liked your dress if say compromise and wear it for the dance, but you don't and shouldn't feel obliged to wear it... Get that short fun dress! :) It's still your day... Do it your way.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • I completely understand how you feel.  My whole family thinks I should wear my dress.  I'm not going to though, I'm wearing a short party dress for the AHR!  I feel like I would feel silly in a wedding gown 3 weeks after the fact.

    We will have tons of wedding pics displayed and we are also having a slideshow so everyone can see me in my dress!
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    Wedding Countdown Ticker


  • I struggled with this decision as well and decided to go with a short white cocktail dress. I was soooo happy I made that decision. I think I would have felt awkward in my wedding dress. I have heard that some people get their wedding dress hemmed to be short so that may be a good compromise.

    BabyFruit Ticker
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