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Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Including our 3yr old son in wedding ceremony

My fiance and I are getting married in March and we already have a 3 year old son together. I really want to include him in our ceremony and have been trying to look up some ideas online, but almost everything I am finding is how to incorporate children of blended families. He is an extrememly important part of our lives and I want him to know and feel that on our special day. I don't think we would be where we are today if it wasn't for him. He has been such a blessing to the both of us. If anyone has any ideas/suggestions - I would love to hear them! Thanks!

Re: Including our 3yr old son in wedding ceremony

  • I think making him a ring bearer would be approriate for his age. That is important role. Beyond that, he's probably too young to really understand the importance of the day. He'll look adorable in his special little outfit bringing the rings down the isle.

  • I agree with the pp.

    The ceremony is about you and FI getting married. It's great that you both love your son so much, but no matter how you swing it, the marriage ceremony is only for 2 people Wink

  • You are already a family. Dress him up and take a million pictures. The ceremony itself is for two consenting adults and should not involve a child.
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  • kaos16kaos16 member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    edited October 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_including-our-3yr-old-son-in-wedding-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:5a763569-1efe-4ff8-8665-8dd89d5378eePost:1927c99c-199c-473f-a52d-e0dea9803379">Re: Including our 3yr old son in wedding ceremony</a>:
    [QUOTE]You are already a family. Dress him up and take a million pictures. The ceremony itself is for two consenting adults and should not involve a child.
    Posted by artbyallie[/QUOTE]

    this is exactly what i would say.
  • He would probably be an ADORABLE ring bearer. My nephew was 5 and was our ring bearer and 2 of our nieces were teh flower girls and they were 3 years old. Make sure though that during the part he will probably lose interest in (aka 5 minutes after mommy walks down the aisle), that you have someone nearby to help keep an eyeball on him.

    Also: FUN idea. Have him carry down a little sign that say "Hey Daddy here comes Mom"! It is a cute alternative to having him carry down a pillow with fake rings on it.

  • we are getting married in March and our son will be 3 1/2 by then. He is going to be our ring bearer but the vows being will not be changed. The way we look at it is the vows you are taking are between you and your husband and if the vows are followed then the whole family present and future is a part of that committment.

    Besides, once you have a child your life becomes about them and being a good mom, take this one day for yourself to be a bride, become a wife, and at the end of the day you will still be an awesome mom on top of it. :)

    Good luck and Congrats!
  • I just attended a wedding where the bride's son was the RB. The son considers the groom his father, although he is not. During the ceremony, the bride and groom presented the son with a tie clip to represent being together and to serve as a reminder of the special day as he gets older. He is 4.
  • Assuming he can handle being in the ceremony, you might make him a ring bearer.  But as important as it is to you to have him there, I'd make sure he understands what you want from him before you just go through with it, and even be prepared for him to act out, have a meltdown, or otherwise behave in a way that isn't consistent with what you're expecting from him.
  • We are getting married November 3rd and our 3yr old son is our ring bearer! After we are announced as Mr and Mrs....we will walk back down the aisle, holding his hands between us.
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  • I was a junior bride in my mom and dads way back when and My cousin escorted me.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_including-our-3yr-old-son-in-wedding-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:5a763569-1efe-4ff8-8665-8dd89d5378eePost:62f1aba9-6e2b-4b5b-905d-7c828148a321">Re: Including our 3yr old son in wedding ceremony</a>:
    [QUOTE]We are getting married November 3rd and our 3yr old son is our ring bearer! After we are announced as Mr and Mrs....we will walk back down the aisle, holding his hands between us.
    Posted by hshertenlieb[/QUOTE]

    Such a cute idea!!!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_including-our-3yr-old-son-in-wedding-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:5a763569-1efe-4ff8-8665-8dd89d5378eePost:a34fc2b2-a09f-4a0a-a5ca-0e5c0fb56e89">Re: Including our 3yr old son in wedding ceremony</a>:
    [QUOTE]we are getting married in March and our son will be 3 1/2 by then. He is going to be our ring bearer but the vows being will not be changed. The way we look at it is the vows you are taking are between you and your husband and if the vows are followed then the whole family present and future is a part of that committment. Besides, once you have a child your life becomes about them and being a good mom, take this one day for yourself to be a bride, become a wife, and at the end of the day you will still be an awesome mom on top of it. :) Good luck and Congrats!
    Posted by tiffanygoss[/QUOTE]

    Thank you! Our son will be 3 1/2 when we get married in March too : ) And I LOVE your point of view "once you have a child your life becomes about them and being a good mom, take this one day for yourself to be a bride" - couldn't agree more!!!
  • I have seen a beautiful ceremony between a couple who had a baby girl before their wedding and they both wrote vows out dedicating their world to her. It was beautiful and very memorable! He may not be old enough the realize it now but later on it will really mean something to him.
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  • My ex's brother and s-i-l had a daughter before they were married and in their wedding, they actually did a ring ceremony with her, too. It was the neatest thing ever!! They bought her a mini gold band and after their ring ceremony, they brought her up (she was the FG), and the pastor did a ring ceremony for her. I don't remember exactly what he said, but it basically said that she was their creation and a part of their marriage, too, as she was their child and would always be a part of their family, etc. It was super cute and very sweet.
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