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Wedding Etiquette Forum

dead time between ceremony and reception

I am having my ceremony and reception in the same place. after the ceremony i would like to take some pictures maybe for 45 min or so!( most will be taken before). My dilemma is that I am afraid my guest will be bored. I am not having a cocktail hour nor will I be serving alcohol( I have a small budget) I am stuck for an idea to keep them engaged. any ideas that are cost frindly and by that I mean almost nothing. or would it be rude to just let them socialize amongst themselves and drink punch. My wedding is roughly 2 mos away I need to come up with something quick 

Re: dead time between ceremony and reception

  • You need to host something in between while you're taking pictures.  It doesn't have to be alcoholic, but you should have beverages and light appetizers (even just veggie trays and chips and dip). 



  • You really need to have appetizers and drinks. As PP said, it doesn't need to be alcoholic, but there HAS to be something. You can't just leave people on their own for almost an hour to do nothing. That would suck. I would be pissed if I were your guest. 
  • Two options I see:

    1.  Offer light refreshments (crudite, cheese and crackers, tea/lemonade/coffee) for the 45 minutes or so that your guests will wait. Nobody will probably mind mingling as long as there is some food and drink and maybe some light background music (iPod with speakers is okay).

    2.  Do your photos before the wedding.  Have a first-look with your fiance, and take all bridal party shots before the ceremony.   This way, the only shots you'll need after the ceremony are the family shots. Have a list of each shot you want and who is in each one so you and your photographer can move right through them.   If you're organized you can get through these in about 10 minutes.   While you are doing this your guests can go immediately into the reception hall, start finding their seats, etc (background music would be nice).
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  •  Ditto Avion.  Your current plan is just not acceptable or polite.  Either serve refreshments or take those 45 minutes of photos prior to the ceremony.  You can't strand those people like that!.  My nephew and his wife did all of their pics prior to the wedding and actually were the very first ones to arrive at the reception hall so they could greet their guests.  Dinner was served within minutes.
  • All PPs have had great ideas! You pretty much have to offer something, and none of their suggestions will cost a lot.
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  • Both Avion's ideas are great.

    What kind of refreshments are you having at the reception?  If it's buffet-style and a first look or money for additional snacks is not an option, you could  just have the buffet be open and ready to go as soon as the ceremony ends and let guests begin eating as they arrive.  You and H (and the other people who are needed for pictures) can join in as soon as they're no longer needed for photos.  That's how my H and I did it. 
  • Definitely host some food and drinks, even if they are non-alcoholic. Soft drinks, water, iced tea, etc. are fine. PPs have given idea for some cost-effective apps. You MUST host something if you are asking your guests to stand around for almost an hour. If you can't afford even light apps, you either need to take photos beforehand to eliminate that dead time, or cut from somewhere else in your budget to make the food happen.


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  • If you really have absolutely no money whatsoever to host anything, have you thought about doing first looks and taking care of all of your photos before the ceremony?  That way you won't have a gap for pictures, and you can just go right into the reception.
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  • I think that the posts above are all really great ideas, I hope you find something to run with.  Another thought if you really needed to cut back food and drink is to provide something to do with maybe a smaller amount of food and drink.  I was thinking maybe a photo booth (as in homemade, with a personal camera on a tripod with handmade props or various fun props collected from friends and family, aka no extra cost).  That way they're staying busy maybe taking cute pictures for themselves and for you, they can still grab a bite to eat , but they're not just standing around a table of food waiting on you (because I would definitely be the one overeating just because the food is there and I have nothing better to do!) :)

    Good luck!
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  • I'm not good at waiting, I get irritated in the 10 minute wait before doctors appointments.  However, offer snacks in the interim (especially if it's cheese cubes), and I become extremely patient.  It's amazing what small appetizers will do.
  • You could DIY a photobooth and have a friend take the pictures with a digital camera. At least there would be some activity going on
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dead-time-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c61ef734-23ed-41df-9367-8658607d452fPost:207f5374-b6c7-4b04-8682-4b8e78366dba">Re: dead time between ceremony and reception</a>:
    [QUOTE]Both Avion's ideas are great. What kind of refreshments are you having at the reception?  If it's buffet-style and a first look or money for additional snacks is not an option, you could  just have the buffet be open and ready to go as soon as the ceremony ends and let guests begin eating as they arrive.  You and H (and the other people who are needed for pictures) can join in as soon as they're no longer needed for photos.  That's how my H and I did it. 
    Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]

    I like these options.  Me and FI aren't doing the first look thing because we don't want to see each other before the wedding.  We're going the traditional route.  But having something ready to go whether it's an open buffet or photo booth is going to be important.  I'm even going to put the estimated time frame for things on our website so no one is unpleasantly surprised by what's going on.  But we'll be having a cocktail hour. Oh and my FI just mentioned that our hotel also has one restaurant and one bar so if there are any places nearby for them to go to you could make sure they know about that too.
  • WildMageletWildMagelet member
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    edited August 2012
    We're doing first look & BP shots beforehand so the only thing we'll have is family shots afterwards.  We're going to have some light refreshments available for our guests who head straight over to the reception venue.

    Like PP said, it doesn't have to be a lot, just *something*.  People can socialize while snacking, but you don't want people just twiddling their thumbs at their tables wishing they had a glass of water.
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  • A friend of mine had a wedding a few months ago and they gave us cheese cubes with crackers, water and Coke.  Very cost effective and everyone's happy.
  • If you don't want to do a first look you could still get some of the bridal party photos done ahead of time. You with yours and him with his, and then just do the ones with you both after, it would still save you time, and your makeup would probably be fresher!
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  • We are now dealing with this because of our church needing us to have our ceremony earlier than planned because of Saturday night service.  We are on a budget so decided to have veggie trays and cheese and crackers available (along with unlimited beer, soda and coffee) for guests while they wait.  You can still do something to please your guests and not go over budget.  
  • Keep in mind that making your guests wait for 45 minutes WILL be the topic of conversation over dinner.  Not "isn't she beautiful", "wasn't that a lovely service" or "what a cute couple".  No it will be how rude it is to strand people for 45 minutes in the same venue with absolutely nothing.  
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dead-time-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c61ef734-23ed-41df-9367-8658607d452fPost:1e0daa85-6b06-4c0d-929b-60d0047c8563">Re: dead time between ceremony and reception</a>:
    [QUOTE]You could DIY a photobooth and have a friend take the pictures with a digital camera. At least there would be some activity going on
    Posted by swaters12[/QUOTE]

    I agree with swaters, have food and some sort of activities. Crudite and and cheese platters are the easiest for food and for beverages, try and get those clear drink dispensers with nice lemonade, iced tea, etc. Try out a photobooth, or if its outside, have some games like cornhole(that bean bag game) or horseshoes. If you can set up a lounge area- borrow some old couches and cover them with color-coordinated sheets/slipcovers- that way guests have a place to GO. Good luck!
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