I feel cheap--what do you think?

tookie1978 · April 2010

I bought my girls each the friendship bracelet from the knot wedding shop, a heart shaped personalized keychain, and each a personalized picture frame that has their title plus a personal message from me in it.
I feel like I should be getting something more. Maybe because I know how expensive it can be to be in a wedding. They just threw me an awesome shower this past weekend and I feel bad that I only spent about $45 on each of them.
What do you think?

tidetravel · April 2010

It's not about the money - it really is the thought.

Don't take this the wrong way, but I think that the gifts are pretty generic. Like, "Hey... cool... I got a keychain... Yay..." You've already bought them, so it is what it is. If you want to personalize the gift some and you have the money to do so, maybe choose something small for each of them that suits their particular interests/tastes. Does one BM love reading? Get her a great book. Another like the spa? Maybe a small GC.

saxy414 · April 2010

I don't think you're cheap--it has everything to do with your budget. If that's what you can afford, then that's it.

But, I think you need to either add on or rethink your gifts. Your BMs will appreciate your gift much more if you shop for them like it's their birthday/Christmas/gift-giving occasion, and get them something that fits their personality instead of something matchy-matchy and wedding related. All those gifts are nice, but not everyone likes fancy keychains or wears bracelets. Think about their favorite restaurant or author or their favorite sports team and head in that direction.

momofayden · April 2010

It's not about cost but about the thought behind the gift. You know your girls better than I so if you think they will like it, I wouldn't worry. Make sure to give them a copy of the picture from the wedding of you and each girl and a personalized note. I think that would make a really nice gift.

xoxob · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_feel-cheap-think?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:419ed008-810b-4fbf-bc93-8c84c8f10ff3Post:a02f23eb-b943-4760-8a3c-65ff05f4a359">Re: I feel cheap--what do you think?</a>:
[QUOTE]It's not about the money - it really is the thought. Don't take this the wrong way, but I think that the gifts are pretty generic. Like, "Hey... cool... I got a keychain... Yay..." You've already bought them, so it is what it is. If you want to personalize the gift some and you have the money to do so, maybe choose something small for each of them that suits their particular interests/tastes. Does one BM love reading? Get her a great book. Another like the spa? Maybe a small GC.
Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

Can I just co-sign on this?

duckie1905 · April 2010

I wouldn't really care about the money in a situation like this. I would never think "boy, she was really cheap about my gift." I would think, though "Wow, she doesn't know me at all and didn't put any thought into this."

stina93446 · April 2010

Ditto what tide said.

CA2MT4EveR · April 2010

I hate when people worry about the cost of something instead of the thought of something. I would much prefer a handmade gift someone made (for any occasion) because they put thought in to it.

rainedrop6 · April 2010

As MOH in my sister's wedding she gave me a necklace from Tiffany (which I really really wanted and was a perfect thoughtful gift for just me) and a frame that says Rainedrop6 - Maid of Honor and her wedding date with a picture of us . Upon opening them, I was way more excited about the necklace then the frame.

Today, almost 6 years later, the necklace (which I love) is in my jewelry box but the frame is on my dresser and I see it every night. I have a lot of necklaces but I only have one frame that says MOH and seeing it reminds me of one of the happiest days of my sister's life and how I was such a special part of it and that memory means more to me then the necklace ever will.

OP, I think your gifts are nice. l just wanted you to know not everyone hates getting a gift with their title on it , I ended up preferring it and please don't worry about how much your gift cost because it truly doesn't matter.

As for being generic, I can guarantee it's the only frame in the world with my name and title, her wedding date, and our picture so it's actually pretty personal. I'm almost positive thousands of other girls have the same necklace.

MyNameIsNot · April 2010

What Tide said.

It's the thought that counts, not the money. A generic BM frame or keychain says "I put 0.5 seconds of thought into this, and got it checked off my list." Take the time to add something personal and individual to each girl's interests and tastes. They'll think "wow, she actually put some effort into this! What a considerate friend." Personally, I'd much rather get a $10 GC to my favorite store than a $50 anything with bridesmaid printed on it.

90% of people would toss something that says bridesmaid on it by your first anniversary. Most people just don't need any more knick knacks and stuff laying around their house.

CA2MT4EveR · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_feel-cheap-think?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:419ed008-810b-4fbf-bc93-8c84c8f10ff3Post:76e914cd-f3b3-4056-afb3-fcf195648475">Re: I feel cheap--what do you think?</a>:
[QUOTE]As MOH in my sister's wedding she gave me a necklace from Tiffany (which I really really wanted and was a perfect thoughtful gift for just me) and a frame that says Rainedrop6 - Maid of Honor and her wedding date with a picture of us . Upon opening them, I was way more excited about the necklace then the frame. Today, almost 6 years later, the necklace (which I love) is in my jewelry box but the frame is on my dresser and I see it every night. I have a lot of necklaces but <strong>I only have one frame that says MOH and seeing it reminds me of one of the happiest days of my sister's life and how I was such a special part of it and that memory means more to me then the necklace ever will. </strong> OP, I think your gifts are nice. l just wanted you to know not everyone hates getting a gift with their title on it , I ended up preferring it and please don't worry about how much your gift cost because it truly doesn't matter. As for being generic, I can guarantee it's the only frame in the world with my name and title, her wedding date, and our picture so it's actually pretty personal. I'm almost positive thousands of other girls have the same necklace.
Posted by rainedrop6[/QUOTE]

Maybe because she is your sister. My home is not filled with pictures of friends anymore (like it was in college), it has pictures that fit my decor, and a few of BF and me. I do have one small area of "friend" frames, but I know those will eventually be taken off the shelf as well once I have children. Yes, the personalization on it is nice, and is not so generic on that one, though I still see the point others are making.

melaniejonathan2010 · April 2010

I don't think you were being cheap. Yes it is the thought that counts. I got all my bridesmaids cute little photo albums that were inexpensive. I am going to put a picture of myself and them on the first page of each album. I ordered the MOH a tote in addition and I'm paying for all of their jewelry. Your just simply stating Thanks for being a part of my special day. It doesn't have to be anything extravagant.

emilyinchile · April 2010

I think rainedrop brought up a good point, which is that some people do actually like that kind of stuff (although I too wonder if the fact that it's your sister doesn't have a lot to do with it). But I think those people are in the minority. Personally, I would be really honored to be a friend's MOH, but having a picture frame with my "title" and the date on it brings me back to the favors we got at sorority formals...none of which I have anymore. I'd rather have a nice picture frame without any engraving or personalization.

I feel cheap--what do you think?

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