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Food and Cakes

Chocolate Cake

I have always wanted a chocolate wedding cake with buttercream icing because that is my favorite.  When I got engaged I mentioned the to my FI and he said no right away.  He says that is it not "socially acceptable" to have a chocolate wedding cake.  I have tried to tell him that the wedding is about us and what we like, not what everyone else thinks about it, but he won't budge.  My mom is upset that I won't have my chocolate cake and she says that since she's paying for it, she will order the chocolate cake.

I don't want this to be an issue that causes a rift between my FI and my mom.  Do you ladies have any ideas for compromise?

Re: Chocolate Cake

  • fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I had a 4 tiered wedding cake and we made one of the tiers chocolate with ganache filling and it was by far the most popular.  Traditionally the groom's cake is chocolate (we didn't have a groom's cake) but these days the bride's cake can be any flavor, multi-flavored, etc. 

    To say it's not "socially acceptable" is pretty ridiculous (no offense to your FI).  Would he accept just having 1 tier of the bride's cake chocolate like we did?
  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    If the cake is going to have several tiers, have one that isn't chocolate and let your FI pick the flavor.  Compromise is key, in wedding planning and in marriage.
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  • ccenter1ccenter1 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree do 1 tier chocolate of your cake. They used white cake back in the day because chocolate would sometimes show through the buttercream icing. But if youre using fondant it wont so now chocolate is one of the most popular flavors in my cake shop. Or traditionally the grooms cake is chocolate if youre having one.
  • edited December 2011
    Out of curiousity exactly what kind of cake would be socially acceptable?

    I'd split the tiers' flavours too.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_chocolate-cake?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:23Discussion:ad285500-45d8-42b8-9ea9-9aefb39ab973Post:96b15fe1-36f2-469e-ade3-336663eda76e">Chocolate Cake</a>:
    [QUOTE]He says that is it not "socially acceptable" to have a chocolate wedding cake.
    Posted by atolar[/QUOTE]

    WTF?  I am confused by this. 
  • edited December 2011
    We're having either a 3 or 4 tier cake...either way at least 1 of those tiers is going to be chocolate. Chocolate cake is my favorite; Yellow cake is his. So that's what our cake will consist of. I don't understand how chocolate isn't "socially acceptable", but even if it wasn't - you do what you like!

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  • HinajHinaj member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Who decides what is "socially acceptable"?  The wedding is about you two, and leaving up to the guest, there will always be someone unsatisfied by the choice.  So do what makes both of you happy, compromise and as everyone else said splitting the cake with different flavor. 

    On a personal note, I LOVE chocholate cake!! 
  • edited December 2011
    He wants a white/vanilla cake.  I'm going to talk to the bakery and see if they could make a white chocolate cake, or a red velvet with a hint of red.

    I've tried to get him to explain the "socially acceptable" part, but I never get a straigt answer out of him. 

    I'm also thinking of making out top tier chocolate and serving it to just us and the wedding party.  I'm not interested in freezing it so I think he ma go for this idea.
  • Ken&CassKen&Cass member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    My entire cake is going to be covered in Chocolate Buttercream, and two of the layers are going to be chocolate cake. The other layer will be almond, but still frosted with chocolate. I really don't understand how a flavor could be 'socially unacceptable' and think your mom is right to be irritated.
    FYI we are having all buttercream and they are layering ivory over the chocolate buttercream so it's the color we want but also the taste. Tell him he gets to pick a tier and you get to pick a tier and call it a day. If he's not willing to comprimise on such a simple thing I would totally get cold feet!
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  • edited December 2011
    We are serving chocolate cake.  We both love chocolate and decided that if we were serving cake, it would have to be something we love.

    Like pp said, I would go for compromise - one tier for you and one for him.  I suggest talking to the bakery before your tasting and having them help you convince him that having some chocolate is not unacceptable.  Sometimes hearing something from an outside source makes it easier.
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  • pandasquishypandasquishy member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Our whole cake was chocolate.  It was totally acceptable.  
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  • edited December 2011
    I'd suggest showing him this thread!
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